See You at The Crossroads SCREECH!

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When I think of an evening of stand-up comics, Screech Powers from Saved By The Bell isn’t the first guy to pop in my mind. Among making a fairly long string of really bad movies (and dabbling in porn), Dustin Diamond, who had his 15 minutes playing the geek on Saved By The Bell, has been doing stand-up comedy for the last couple of years. If you’re in the area and you know all the episodes of Saved By The Bell, you can catch Dustin Diamond do his stand-up routine at the Crossroads in Garwood, NJ this Saturday July 20th.
I never had any type of personal vendetta against Dustin like many people do for some reason, but I doubt I would actually go to see him perform despite the title of this post. Surprisingly, appearing on Hulk Hogan’s Celebrity Championship Wrestling and naming his band Salty the Pocketknife don’t qualify as his biggest offenses. What bothers me most is his mid-90s style “I’m trying to be a comedian” head shot used on the left side of the promotional poster above. I truly hope he didn’t pay someone to pose him and snap that photo for him. If he did, then this post is dedicated to the low budget photographer he used. He should incorporate this ridiculous photo and his silly pose into his comedy act.
3 other comedians will also be appearing: Joe Carney, Big Rich from Jersey, and Zack Bratkovich
Tickets are $15 bucks and can be bought here:
78 North Avenue
Garwood, NJ

Lipstick and Cigarettes at The Crossroads in Garwood NJ


On Saturday night February 18th, The Sexy Armpit along with our featured writer Nick “NJ” Holden inhaled some delicious pop rock that was coated in a sweet new wave glaze and dusted with crunchy grooves. Sound good? Well, I’m lying. Dessert wasn’t a priority for us at The Crossroads in Garwood that night, it was actually Lipstick and Cigarettes, the new wave inspired pop rock band.

Surprisingly, out of all the music venues I’ve been to throughout NJ, this was my first time at The Crossroads. I discovered that they serve a TALL, ice cold, Red Bull and vodka. If you’re like me and get tired when you stay up passed 10pm, that’s the drink for you. “It’s 10 pm, do you know where your children are?” MY MOM: “Why yes I do, my son The Sexy Armpit is at The Crossroads in Garwood passed out at a table but not from alcohol, it’s just because he gets sleepy.” Once the band hit the stage at around 10:45, I no longer needed the liquid crack because tunes like “White Tie Affair,”and “Automatic” energized the heck out of me and so did their shout out to The Sexy Armpit! Thanks guys!

This was the band’s last show of the winter and I’m glad I got to check them out once again. Clad in an outfit straight out of GQ, frontman Chris Orsi’s lively mood was contagious. Erik’s drum beats kept me well stimulated. Also elevating the crowd was bassist Sara who was having a blast on stage and could not stop smiling in between songs. Maybe it’s because of the rumors I’ve heard about a keytar being incorporated into their repertoire very soon? Hopefully one day we’ll see Lipstick and Cigarettes “play the keytar on the MTV!”

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Also check out iTunes to download Lipstick and Cigarettes brand new EP!