It’s nearly impossible to keep track of the sizzling love affair between Batman and the Mistress of the Night, Nocturna. Seriously people! In our last post they were just fighting over a Robin costume at a Halloween store! And now these two crazy kids are passionately sucking face on the cover of Detective Comics #556 from way back in November of 1985!
All I know is, if DC Comics ever released one of those Fabio type romance novels, then the cover would be exactly the same as the one on this issue! The cover art is truly fantastic with a very detailed version of the quintiessential ’80s Batman sticking his tongue down this goth bitch Nocturna’s throat. Makes me want to do it too. Good for him. Every guy has a fetish. At the time Batman was into thieving, underhanded goth chicks.
The skies are pouring with red rain and Nocturna’s babbling on about the night being “raped.” What the hell is going on? I’m convinced that this has to be the Anne Rice version of Batman. Then Jason Todd is having his little Oedipus complex with Nocturna. Heck, I probably would too, look at her cleavage! You know she’s sitting like that on purpose! And keep in mind BLOOD droplets are falling onto her ghostly white skin! It probably looked like a bomb pop when the red part started melting and dripping onto the white middle part. Yummy! Lick it up. It’s only right now!
Look at the way her legs are wrapped around that rope! Makes me feel kinda funny. Hey Papparazzi…where are you when we need some Nocturna upskirts? Who gives a shit about Lindsay Lohan? Where are those damn photographers when we have some real business to take care of? We have a certified klepto-goth hybrid chick with a hot bod climbing a friggin’ rope with her dress flailing all over the place and no photographers to be found. Useless creeps!
Whoa, wait a minute…was this Detective Comics or an episode of Passions? How does Batman even put up with her absurd rhetoric? Nocturna’s clearly only good for one thing: making out!