November 2008 - Page 3 of 3

Atomic Food Containers – Perfect for Leftover Eaters in New Jersey

Posted on November 10, 2008 by sexyarmpit

You know those catalogs that come in the mail that feature every variation of the leg lamp from A Christmas Story? It turns out that the What On Earth catalog is one of them. They also feature a whole lot of other junk you’ll probably never use, but sure looks damn cool while you’re thumbing through the catalog. Doesn’t everyone need a silky Rocky Balboa robe just like the one he walked to the ring in? You can recreate his bout against Clubber Lang only in a much crappier way. Your bed can be the ring and your pillow can be Clubber Lang. (Not that I’ve ever had any experiences similar to that or anything, I’m just saying) I don’t think “boxing buddies” ever existed to compete with “wrestling buddies,” but if they did I would buy up an army of Clubber Lang’s. I like my pillow replicas of boxers to be pretty badass what can I say? He pillows the fool.

After that arduous exhibition bout against Clubber Lang, you’re sure to work up a fierce appetite. Time to make a masculine, easy to prepare, yet satisfying meal such as chili. What should you do with the huge 20 gallon vat of chili sitting on the stove that you don’t want to throw away? Well, if you happen to live in New Jersey then these Atomic Food Containers are perfect to store your leftovers while managing to be tongue in cheek at the same time. How many Tupperware do you own at this second that you can say have a sense of humor? I know for a fact that none of my containers have any personality whatsoever. If you really want to let your wife know that her cooking sucks more than Peg Bundy’s, then these may just be the way to go. Although you might want to present her with them BEFORE the holidays that way you don’t have to experience her “raisin liverwurst surprise upside down cake.”

What On Earth doesn’t sponsor this site, but I thought these were bizarre and appropriate enough to mention regardless. The set of 3 containers feature these labels: Nuclear Waste – Eat and Glow. Biodangerous – Yesterday’s Leftovers. Experimental Meal – Consume at Own Risk.

Supreme Snack Serenity

Posted on November 7, 2008 by sexyarmpit

Some people consider inhaling the cold, crisp, fresh air after hiking up a mountain invigorating. Others find a day at the spa for a deep tissue massage rejuvenating. When you’re dealing with a low expectations motherf–ker such as myself, a bag of Combos squirted with a new flavor is quite a magnificent experience. The odds of actually enjoying the new flavor variety joining the Combo ranks was 3,720 to 1. Usually with any new flavor of any type of food, i’m left disappointed after realizing that it’s nowhere near as good as the hype lead me to believe. In this case, new Combos Zesty Salsa Tortilla flavor left me salivating for more.

I bought them to snack on while waiting for my flight to Orlando to board. I killed almost the entire bag! It seems pretty disgusting, I know, but I didn’t eat breakfast or lunch that day so it’s all good. The typical pretzel is replaced with a crunchy stone ground corn shell which surrounds an accurate and super tasty salsa filling. This new variety really expands on the idea of the traditional Combos and it’s sooo the right move. I guess what I’m trying to say is…if I can change, and Combos can change, everybody can change!

The festive special edition holiday versions of candy and other snacks have been hitting shelves for the past few weeks. Just last night at the local Wegman’s, I found these Giant Size JOLLY NERDS and they are ridiculously and phenomenally awesome. As if GIANT, and CHEWY didn’t sum it up adequately, JOLLY puts it over the top like Lincoln Hawk. I hope I sound like a cliched commercial when I say that these luscious, chewy, and jolly Nerds really burst with flavor. (understatement) The magic of this Wonka offering is that the crunchy outer NERD shell contrasts perfectly with the chewy center. Out of the holiday colors, I preferred the red NERD’s, but after you eat a bunch of them, it’s almost impossible to discern any differences between the red and green.

Here is my work of modern art which I call “NERDY Napkin Face.” He’s really that happy. There’s no signs of party pooper Pagliacci reflected in this piece of art. He’s not downtrodden because he’s being called a NERD! This piece of candy is clearly 100% JOLLY.

OK, so I’ll admit that I didn’t really make this piece of art myself. The NERDS came right out of the bag and danced around forming a smiley face on my napkin. They are that damn good. The only candy comparable to these are those gummy blackberries and raspberries. Now those are one of the few candies that I can overdose on! These NERDS are light years beyond them though. If only life was like the Jetsons and I could get an entire nutritious meal out of ONE CHEWY, JOLLY NERD! That would be some amazing feat! People would be dancing in the streets if they found out they only needed to eat a pellet of chewy, jolly NERDS in order to stay healthy. When it comes to the blissful, elated feeling that overcomes me after eating them, the chewy, Jolly NERDS are basically unparalleled.

On Halloween I Dressed To Kill

Posted on November 6, 2008 by sexyarmpit

I’m back from Disney World and I’ll definitely fill you in on the details of the trip within the next few days or so! I hope everyone enjoyed their Halloween extravaganzas! I must say, I had a lot of fun this year doing the countdown and getting my costume together. Thanks to everyone who stopped by and to all the awesome bloggers out there who put up killer posts throughout the entire month!

I’ve dressed up as Gene Simmons from KISS many times in the past, but this year I decided to get the group together and do a Dressed to Kill album cover theme. It’s always fun to dress up as The Demon because the women LOVE it and it’s pretty bad ass. Most of all, it’s fun because people are in awe and even a bit scared at the same time. If you aren’t familiar with KISS then the makeup is pretty menacing. The group went to terrorize The Breakfast Club in Old Bridge, NJ. Here are some pics taken on Halloween night:

Month: November 2008