Christmas 2015

This year it seemed like Christmas didn’t pack the wallop that the immense holiday usually does. Collectively, many of my friends on social media have confessed to not being into the holiday spirit this year. At least for me, it’s hard to come close to the highs of our Halloween celebration, but, just because it was an off year doesn’t mean we can’t at least wing it! I still listened to Christmas tunes all month long, ate several indulgent meals, and got a bunch of cool gifts. Since you probably don’t need to hear about my ingestion of 14 pounds of eggplant parmigiana and the scraps from my mother’s ridiculously good rainbow cookies, I’ll tell you all about some of the kickass stuff that magically appeared under my Christmas tree this year. Continue reading Christmas 2015

Halloween 2015: There Was So Much Stuff!

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There was so much stuff. That’s what I’ll remember most about Halloween 2015. That and the fact that “‘ween” and “15” rhyme made this such a memorable season. Of course there was the Sexy Armpit Halloween Special AND this year marked the beginning of The Purple Stuff Podcast. Can we pile on anymore stuff?

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Think about it, grocery stores had aisles of limited edition Halloween cereal and candy packed from floor to ceiling! We saw BK’s Halloween Whoppers, Krispy Kreme donuts, Pumpkin Spice Twinkies, and spooky 7-11 cups. What’s crazier is that I didn’t even name half the stuff you probably bought on a whim at Target! Starbucks even jumped into the game with their release of A FRIGGIN’ COUNT FRAPPULA FRAPPUCCINO…wha-what? There was just so much that the sheer amount of Halloween spirit was awe inspiring. It was like Christmas morning for Halloween lovers for like 2 months straight. While in the midst of the season it may have been hard to process all this, but after the fog juice clears, it’s easy to see that Halloween 2015 was completely nuts in all the right ways.

I’m not sure if I’m rationalizing this or not, but think about it: quantity was the underlying theme this year. I’ve already touched on the amount of food and snack gimmicks that we were bestowed with, but what about everything else? In terms of my own little universe, our Halloween Special was an anthology, so you wound up getting THREE mini stories in one episode. It was pretty epic for us. Premiering a couple of weeks after our special was the anthology Tales of Halloween, with more stories crammed into it than I thought was humanly possible. We also saw the arrival of the long anticipated graphic novel Trick ‘r Treat: Days of the Dead which tipped the scales at heavy 144 pages! I’m here to urge you to reflect back and marvel at just how colossal this Halloween really was. I for one am still basking in its glow.

We had so much of the good ol’ BOO and yes, we know about the green POO, but I’m certainly not complaining. Monster Cereals were back in such a big way that they had various types of boxes to collect. You could even build a freaking mansion out of some of them! I still cannot believe that I have a Monster Cereal Mansion in my living room, as Old Man Parker would say, “…it’s indescribably beautiful!”

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What’s Halloweenier than a Jack O’ Lantern vomiting Spinach Artichoke Dip for all to enjoy? I took this shot at the Carnival of Shadows Masquerade at Trenton Artworks 10/24/15

This Halloween was awesome. I’m not merely listing all the crap that came out this season, but it’s important to mark this Halloween season as one that felt like it wasn’t a struggle to be a Halloween fan. When every company is slapping their products with limited edition labels and squirting them with pumpkin spice magic and ghost shapes, that is always accepted in my world. And while I’m on the subject of my world, last year for the masquerades I attended, I wore the same costume twice. This year, I somehow managed to conjure up 2 different costumes for the parties I went to. Double the work, but double the fun. Where are those More twins from The Final Chapter?

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Here I am as the Kenner Grim Reaper Action Figure from the Bill and Ted’s Excellent Adventure line which I wore to the Trenton Artworks Carnival of Shadows Masquerade party. As the story typically goes, this costume was on my short list of ideas every Halloween, so it was awesome to finally get to do it. Of course, no one knew who I was supposed to be and I was 100% expecting that. I don’t create these costumes to get a rise out of people, if that was the case there’s so many obvious costume choices in the Spirit Halloween store that I could easily go out and buy. Nothing made me happier than to see friends on social media totally geek out at this. That’s why I enjoy participating in social media, because in my real life nobody sees the cool factor in dressing up as an obscure Kenner action figure. They’re missing out and they can go back to gawking at some HILARIOUS guy who bought the Caitlyn Jenner costume. “Hey Henry, can you believe how creative Todd is in that Caitlyn Jenner costume…oh he’s always the life of the party!”

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These Pumpkin decorations hanging from the ceiling really manage to add that extra old school flair to an otherwise lame Halloween party. We made our own fun anyway.

On Halloween night, we played it low key, but still went out to a local establishment for a Halloween party. It wasn’t much of a Halloween party since about 60% of the joint was NOT in costume, unless everyone was dressed in that classic “Miserable, Middle-Aged Drunk” costume. I think Ben Cooper manufactured that at one point. Seriously, a Halloween party is not a Halloween party without the costumes. At least we know where not to go next year. The place had a couple of saving graces though. First, the ’80s cover band was pretty decent and their female lead singer was dressed as Big Bird, so yeah, that was surreal and right up my alley. Then, when I went to find the bathroom, I saw their elaborate Halloween decorations which I spent about 20 minutes Instagramming. No one knew where I was for a while. At one point, a twenty-something girl stopped me, grabbed my arms, stared at me and said to me in a very serious tone, “You are scarier than any of these Halloween decorations.” I chuckled like a big doof and said ‘Thanks, you look pretty scary yourself” which was a joke that I don’t think landed properly since she was in a Cinderella costume. She gave me a dirty look. It was fine nonetheless because, as I was walking into the bathroom, I heard a noise and looked back to see that she stumbled over her own feet, fell into the exit doors, and face-planted on the pavement outside. She was a little tipsy, but don’t worry, her friends were there to assist her. She was A-OK as she awaited her Pumpkin carriage and/or Uber.

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On Halloween night I dressed up as Alice Cooper in a straight jacket, which is based off of a portion of his live concert spectacle. Miss Sexy Armpit did a badass job on my wig and makeup too. In comparison to previous costume help that I’ve enlisted her for, this one was pretty easy for her. I got a lot of compliments and it was fun to be Alice for a night, especially since it was another costume that I had been meaning to do for several years. Miss Sexy Armpit was WWE Superstar, and one of my personal favorites, Paige. I even noticed a guy in a Bubba Ray Dudley costume walk in and he and I immediately gravitated to each other because wrestling fans just do that. It’s like, “hey, you’re weird like me! let’s talk about pro-wrestling in public fairly audibly as if it’s a real sanctioned sport!” Later in the night they rolled back over with their new friend STING! It was a who’s who of the WWE.

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I recall a few Halloween’s in recent memory where I almost felt guilty for celebrating as hardcore as I do, but this season, all the binging on Halloween was perfectly acceptable. It feels like Halloween is truly getting to a point that it demands more respect as a bonafide holiday. Usually, Halloween gets curb stomped by Christmas way too soon, but not this year. Thanksgiving and Christmas felt like they swooped in at a strangely appropriate time. Is this all just me? Am I officially taking crazy pills? I know I was taking Hallocor in the Halloween Special, so maybe I’m still on a bender? All I know is, I never give up on Halloween, it possesses me all year long.

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I hope you enjoyed your Halloween season! Did you dress up in a cool costume? What was your favorite part of Halloween 2015? Leave us a comment! Thank you for reading and celebrating with us!