“Walk This Way” NY Style: The Dirty Pearls and DMC

[youtube http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-FtDIIvMwY4?rel=0]

Occasionally The Sexy Armpit visits New Jersey’s wise ass older brother, New York. I went to check out The Dirty Pearls concert at Webster Hall which was also broadcast live on New York’s Rock station 101.9 WRXP. New York City is not only The Dirty Pearls home, but it’s aura gets them high as they immortalized in their last single “New York City is a Drug.” (They love New York as much as The Sexy Armpit loves Jersey.) That track ended their abbreviated set, but they also ripped through songs from their forthcoming album Whether You Like It or Not including their new single “Who’s Coming Back to Who?” and closed the set with a seismic rendition of The Ramones’ “Do You Remember Rock ‘n’ Roll Radio?”

No question, the highlight of the night came when they invited their much buzzed about “special guest” up on stage to perform with them. Lead singer Tommy London introduced none other than Darryl McDaniels, aka DMC from RUN f’n DMC!!! The crowd went ballistic when they heard the familiar guitar riff from “Walk This Way” as The Dirty Pearls mixed it up and shuffled back and forth on stage with the hip hop legend.

And for those of you who are contending that this post is not related to Jersey in any way – one of RXP’s DJs and hosts of the concert last night was New Jersey native Matt Pinfield, so that counts for something! Oh, and according to the omniscient Wikipedia, DMC currently resides in Wayne, NJ. Maybe The Dirty Pearls could sing “New Jersey is a Drug” for The Sexy Armpit next time they come to Jersey?

“You Know That New Sound You’re Lookin’ For?…”

[youtube http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X_jNT3vJai0?rel=0]
*After watching this a few times I realized that the creators of this video omitted some major acts! The Duprees from Jersey City, The Misfits from Lodi, as well as The Rascals who originally formed in Garfield NJ. Just read the comments on YouTube in response to this video and you’ll see about 50 more acts that were not included. I guess the video would’ve had to have been 25 minutes rather than 5.

I was tipped off to this video package by my FB friend Sil Atda BadaBing and it showcases musicians and singers who hail from New Jersey. The video has been making the rounds on the Internet recently and it was produced by Charles Ricciardi and Steven Gorelick for the NJ Hall of Fame ceremony. The Sexy Armpit goes on record as saying that Hall of Fames are dumb and meaningless. KISS not being inducted to the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame proves that. Better yet, the fact that Madonna and RUN DMC made it in before KISS is preposterous considering that the first KISS album, which has only gotten better with age, was released in 1974! The NJ Hall of Fame is just another excuse to charge an insane amount of money for a ticket to an event where the elite like to kiss each others asses and the rich stick their noses in the air. F*ck that! Great video on music from the Garden State though. And for all of you New Jersey writers and bloggers, The NJ Hall of Fame treated The Armpit like a 2nd rate citizen a couple of years back, so there is one New Jersey organization that should be tossed out with the rest of our trash. They’ll see, The Sexy Armpit is gonna make like Goldie Wilson and clean up this town!

NJ T-Shirt Tuesday 44: New Jersey RUN DMC Style

zazzle,run dmc,t-shirt,new jersey

If you want to look like a pioneer of hip-hop music then you may want to buy a classic Run DMC t-shirt and slip on a pair of shell top Adidas sneakers. Then pick yourself up a ridiculously over sized gold chain and some sunglasses, prop your ghetto blaster up on your shoulder and you’ll be good to go. Or, if you’re aiming much lower and you want to look like a complete dork from New Jersey, then sub out the Run DMC tee for this NEW JRZ tee, get your hair blown out, and whammo…you be illin’! You’re on your way to the anals of NJ dorkdom. That’s right, I typed anals. All you need now is to have The Sexy Armpit loaded up on Safari on your iPhone and you’ll be official.

Run DMC has made a huge impact on not only hip hop, but rock music as well. There’s a film about Run DMC’s career in production, and one half of the group stars in his own cable TV series. The reality show about Joseph Simmons, aka Reverend Run, has aired on VH1 since 2005. Parts of VH1’s Run’s House is filmed at his actual house in Saddle River, New Jersey. Merely a 20 minute drive from there, Darryl “DMC” McDaniels resides in Wayne, NJ.

*Greg Epstein’s store on Zazzle also features this t-shirt design in New York, Boston, and Chi-Town variants.

The Sexy Armpit’s “We Can Make a Difference” Campaign Phase 1

You know something…F–K politics! Aren’t you fed up with this country’s total lack of focus on what’s really important? This is why I’ve decided to lay out my plan which is a complete overhaul of this country. My plan will put this country on a spin cycle, and I can assure you I WILL NOT FORGET THE FABRIC SOFTENER!

Are you at all surprised by McGreevy’s 3-ways, rest stop romps, or “Friday night specials”??? Think about it, Spitzer’s so desperate he needs to hire a prostitute to get a BJ? Wait, desperate isn’t even the proper word, he spent over $4,000 to get some action! Not to mention that the action was from a Jersey girl, talk about a waste of funds! That’s a fortune to some people and he spent it on something the majority of us halfway decent looking guys with average brain power could get after spending the night in any dive bar around the country (especially in Jersey!) His successor Patterson is such a scared pansy that he spilled all so they don’t catch him in a lie. What more can come out in the media each day? Each story released spurs further dirt on candidates and politicians that truly have nothing to do with the war in Iraq, health care, or the apparent recession. All these smutty stories do is divert our attention from examining the true problems this country has.

I’m so fed up with the direction this country is going. I’m angry that our media decides to focus on everything BUT the important issues at hand. Why do we care if Bill Clinton had a side piece? Are we that gullible to believe he was the first politician to do that? How come the guys only get called out on it? Talk about a sexist world! It would really make my day if Spitzer announced he was divorcing his wife for being a dried up old hag with no sexual interest in favor of running off with his 22 year old, 105 lb prostitute…that little hot bitch. All men want is to have a woman who brings some lust and excitement to the bedroom department. For some reason, the guys that go into politics aren’t typically Ambercrombie models. Most of these guys grew up with a chip on their shoulders because they couldn’t get laid, and now that they have some notoriety they use it to their advantage whether gay or straight.

This country is in denial! It needs to sit down on a couch with a therapist just like Tony Soprano did. If the rough, tough, and macho mob boss Tony Soprano could sit down with a therapist then why the hell can’t the United States? America has lost it’s focus, it’s ignoring the real issues, and frankly it’s got a real addiction to Hollywood gossip. That’s gotta stop!

As for my grassroots campaign, my candidate will use Jem and the HologramsWe Can Make a Difference” as his campaign song. My candidate will fight every battle with fierce patriotism and the values the country was founded on. Where the hell did our pride go? Remember all that Red, White, and Blue that was splattered all over your town about 6 or 7 years ago? That 9/11 rallying seemed to disappear not too long afterward. Jem will assure the country that our new candidate can and WILL make a difference!

Let me go over a few of the Policies of the the ideal candidate. The first policy my candidate ratifies will be replacing the House of Representatives with “The Secretaries of State.” The Secretaries of State will comprise of women, celebrities or well known female personalities who will serve as the spokesperson for each state. For instance, Eva Longoria will be the representative for Texas since she is from Texas. Each secretary would obviously have no responsibilities since they would merely be figureheads associated with tourism and sports teams. People will automatically think of the representative of the state when they think of that specific state. Most likely you’ll see them on T-shirts in airport gift shops. As an example, the Texas shirt features Eva Longoria all sweaty and dirty in a camouflage bikini, a machine gun and a bandanna. The shirt reads “Don’t Mess With Texas.” That’ll definitely be a top seller.

My new Secretarial program will also integrate political commentary into shows like Extra and Access Hollywood. It will in turn give us all a reason to watch those boring ass political shows on Sunday morning. Featured each week as guest hosts will be different Secretaries of state wowing us with their comprehensive, educated, answers and lightning fast responses to hard pressing, hot button issues. How will that miracle of modern science be accomplished? Easy! A small microchip implanted in their ears will send them transmissions from Washington D.C feeding them exactly what to say! Only Jack Bauer is in on the secret. This measure will prevent stuff like THIS from happening:

I personally believe that U.S. Americans are unable to do so because, uhmmm, some people out there in our nation don’t have maps and uh, I believe that our, I, education like such as uh, South Africa, and uh, the Iraq, everywhere like such as, and I believe that they should, uhhh, our education over here in the US should help
the US, uh, should help South Africa, it should help the Iraq and the Asian
countries so we will be able to build up our future, for us.”

There will be hott calendars featuring the secretaries on sale in gift shops and Spencer’s everywhere. Half the proceeds of all “Secretaries” merch will go to the government, in order to offset the ass rape of taxes we receive all year long. I won’t rule out action figures, playsets, and thongs either. Think of how easy for us guys to remember…oh ok, “Angelina Jolie” represents California! “What’s the capital of California? Who gives a fuck! I know who the secretary is, and I can name all the films she appeared nude in! Isn’t that enough dammit! That’s enough politics for one day!” Even young students will find it advantageous to memorize each states representative. Many young boys will have their first wet dream thanks to California. “Mommy, I can’t seem to remember the representative of California, can we discuss her more thoroughly and purchasing her complete filmography on iTunes might jog my memory”
The sexy Secretaries would meet in the House of Representatives when they have their bi-annual (its not called “bi” for nothing (wink, nudge) lingerie pillow fight. Lots of important issues will be voted on afterward like who looked the hottest, who can get the most applause, and who should take their top off. There’s also the much anticipated annual Chili competition. No, it’s not what you think! The girls don’t put on chefs hats and cook up their own spicy, beany, meat stew. They all get put in a room in hot string bikinis where air jets are blasting ice cold frosty air. Whoever can stay in the room the longest without grabbing for stuff to keep them warm like a fur coat or thigh highs, will win the competition. Whoever has the most meat on her bones will have the edge. Just think…Hard Nipples for EVERYONE! Even though I’m not a necrophiliac, I’ve always thought blue lips were superhot.
Please join us tomorrow for the outline of Phase II of The Sexy Armpit’s “We Can Make a Difference” campaign 2008!

Jay’s Christmas Playlist 2005

It’s been a while. School’s been kicking my ass. Finals are coming up next week. Can’t wait to be done with this semester. I have 3 finals to go! After my computer crashed AGAIN yesterday I am fuming, but I have my wonderful girlfriend and my f’n amazing collection of Christmas songs to ease my sorrow. If you’re sick of hearing Mariah Carey’s All I want for Christmas is Poo, then here is my guide to Holiday Audio Enjoyment. With the YULE LOGS getting bigger and bigger with each passing day I figured I would mention a few Christmas songs that I HIGHLY recommend downloading these “podtastic” songs if you already don’t own them:

Things I Want by Sum 41 & Tenacious D
Christmas Is All Around Us – Love Actually soundtrack
Yellin’ At the Christmas Tree – Billy Idol
Back Door Santa – Bon Jovi
This Christmas – Christina Aguilera
I Wanna Rock You Hard This Christmas – The Dan Band (Old School)
Father Christmas – Lit
R2 D2 We Wish You A Merry Christmas – Meco
Oi To The World – NO DOUBT
Punk Rock Christmas – The Ravers
My Christmas List – Simple Plan
Rockin’ Christmas Time – 40 Foot Ringo
Mele Kalikimaka – Bing Crosby
Merry Christmas – Marvelous 3
Christmas Vacation – Mavis Staples
Merry Christmas Everybody – Rooney
Last Christmas – George Michael
The Phil Spector Album
Merry Christmas Baby – Springsteen
Let it Snow, Let it Snow, Let it Snow! – Dean Martin
Wonderful Christmastime – Paul McCartney
Christmas Wrapping – The Waitresses
Christmas in Hollis – Run DMC
and one of my all time FAVORITES: All Alone On Christmas – Darlene Love – ONE OF THE BEST!!!
Merry Christmas and post any others that are your favorites or you think I should have listed!!! This is not a complete list by any means!