NJ Archives - Page 11 of 11

Castle Dracula Was My Jam

Posted on October 22, 2013 by sexyarmpit

[youtube http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5eQG_J2yQ5s]

Growing up, a lot of my friends would brag about exotic vacations lasting several weeks that they went on every summer. I was never jealous of them because my family went to the Jersey Shore every summer, more specifically, Wildwood. If you remember the Santa Cruz scenes in The Lost Boys, the type of vibe happening on the Wildwood Boardwalk wasn’t too much different, and of course…all the damn vampires!

Although I enjoyed going to Wildwood immensely, I think I took many aspects of it for granted since the majority of my attention span was spent on daydreaming about Castle Dracula. Then, once I was actually on the boardwalk and in close proximity of the sinister fortress, I’d spend the next few minutes walking slowly toward the ornate Castle, spending every moment in awe of the dread it beamed up and down the boardwalk. For me, Castle Dracula was a mecca.

Aside from some funny stories at the local restaurant The Captain’s Table with my sister and my cousins, my main memories are of anticipating, and finally getting to go into Castle Dracula. When my sister was younger and more brave, she would come with me as we both had a blast getting the bejesus scared out of us. Of course there was boardwalk games, prizes, ice cream, and boogie boarding, but none of it was ever high on my priority list.

Once inside that Castle, my mind was in utter disbelief that I was actually about to experience my favorite haunted attraction again, and it was all located right in Jersey. Although I loved Disneyland and Disney World, I didn’t need to, nor did I get the opportunity to go to Disney every year like some of my friends. A lot of them seemed like they didn’t truly appreciate how grandiose their trips seemed to other kids who weren’t as lucky. Now, I’m so not implying that I was “less fortunate,” because that would be ri-f*cking-diculous. I was overjoyed to walk the boardwalk, fantasizing about one of the greatest dark rides the Jersey Shore has ever offered. It felt like it was there for me, and it was…for a long time.

Castle Dracula burned down in 2002.

Check out Matt’s amazing tribute from the X-E days:

http://www.x-entertainment.com/articles/0940/

And Dark in the Park’s got cool stuff about it as well:

http://www.darkinthepark.com/Dracula/cdHome/cdhome.htm

NJ T-Shirt Tuesday 110: Great Adventure’s Fright Fest

Posted on October 16, 2013 by sexyarmpit

This year’s edition of Six Flags Fright Fest T-Shirt and Hoodie offerings

Amusement Parks and Halloween always make a great combination. Thrill rides in the chilled night air, and goofing around with your friends usually leads me to feel like there’s a horror movie plot being created in there somewhere. Whether there’s a killer lurking in the park or some supernatural entity is haunting one of the attractions, the Halloween season is prime time to head to your nearest amusement park and experience the fun of the season. We’re spoiled in Jersey because every year Six Flags Great Adventure becomes infested with ghosts, zombies, crazy clowns, and vampires for their annual Fright Fest celebration. Just remember to get there early. We didn’t.

Fright Fest is an annual thing for us, but we usually wind up getting on one ride if we’re lucky. The lines are super insane during Fright Fest, and the park is probably even more packed than it would be in the middle of the summer. Difference is, that it’s nicer to wait in lines and get on rides when it’s not a sweltering 97 degrees in the shade and over one hundred percent humidity.

Weather-wise, Saturday night was perfect. I was with a bunch of great people and even though we only made it on one ride, we had a blast. I’m sure it would’ve been more fun if the lines for the actual Fright Fest attractions weren’t as long. Even the average wait time for a roller coaster was an hour. While waiting in excruciatingly long lines, it helps to cling to the hope that the ride actually doesn’t break down before you make it to the last section of the line queue.

Fortunately, the ride we did decide to wait for went smoothly. Skull Mountain didn’t take that long to get through the line, probably because it’s one of the tamer rides, so we were patient. It fit into the Fright Fest theme as well. For an older, less face melting type of ride, this one still holds up after all these years. Think of it as Six Flag’s answer to Space Mountain only with a theme on the exterior that brings to mind The Goonies, King Kong, or a pirate movie.

We were required to buy separate tickets for the haunted attractions, so we did that online at home to save a couple of bucks. Next we had to wait on another long line just to show them our print-outs to get a wristband for the haunts. This was just becoming an abysmal LINE FEST. Then we would have to wait on more laughable lines for each individual haunt. Fed up by this point, I started asking the lady a few questions about the attractions.

I was disappointed to learn that all of the attractions were walk through trails featuring live actors. I wasn’t hoping for dead actors, I was just hoping for a good old fashioned haunted house or dark ride type situation. They should mix it up and offer half walk throughs and at least one or two haunted houses that remind you of an old dark ride. I can’t tell you how many times Six Flags has sent me e-mails asking for feedback regarding my last visit to Fright Fest and I wrote them a hundred times that Fright Fest needs a good old fashioned, boardwalk style haunted house. It shouldn’t only be for Fright Fest either, it should be open year round for all of us psychos to enjoy.

We played the boardwalk and carnival games they have in the Psycho Circus area.

Miss Sexy Armpit won me a Slimer plush! Dinosaur Dracula and Freddy in Space also won

Slimers as well only Dino Drac’s is darker shade of green than this one. I opted for the brighter one since it seemed like it was glowing like the real Slimer. The vintage melted plastic pumpkin decoration has absolutely nothing to do with Six Flags Great Adventure. Slimer is petrified of him though, and he should be, since he’s creepy as hell.

In the late ’70s, Great Adventure’s Haunted Castle was the type of attraction we needed until arsonists supposedly burned it down in ’84, killing eight teenagers trapped inside. Maybe they feel like it’s a curse if they build another one? I can’t say for sure, but maybe they fell that they aren’t experts at subtly, they prefer spending millions to create the fastest, most cheek rippling coasters the world has ever seen. Nothing wrong with that. The thing is, Great Adventure is already fully stocked with thrill rides and there’s a new one on the way for next season. Another thrill ride is superfluous, again, we need a damn haunted DARK RIDE. Attention to detail is preferred.

Keeping with the resoundingly positive note I am on, the graphic on this year’s Six Flags Great Adventure Fright Fest shirts and hoodies are AWESOME. They did get this part of the celebration correct. Apparel graphics are always a big part of the experience. You must be able to properly commemorate your visit and this year Six Flags came up with a couple of really cool looking designs. I couldn’t exit the park without snapping a few shots. America loves zombies…and paying lots of money to wait on never-ending lines apparently.

The Monstrous Miniature Glowing Golf Experience in Edison, NJ

Posted on October 14, 2013 by sexyarmpit

Yup, now you know you’re in New Jersey…

Aside from New Jersey pop culture, there aren’t many things that The Sexy Armpit is an expert at, that is, except playing mini-golf in a black-lit room full of crazy incandescent murals and animatronic monsters. Monster Mini Golf is to thank for bringing us this experience and in this post we will take a look at some of the New Jersey themed murals on the walls in the Edison, NJ location.

Several years ago, when Monster Mini Golf opened in Fairfield, NJ, they were gracious enough to have us out for a round of mini-golf. They also hooked us up with a few passes for a giveaway which was very cool of them.

Hopewell Valley is a group of communities in Mercer County, NJ

I immediately fell in love with the concept of Monster Mini-Golf, since mini-golf is actually one thing I’m good at and thoroughly enjoy. I despise regular golf, so please don’t invite me on one of your ridiculously expensive “outings.”

As if Monster Mini Golf couldn’t be more up my alley, a few years ago KISS announced a partnership with the company. Located in Las Vegas, KISS Monster Mini Golf is just as awesome as the other locations, but if you’re a KISS fan it’s euphoric. Non-stop KISS music blasts as you make your way through the rounds which include giant KISS boots and a finale involving Gene’s tongue (naturally). KISS memorabilia adorns the walls and there’s even a KISS shop where you can buy all kinds of KISS stuff. I’ve been there twice and I would take up residence there if I could.

Christie Street in Edison was the first street in the world to use electric light bulbs for illumination

Since Fairfield is a little bit of drive for us, I was excited when Monster Mini Golf announced a couple of new locations close by a few years ago. After visiting the location in Edison, NJ a few times, I must commend the company for the theme running through the murals on the walls.

Monster Mini Golf pays Thomas Edison a tribute in this mural also featuring George Lucas

Monster Golf’s murals usually include their original characters, but this time they incorporated a local motif. The Fairfield location had a zombie Bruce Springsteen, but that was nothing compared to the several New Jersey references that appear on the walls in Edison, and if you’re perceptive you’ll certainly notice them.

Most prominently was the fact that the location is in Edison, NJ, a town named for Thomas Edison, “The Wizard of Menlo Park.” The impact of that probably gets lost on the youth of today, but I always find it amazing that one of the most famous inventors of all time and a pioneer of things we use in everyday life is from the local Sexy Armpit Area. People like me, voracious consumers of media, have a lot to thank Thomas Edison for. He’s responsible for the record player, the movie camera, and the practical electric light bulb.

In addition to Thomas Edison, another notable Edison native, Susan Sarandon, appears in a mural as well. With a mini Frank-n-Furter doll, this art brings to mind Sarandon’s starring role in the Rocky Horror Picture Show, one of my favorite traditions not only during October, but year round. Above catch a glimpse of a green version of October 2010’s Garden State Playmate.

The Night He Came Home…to South Jersey

Posted on October 11, 2013 by sexyarmpit

It would be preposterous for me to go around posting sensational claims like “every state has an Empire State Building,” or “every state has a St. Louis Arch,” but it’s totally NOT out of the question to say that “Every town has an Elm Street,” because so many towns actually do. Freddy Krueger made that claim in his sixth film, but I can’t seem to recall Michael Myers ever boasting that “All states have a Haddonfield,” and even if he did, it would be completely unfounded.

Haddonfield is a well known town amongst the horror community for being the serene suburb of Illinois where Michael Myers went on a murderous rampage. Although the movie was filmed in California and set in Illinois, the real Haddonfield is in New Jersey, and it served as the inspiration for the town’s name.

Haddonfield would probably be relatively unknown town to the rest of the nation if it weren’t for the film’s co-writer and co-producer, the late Debra Hill, who was born there. Hill and John Carpenter worked on several films together including the first 3 Halloween movies. Hill, who at one time was romantically linked to Carpenter, grew up a mere 10 minutes away in Philadelphia, PA.

If you’ve been to the Monster Mania Convention in Cherry Hill, you’ve probably seen the signs in that area for the real Haddonfield. If you were second guessing yourself by saying “Nah, Halloween was in Illinois…” then technically you are correct, but just keep in mind that Illinois is about 700 some odd miles away from the real Haddonfield! That said, New Jersey doesn’t have sour grapes about the film being set in another state because Haddonfield is already known for another monster, the Hadrosaurus Foulkii. Haddy was the first in-tact dinosaur skeleton ever found and put on display, which is friggin’ cool. What town wouldn’t want their own dinosaur?

Dinosaurs aside, off the top of my head, New Jersey can lay claim to Jason Voorhees, The Toxic Avenger, Vera Farmiga (Norma Bates FTW!) and the inspiration for the setting of Halloween. Knowing that so much of the basis of many classic horror films are rooted in New Jersey is pretty incredible. I think trivia like this is awesome because of how obscure it is. If you’re not a big fan of the Halloween franchise, you might have been unaware of the fact that Debra Hill infused a little bit of South Jersey into Halloween.

In honor of its 35th anniversary, you can catch the original Halloween as it returns to theaters for special screenings around the country. In addition, both Halloween 4 and 5 will also be screened. Check ScreenVision.com for a full list of screenings in your area.

Other sites of interest:

Fictional Entry for Haddonfield on Horror Movies Wiki: http://horror-movies.wikia.com/wiki/Haddonfield,_Illinois

Coldwell Banker mentions the Halloween connection to NJ from a real estate perspective:

http://blog.coldwellbanker.com/the-original-halloween-home-of-michael-myers/

Official Site of the Hadrosaurus Foulkii: http://hadrosaurus.com

Official Haddonfield Website: http://www.haddonfieldnj.org/

Real Ghostbusters Ride Into A Ghost Town…in NEW JERSEY!

Posted on October 3, 2013 by sexyarmpit

New York and Chicago are home to many of history’s “mainstream” mobsters. The fact is though, the mafia has always been heavily attached to New Jersey culture as well. Even if you weren’t aware of that, The Sopranos helped further cement it (cement shoes style) into public consciousness. More recently, HBO was yet again responsible for directing everyone’s attention to Jersey’s criminal affiliations. This time it was Nucky Thompson, a politician and organized crime boss in Boardwalk Empire which is set in Atlantic City during the prohibition era. Sure, you’ve become familiar with Tony and Nucky, but there was also an animated TV crime lord that you may not remember. His name was Boss Poso. Chances are, if you never crossed the streams and drank your Ecto Cooler every morning like a good little kid, you probably remember this big fat tub of purple ectoplasm.

Growing up in Jersey, I knew of so many people who were said to be “connected.” I can’t imagine that there’s heavy mob activity in North Dakota or Mississippi, so, living here in the Tri-State Area comes with the added bonus of real life exposure to organized crime. It was even in the shows I watched as a kid.

Like a lot of you I was religious about watching The Real Ghostbusters. It was one of my favorite cartoons growing up. Seeing that my state was mentioned frequently throughout the series always amused me. I saw both Ghostbusters films in the theater when they were originally released and I obviously realized that they were filmed and set in New York City, but as a kid, New York City seemed like a totally different world. As I got a little older, I realized that New York City was right through the tunnel, or what we used to call “the straw.”

My queen Janine Melnitz in Poso’s Clutches – very similar to Leia and Jabba in ROTJ

With our close proximity to Manhattan, it was almost a given for New Jersey to get some air time once in a while. Even with all five boroughs for writers to play around with, they still found reasons to send the Ghostbusters over to Jersey. Not much has changed because the Garden State was still the brunt of jokes back in October of 1989 when the episode of Slimer and The Real Ghostbusters “Partners in Slime” first aired.

In the episode, Poso, a Jabba the Hutt inspired ghost, involved in organized crime, wants to become the godfather of all the ghosts and maintain control over them. He figures that the easiest way to go about this is to take over the Ghostbusters operation. To accomplish this, his minions (who resemble 1930s gangsters) pluck Janine and Louis Tully out of a mall (enjoying our minimally lower sales tax while shopping on Janine’s birthday) by trapping them Tower of Terror style in an elevator. Poso then takes them for ransom and won’t let them go until the Ghostbusters fork over their headquarters and their ‘busting equipment to him.

Shifter points out Ghost Town, NJ but his finger is NOWHERE NEAR NEW JERSEY!

Slimer apprises the guys of the situation. The rest of the episode involves the Ghostbusters orchestrating a pretty elaborate plan to rescue Janine and Louis. The guys release a ghost, Shifter, who used to be Poso’s sidekick. He’s instrumental in their *SPOILER* eventual nabbing of Boss Poso, whose lair is located in Ghost Town, NJ. When hearing the term “Ghost Town,” it might bring to mind a desolate town out west or down south with tumbleweeds rolling across the dirt. Nah, it’s in Jersey and on the Ghostbusters Wiki it’s described as “a run down town in New Jersey.” Gee thanks, not another one! These episodes were only 22 minutes long, so for the sake of time, the Ghostbusters only had to make the trek over the Hudson river to Jersey in a spooky little “ferry” similar to the one Charon paddles around in the original Clash of the Titans.

Four other great things about this episode:

An Undead Hooker
Mood Slime returns!
Cameos by the Stay-Puft Marshmallow Man and Samhain
A Vigo The Carpathian Shout-Out

The fact that The Real Ghostbusters wasn’t just a knockoff of the feature film was an element that didn’t bother me. I remember some friends in school not liking the show just because it “wasn’t like the movie.” I doubt the people responsible for the show back then expected 6 year old kids to have such discerning taste. After a really good run of several seasons, the show morphed into Slimer and The Real Ghostbusters. The plots began to feature more of the exploits of Slimer and Janine Melnitz. Each episode became a slightly more goofy and child friendly in nature. Not necessarily worse than previous seasons, just infusing more Slimer. The ghosts weren’t as nightmare inducing, and the major villains weren’t as formidable. But you already know that. Maybe Boss Poso shouldn’t have been lumped in with the likes of Tony Soprano and Nucky Thompson after all!

*Read about The Real Ghostbusters and The New Jersey Parallelogram and be sure to Take a look at some animation cels from this episode with Shawn from Branded in the ’80s

“Hey Fun-Ghoul, I’m Sexy Armpit!”

Posted on October 1, 2013 by sexyarmpit

In my last post I recapped the NJ KISS Expo, but that wasn’t the extent of our adventure that day, nope, not by a long shot! It was a gorgeous Saturday and there was much more to do. Next on the agenda was a place that falls right in line with the Halloween Countdown!

Not often will one of my posts feature a title inspired by one of Rizzo’s lines in the movie Grease. If there are any Pink Ladies out there, savor it while you can. I’m always a sucker for a cheap double entendre, but I’m also a sucker for a good old fashioned, brilliantly named costume shop, and for 26 years the Fun-Ghoul Costume Shop in Rutherford, NJ has been all that. Checking this place out has been on my agenda for a very long time, but over the weekend we finally took a trip there.

I had no idea what to expect from this place before going in. As I mentioned, I’ve heard of the place, but it wasn’t like anyone ever recommended it to me. I’ve seen ads a long time ago in Weird NJ (at least I think I did!), but other than that I was going in blind. All I knew is that they sell costumes. Judging by my Apple maps, I didn’t even think the place existed anymore since it kept bringing us to the same address in the next town over. For a good 10 minutes I was absolutely convinced that this place had become a chiropractor’s office. The Fun-Ghoul Shop is located at 155 Park Ave in Rutherford, but we kept getting directed to 155 Park Ave in Lyndhurst which is exactly a mile away. It was frustrating, but by the time I became officially fed up, we’d finally found it!

While walking up to storefront, My friend L.C and I agreed that it felt like we might have been headed into the Magic Shop in Pee Wee’s Big Adventure. Upon entering we were greeted by an employee who offered his help if we needed anything. Things weren’t incredibly organized, but the place definitely had personality. I saw a few animated Dracula statues, mannequins, and some random masks and wigs around the store, and it was pretty cool, but I had this feeling that there had to be more. The shop had a healthy stock of costumes, but it wasn’t anywhere near as vast as a Spirit Halloween store. It’s unfortunate, but the Spirit stores are like the Wal-Mart and Targets of costume shops and they don’t give local businesses much of a shot. In Fun-Ghoul’s case, they’ve survived because they diversified and they’re open all year long.

See, it’s not just a costume shop, the Fun-Ghoul footprint spans 3 connecting storefronts on Park Avenue. I knew there was more to this place! The tall gentleman who greeted us began chatting with us about what kind of costumes we were looking for and I explained that for a long time I’ve wanted to stop in to see what their place was all about. Then I asked him what was in the other adjacent shops.

I didn’t think it would be anything too offbeat like a taxidermist or shrunken head supply store, but I admit the possibility of that was there. Once I probed a little bit, the guy told me that he was asked to work the 3 shops all day. I sympathized with him and said “So that means you have to walk back and forth to the stores and lock up after you leave each one?” He verified that was precisely what he had to do. Knowing that info, you’d think I would leave the guy alone and not make him go crazy, but I was so curious to see what was in the other shops. “Can you take us into the other stores?” Yes, I was that annoying guy who’s bothering this dude on a beautiful Saturday.

It was early afternoon and neither the town, nor its stores seemed to have many people around. Fun-Ghoul was empty when we got there, so it gave us ample time to walk around and snap photos, something I may or may not have been allowed to do. Thanks to our Times Scare fiasco, I now have an irrational fear of using a camera. Plus, I didn’t feel as bad basically asking for a store tour.

“Before we ask you to lock up and take us in to the other shop, what do the other stores sell anyway?” He explained to me that they have the costume shop, the costume rental shop, and…a PROP shop. My ears must’ve perked up as if I was a dog because the idea of a prop store piqued my interest.

“Oooh can you take us into the prop store?” I was like a little kid. He locked up and brought us over into the other store. Upon entering I thought to myself “this is exactly what we came for.” Picturing this place in your mind isn’t difficult. Think of your neighbors half finished basement filled to the brim with the most random and elaborate Halloween decorations ever. That is this store, and it was glorious.

The first thing I noticed were the two humongous Oscar statues. Not everything was Halloweeny, but the majority of it was pretty macabre as you can gather from the photos. Everything was for sale. I didn’t ask for pricing on anything because I just unloaded a wad of cash earlier at the KISS Expo and I knew the day wasn’t over. As I stood in awe snapping 650,000 photos, I noticed our store employee was nowhere to be found. Our friend L.C said “Hm, what’s back here?” and I looked toward the back of the shop where I saw an open doorway that let a dim light peek out. L.C started to walk toward it.

Still unaware of where our shop employee vanished to, I cautiously shouted “Is it alright if we go back there?” And I heard him say “Yes, come back here.” It was time for a Shaggy and Scooby-style GULP. His voice sounded like it was coming from the back room which indicated to me that he was just waiting for our curiosity to lead us there.

Fearlessly, I walked toward the doorway. Once inside, it all made sense. I knew a place like this must have had a secret room or something. It was right out of a movie. The room was like a dark ride without the boat ride. It’s like a mini-haunted walk through that must be seen to be believed! I don’t know if I’m just not hanging out with the right circle of friends or what, but I’ve lived in Jersey my whole life and never once heard about this. I guess it’s just something you need to stumble on yourself, but if I hadn’t asked the nice guy at the store if we could check out the other shops, we would’ve left having seen only a costume shop.

I didn’t even ask to go into the costume rental part of their store because I felt I reached the pinnacle of what they had to offer. Besides, there were Smurf heads, Easter Bunny, and Frosty the Snowman heads with their respective full body costumes neatly organized for people to rent. It’s kind of creepy when you walk by the storefront and see the heads staring back at you through the window. Totally different experience when someone is wearing one and taking pictures with children.

I didn’t make a purchase at Fun-Ghoul, but it was well worth the confusion of getting there. If I ever need a sarcophagus or a squishy, life-size alien body for a staged autopsy, I know where to go. More stores need employees that lure you into secret rooms that spontaneously transform into haunted attractions after switching on a black light.

The Fun-Ghoul Costume Co.
155 Park Avenue
Rutherford, NJ 07070

NJ KISS Expo 2013 Recap

Posted on October 1, 2013 by sexyarmpit

This weekend was packed with stuff that I want to tell you about. The first of these adventures was the New Jersey KISS Expo at the NJ Convention & Expo Center in Edison, NJ.

Oh, you know there’s an old adage that my great great great Aunt Florence used to say and that was “If you’ve been to one KISS convention, you’ve been to them all.” That might be true, but after going to a shit ton of them in my life, I can’t say there’s ever a moment when I’m at one that I’m ever NOT amused every second. Of course, if you’re not down with KISS, which many people aren’t, then you might not enjoy one of these, but there’s also a chance that if you aren’t a fan, you might be leaving as a newly inducted member of the KISS Army. That’s usually what happens.

KISS cons and expos have a way of seducing non-fans. An outsider might see the mystique and aura that surrounds the band, especially if they know nothing about them. That’s the best part of KISS. Walking around the expo center in Edison on Saturday, was no different than the other KISS expos I’ve been to, but it’s just a good time and a chance to not only buy KISS stuff, but also mingle with fellow KISS Army members. It was a total geek-out for us.

One time a friend once asked me, “What do you do at a KISS convention?” I always thought that was a silly question, but it really isn’t because not everyone knows what KISS is all about. For many fans, including myself, it’s about the music foremost, but there’s a large part of it that’s about collecting cool KISS crap. So yeah, buy some KISS stuff, look at some KISS stuff, listen to a KISS tribute band, can you see the underlying theme here?

Sometimes though, it’s almost like you MUST buy something just to justify why you go to KISS cons. My only minor complaint about the NJ KISS expo is that attendees pay anywhere from $10-$20 dollars admission, but the show is relatively small. There are 2 large dealer rooms and that’s about it. Unless you purchase a ticket to a V.I.P signing, such as Tommy Thayer (or last year was Peter Criss I believe) that’s the extent of the show. I was hoping this year would be bigger, but it was pretty much the same as previous years. Also featured was KISSNation, a KISS Tribute band, but next year they need to get the larger space in the building and make the event a bigger deal. They can open up their dealer rooms to not only KISS dealers, but also toy and pop culture dealers as well.

You want me to stop with all the jibber jabber and cut to the point where I tell you what I bought? Actually, I will do that because if I don’t, I’ll literally continue writing about KISS until 6 a.m tomorrow morning. Luckily, for brevity’s sake, I only picked up 2 things. Well, it was ALMOST four.

The only reason why I decided against the above pictured jacket was because it probably wouldn’t have fit me. Otherwise, why wouldn’t I want a ridiculously colorful KISS jacket that looked like it was made out of a kid’s plastic kite from Toys R Us in 1991? I still have my KISS rain slicker made out of a yellow Slip ‘n Slide material from ’86 that I never wear. In retrospect, cooler heads prevailed here, and by cooler I mean I wasn’t swayed by my emotions. A cooler head would obviously be wearing this insane KISS jacket while writing this.

That jacket would really go well with a silver $20 dollar FUCK ring. Just to explain that one…it’s a Twent-ttty-doll-har ringgg that has the word F-U-C-K on it. Who would ever need a wedding band or an engagement ring when you can have a FUCK ring?

For realz though, my first real acquisition was a KISS poster. the poster was affectionately labeled “Pink Creatures Poster.” I would’ve bought it on best name principle alone. KISS fans know what this means, even the casual ones. It’s a whimsical title, but it’s not a secret code, it’s just stating that the background is pink and the album it was made in promotion of was Creatures of the Night, and poster means it’s a big ass photograph printed on a quite large piece of paper. Keep in mind that this is a 30 year old poster, not one you could find all over Spencer’s in the mall in 1999. The poster features the late Eric Carr, my favorite drummer, and it caught my eye because its pink background stood out. I admit that was part of why I bought it. It’s always cool to see KISS in front of a background that’s not black or gray. KISS did pose for a lot pictures in front of brightly colored canvases in the late ’70s as well as through the ’80s, and this was one of the cooler ones.

Let me make it abundantly clear that I DO NOT need any more posters. I own so many damn posters that I could probably wallpaper the entire interior of the New Jersey Expo Center. At this point, I have two framed posters waiting patiently to be put up on my wall and this new one’s probably waited 30 some odd years to get put up and now it won’t see the light of day until, I don’t know, 2023? Sorry pink creatures poster 🙁 you’ll always be posted right here on my blog.

Next up was an old metal magazine. Typically I wouldn’t buy just a random old rock or metal magazine, but I found the cover to be pretty funny and appropriate. As if you hadn’t noticed, my favorite rock band of all time is KISS while Miss Sexy Armpit’s favorite “rock” band is Bon Jovi. I loved Bon Jovi in the ’80s and even in the ’90s, but basically all of their modern stuff has been totally weak. They lose even more points for alienating Richie Sambora and then firing him! If you know Richie, he’s a genuinely kickass guy and deserves much better treatment than that. So screw you Jon Bon Jovi!

KISS vs Bon Jovi? NO F*CKING CONTEST. Just blast a few of the hardest KISS tracks like “Parasite,” “Deuce,” “War Machine,” “I Stole Your Love,” and “Unholy” and you’ll know in a second who’s the better band. Even performing their weakest tracks in a concert 600 miles away from New Jersey, KISS would still blow Bon Jovi into the Atlantic Ocean. I’m pretty sure this was one of the easiest ways to sell a magazine in January of 1988. Motley Crue vs. Skid Row! ROUND 2 – FIGHT!

The Ghastly Side of Boardwalk Empire: A Gallery

Posted on September 8, 2013 by sexyarmpit

Tonight is the Season 4 premiere of HBO’s incredible series Boardwalk Empire. Set in Atlantic City during the prohibition period, the superbly acted show brings you into the life of politician/gangster Nucky Thompson (Steve Buscemi). Often, his world isn’t as glamorous as you might think.

Such as with most of the shows on HBO, many beautiful women have starred in Boardwalk Empire such as Gretchen Mol, Aleksa Palladino, Kelly Mcdonald, and Heather Lind. The beauty ends there because most of the time, the show isn’t pretty. Brutal killing is common practice, so if you are faint-of-heart, you’ll be looking away often. Richard Harrow’s mangled face might also prove to be unsettling for you as well.

Events that take place in Boardwalk Empire can be considered shocking and gruesome so let’s take a look at the dark side of the show. I’ve scoured the Internet to bring you an array of ghastly, grotesque and downright creepy interpretations of some characters featured in Boardwalk Empire.

I own this piece – couldn’t resist getting it a while back:

via artist Steve Rolston on Deviant Art

I never knew it existed but it’s f*cking awesome: Pearl Cosplay! via RedChurippu on Deviant Art

This Richard Harrow mask has made the rounds all over the Internet thanks to one of my favorite artists Jon Defreest via the original Vulture link

Richard Harrow Fan Art via NastyNoser on Deviant Art

Phantom of the Boardwalk via Jhanquaza on Deviant Art

Ventriloquist dummies are almost ALWAYS creepy so here is Nelson Van Alden (a.k.a ZOD) as a ventriloquist dummy via artist Micro on Society 6

Thanks for checking out this post. Pay a visit to all the amazing artists featured here. I leave you with Van Alden’s eye bugging out. Your welcome.

http://www.hbo.com/boardwalk-empire/index.html

Mural Memories and Macabre Scenes in Middlesex NJ

Posted on September 7, 2013 by sexyarmpit

The store window of Ghouls Gags & Gifts, a Halloween costume shop, features masks of Jason, Vader, and Chewbacca in the window along with rental costumes of Dracula and Wonder Woman. A Thriller zombie dance is happening in the street while the Bride of Frankenstein looks like she’s heading into the store do some damage on her credit card.

The artist drew a happy fanboy from NJ reading Weird NJ and wore a Mezco Toys t-shirt

I’ve always been a big fan of hand painted wall murals. My Aunt and Uncle had several done in their house before I was born and they are still there ’til this day. I admire the shit out of them every time I visit. There’s something about artists applying their work directly to a wall of a place you live in everyday that evokes such a one of kind feeling in me. To a lesser degree it’s like a tattoo. This all depends on how good the artist is of course. My sister drew on her walls when she was a kid, and that’s certainly not the type of wall artwork that I had in mind. Her sloppy scrawling of “I love Jordan Knight” although memorable, is nothing compared to the interior wall art we’ll look at in this post. I appreciate wall murals most when the subject matter reflects the inhabitants’ vibe and personalities, such as at Ferraro’s Pizzeria and Pub in Middlesex, NJ.

I love how the trees seem like they are growing out of the mural and
the canopy fits right over the view of the inside of the cafe

Depending on the nature of the mural I tend to appreciate the kitsch factor. When there’s a lot of details to investigate I’ll wind up mesmerized. As I mentioned, the murals my Aunt and Uncle have in their place include a ’50s diner scene as well as a scene of the New York City skyline viewed from within Central Park. I have vivid memories of studying these as a kid. They seemed so grand and enormous in scale to me when I was young. In comparison to having Samantha Fox and LJN WWF action figure posters plastered all over my walls, a mural was serious business. A mural is actual art. It’s not a framed replica of art or a vintage movie poster. It’s much more permanent. If you get bored with a poster in a frame you can just remove it and slip another one in. This was the real deal – directly on the wall.

Elvira, Vampira, or non-descript Goth woman? Up to your imagination.

When I went with Miss Sexy Armpit to Ferraro’s for a birthday party for a dear friend a couple of years back, I wound up frozen in amazement once inside the party room. My eyes squinted while my head scanned the walls slowly back and forth to make sure I wasn’t seeing things. Sure enough, there were these cool murals all over the walls. It not only gave the space a cozy atmosphere, but it was also kitschy without being tacky if that makes any sense. If the walls were all just one bland color, such as beige, the atmosphere would’ve been excruciatingly dull. These murals made being in the space feel like it was another dimension set apart from the rest of the restaurant. It’s not often a restaurant has such a conversation piece like this that distinguishes it from other places in the local area.

Girls Gone Wild Mardi Gras Edition Starring Slave Leia and Jabba The Hutt

The element of surprise also played a factor in my admiration for these murals. I can’t say I expected to see any of “my friends” on the walls of what I thought was a run of the mill Italian place. By friends I mean Elvira and Slave Leia. The murals were like an explosion of pop culture characters along with an infusion of local flavor. The murals feel like they come alive in certain aspects. I’ve held onto the pictures I took that night and have been meaning to post them during the last two Halloween Countdowns, but I kept forgetting that I had them. I hope you enjoy perusing them as much as I did. Check out the place if you’re in the area. The food is really good and they have some excellent liquid concoctions at the bar.

This isn’t so much scary as it is a bit perverse. You can’t see it, but the person opening the

towel is actually a dude. Just kidding. And the guy with the mirror/ping pong paddle has NO EYES! That part is true. That must have some deeper meaning.

Ferraro’s Pizzeria and Pub
275 Lincoln Blvd
Middlesex, NJ 08846