NJ Transit Window Display In NY Penn Station

[youtube http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uKusia1m2BE?rel=0]

November is Model Railroad Month! Lots of kids and adults alike are getting ready to set up their toy trains for the holidays. Until then, check out the above video that I filmed back in the summer while waiting for a train at New York Penn Station. This window display is on the NJ Transit side and it’s pretty damn cool, especially if you’re a fan of Jersey history or just dig cool window displays. I never thought I’d see such a tribute to New Jersey in New York Penn Station but it’s actually right there near the waiting area so you can witness it for yourself the next time you are there, OR just watch this video! Of course, it’s not a traditional model train set, but since it’s the work of NJ Transit this will serve as our observation of Model Railroad Month!

New Jersey’s Great Pop Culture Moments Vol.37: The Taking of Pelham 1 2 3

The 2009 remake of The Taking of Pelham 1 2 3, has a New Jersey in-joke. Travolta’s subway hijaking character Ryder becomes very defensive when dispatcher Walter Garber (Denzel Washington) makes a punchline out of The Garden State. In reality, Travolta was born in Englewood, New Jersey. In an ironic twist, the film also stars Jersey born Tony Soprano himself, James Gandolfini as the Mayor of New York City!

new york,new jersey,denzel,travolta
Ryder and Garber

RYDER: “Yeah well you know, you live, you die, you either go with the current or you fight it, but you all wind up in the same place”
WALTER GARBER: “Where’s that, Jersey?”
RYDER: “Yeah you watch it, I was born there man.”

New Jersey has the Worst Drivers in the Country!

At least we don’t have to wonder anymore if we were being needlessly persecuted. It’s for real. New Jersey has the WORST DRIVERS in the United States! According to a GMAC Insurance survey, which by the way was unscientific, New Jersey came in LAST PLACE with a mind boggling score of 69.9! With a score like that it’s no wonder what people are thinking of while driving of instead of the road. I feel like this epiphany has added to the solidification of New Jersey as possibly the most retarded state in the country. Thanks to all the morons on the roads in N.J, we all have to pay the highest car insurance rates in the country. A word to the mutants who took this incriminating survey: STOP taking these damn surveys because it’ll only show your stupidity and make NJ look worse! And for the honor of Grayskull please stop driving like an ass or take the f’n train! 69.9…leave it to N.J!

Bathrooms Rock

Lately when I sit on the toilet and take a crap, I am overwhelmed by a sense of appreciation for modern plumbing and bathrooms. Recently I was on the NJ transit train heading toward NY Penn Station. I had to pee really bad. I forgot that there was a bathroom on the train so I took the chance.

Even though if I would have peed myself it wouldnt have mattered cause it looked like a lot of the people on the train had done the same thing. Suddenly, my nostrils were struck by the foulest odor. It was impervious. I could not handle the odor. My mission was to urinate as fast as possible while trying not to inhale the mixture of all the previous visitors shit/fart/piss/puke smells. I peed while holding my shirt over my nose and avoiding making eye contact with all of the stuff that missed the aluminum bowl. I got more nauseated as my liquid fell into some sort of brownish orange goo that resided there. My regurgitation was really close to joining the rest of the crew to hang out. Luckily i was finished. I got the hell out of there.

It’s always funny when you come out of public bathroom and you think that the next person that goes in there is gonna think that YOU made the stench, or the mess. Not true. Always give them the benefit of the doubt. An example is the bathrooms at college. In between English classes I have to take leaks. I look down past my junk to the urinal and see on the sides of the bowl part – long ass pubes. WHO THE HELL are these morons whose pubes fall off and decide to perch themselves on the bowl of the urinal. Mind you that they dont fall in the water, its the part above it, like the ledge. Most important – we are in a technologically advanced 21st century…why do guys have huge bushes? Guys shouldnt have pubes that are as long as my middle finger. That is fucking disgusting. Shave your fucking bush down you fucking psychos. And stop yanking your pubes while using the urinal.

Finally, modern day bathrooms RULE. They are amazing. They are the “shit.” We don’t realize how good we have it. Ever use a Johnny on the spot? Or a Portosan? It’s like the outhouses people had in the old days. There was odors, flies, and other people’s excrement. Let’s be thankful that we can shit in a peaceful, nurturing environment. We even have spray to wipe out the odors. It’s grand.

So, it’s all good. Thank God for modern bathrooms, cause without them I wouldnt be able to laugh so much when my shit is too big to flush down the shoot. It acts like its holding on for dear life, fighting the supreme suction. It just does not want to get devoured by the abyss. I don’t blame the shit. The shit finally gets out into the open and then gets sucked away. Shit doesnt have a very long life. It’s kinda like Boba Fett and the great Pit of Carkoon from Return of the Jedi.