Tawny Cypress is August’s Garden State Playmate

Posted on by sexyarmpit
heroes,tawny cypress,new jersey,point pleasant
When I first noticed Tawny Cypress on Heroes a few years ago, all I could think of was “There’s ANOTHER Tawny out there besides Tawny Kitaen?” Yes, it’s unfortunate, but I seriously thought that. Why should we all become more acquainted with Tawny Cypress? Unlike Kitaen, a typical California girl, Cypress hails from Point Pleasant, New Jersey and she’s appeared in an episode of one of the funniest shows ever, Stella. Perhaps she’s not as well known as Kitaen, but Cypress is exceedingly more sophisticated than a glorified hair metal groupie who made a habit of dancing on hoods of cars.

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Cypress has built up a strong TV background starring in All My Children, Third Watch, Law & Order: SVU, and recently Rescue Me, while Kitaen has had a publicized cocaine habit and an affinity for domestic violence. Possibly working against Cypress is the fact that she doesn’t have an ’80s classic starring Tom Hanks on her list of credits, (Bachelor Party!) Now raise your hands if you remember The NEW WKRP in Cincinnati? Great! All 2 of you remember that show! Ironically, Tawny Kitaen played Mona, the smarty pants nighttime DJ. Cypress may not be a future Nobel Prize nominee like Kitaen, but she can back up her habit of snagging intellectual roles since she’s studied at Boston University, Westminster Choir College in Princeton, and Mason Gross at Rutgers University.

Tawny Cypress’ character Simone did her damnedest to get her boyfriend Isaac Mendez into rehab for his heroin addiction in the first season of Heroes while Tawny Kitaen appeared on the 2nd season of VH1’s Celebrity Rehab with Dr. Drew. And once again, The Sexy Armpit poses the age old question to you, which are the more appealing qualities: class, sensuousness, and talent or starring in a RATT video and being a former love interest of O.J Simpson? You decide!

The Sexy Armpit appreciates Tawny Cypress for representing New Jersey! Not to take anything away from the lovely actress, but her brother is an accomplished comic book artist who has worked on Image Comics’ Jersey Gods! You can view his art right here at his blogspot page: http://tobycypress.blogspot.com
www.SexyArmpit.com

Hark the Hair Bands Sing!

Posted on by sexyarmpit

A friend of mine, Steve, once said that everything in my life ties back to Hair Bands. While my hair is the furthest thing from being “hair band” status, the hair band flavor runs deep within my soul. I don’t have much of a choice either because it’s something I grew up with. Hair Metal was all over MTV and on the radio when I was a kid. It just seemed like the culmination of pop and metal was a perfect mix. It was only an added bonus when they threw in the spandex, leather tassels, HUGE hair, and the uncomfortable closeups of the guys in the band creepily smiling at you through the television.

After years of being glued to MTV watching videos for hours, I’ve come to despise videos that have been made within the last ten years. The hair band video mentality was that of a party and the escapist themes sucked you right into the plot. Was Tawny Kitaen dancing for us? As far as I knew she was. Who cares if she was porking Coverdale. Was Bret Michaels a complete woman in the “I Want Action” video? Hell yes, but the guys weren’t paying attention to that because we actually rocked out to it. The women ate it up because for some reason women seem to be attracted to guys that look like women. Alas, it was a great time for music videos.

Nowadays I’d be hard pressed to find you a video that I actually enjoy unless its some wacky homage to the hair band era. The ones that are actually cool aren’t even shown on TV. If you have VH1 Classics you can catch alot of these bands, but I don’t have the time to watch for 18 hours to see the new Quiet Riot video. Luckily with the existence of official band websites, we can now enjoy great Hair Band videos online including the ones that are made TODAY!

If you like to dabble in the hair band scene, you must check out “Oh Come Oh ye Faithful,” the latest video from Twisted Sister which appears on their Christmas album. It hearkens back to the golden days of Hair Metal videos when no one gave a shit about anything but having a good time and checking out some hot ass. Whether you love the genre or not, the videos are completely over the top and much more entertaining than the majority of videos made in recent times.

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