After Stewart cut his own rebuttal, Rollins ambushed him on one of his recent shows by making it seem like he was beamed in via satellite when he was actually right there in the studio. WWE has now confirmed that Stewart will appear on Raw tonight, live from The Prudential Center in Newark to possibly confront Rollins. Will they settle their gripe at WrestleMania? Doubtful that Stewart would actually take a bump, so it’s likely he will be in the corner of Rollins’ opponent at WrestleMania. Right now, it looks like Rollins will be facing “The Viper” Randy Orton.
NJ T-Shirt Tuesday 113: RAW IS JERSEY!
Even if you’re not a wrestling fan, you might have heard about the WWE Network. It’s like Netflix for the WWE. After spending over a week with it, I can honestly say it’s one of the most awesome things ever. At the risk of sounding like a commercial, for only $9.99 a month, you get the option of watching any WWE, ECW, and WCW pay-per-view ever (including the latest monthly events) along with a ton of other programming. I’ve been glued to it every single day since it premiered on 2/24. This brings me to the t-shirt of the day which is perfect for fans of New Jersey and WWE.
If you are indeed a WWE fan, it’s a pretty damn cool time to be one. Monday nights have been pretty interesting as the company is building up for their biggest event of the year: Wrestlemania 30! Get ready to feel old: Monday Night Raw, the WWE’s live 3-hour show, has been airing for over 20 years (even more sick: I’ve been watching WWF/E for over 30 years!) You could imagine that being able to sit around and relive all these great memories has been quite amazing. The only thing better would be sitting around in an appropriate t-shirt.
Wrestling t-shirt gurus Barber Shop Window offer all kinds of funny and ironic wrestling tees that depict wrestlers and slogans spanning from the present to as far back as you can remember. It’s hard to log on to their site and not want to buy at least 5 or 6 shirts in one shot, but who has that kind of money besides The Million Dollar Man? I can help you make a decision though. If you look forward to watching live wrestling on Monday Nights, and you have pride in your state, go with their “Your State is RAW!” series of tees.
This t-shirt series will bring you back to wrestling’s territory days because they feature the shape of your state in the style of the WWE logo! Pictured above is the New Jersey version (obviously) and it will make you chant and scream in the loudest possible register, just like the fans at the Izod Center did the night after Wrestlemania 29!
These tees may soon become nostalgic in their own right. The front of the shirts use the same WWE “scratch logo” design which seems like it’s slowly being phased out in favor of the newer and much more sleek WWE logo that premiered with the Network. Don’t let that stop you from representing your pride in the business and your state at the same time.
Brock Lesnar Inhales $500 Dollars Worth of Food at Montclair NJ Restaurant
I hate reading TMZ and all the tabloid/gossip sites, but this relates to 2 of my favorite things – New Jersey and Pro-Wrestling!
Brock Lesnar, the monstrous pro-wrestler turned UFC fighter turned pro-wrestler, was just a little bit hungry after Monday Night Raw this week. After tossing CM Punk around the ring area to kickoff a feud between them leading to Summerslam, Brock took his wife, former WWE Diva Sable, to Fresco, an Italian restaurant in Montclair, NJ. The gigantic feast he partook in cost him over $500 dollars, and he supposedly shared only two items with his wife. Below you can read what he ordered.
- Ahi tuna with asparagus (shared)
- Margherita pizza (shared)
- Chicken Parm.with triple-extra chicken
- Full bowl of parpadelle bolognese
- Slice of cheesecake for himself
Back From Hiatus!
A few other major events have been going on in personal life as well. Two of my close friends are getting married within the same week this month and I’m in both wedding parties. One of the guys is Mike @idiotatplay who co-stars in The Sexy Armpit show on our YouTube channel. Mind you, getting all dressed up is not something that I truly enjoy, but for these guys I don’t mind at all, and Mike’s letting us wear Chuck Taylor’s with the tuxedo’s, so it’s all good!
WWE RAW World Tour Comes to Wildwood Tomorrow!
CM Punk’s Soul Bounces As He Ascends To Stardom
It’s amazing what a little bit of creativity and simplicity can do for the wrestling business. For the past couple of weeks CM Punk has lit up the pro wrestling world with his controversial segments on RAW. They are only controversial because he’s pointing out flaws of the state of the WWE when no one else had the balls to. Last night he walked out of WWE’s Money In The Bank Pay Per View in Chicago as the new WWE Champion on his supposed last day with the company, which is a no-no in traditional pro wrestling etiquette.
CM Punk has finally established himself as one of the biggest names in WWE history thanks to his mic work, and ring ability, but it was his overall frustration with the WWE that has already ascended him to legend status. However straight edge Punk fits into the future storyline, if the WWE screws it up, then that will deflate the gigantic fiery ball of heat Punk built for himself. In the past several years I’ve lost so much faith in the writing and creative teams in WWE that I have very little left, so I’m hoping they prove me wrong. They have put on excellent shows these last few weeks so I hope the momentum continues.
Chicago may be CM Punk’s hometown, but one of his favorite bands is from New Brunswick, New Jersey. Icons of the New Jersey punk scene, The Bouncing Souls have been together since 1987. CM Punk has made it known that he’s a huge fan, via his Twitter account, and going so far as to tattoo one of their logos on him. Punk has even used 2 Bouncing Souls tracks as his entrance themes “Night Train” and “Ole!”
Classic WWF/WWE Event Cards From New Jersey #7
these up so feel free to print your own if you’re going to the show!
This WWE event card can’t possibly be considered classic. So, before you go running your mouth, keep in mind that not only did I create this event card myself in Photoshop, but the event hasn’t even happened yet! You’ll notice the event card lists the matches that will be taking place at Saturday’s WWE show at Izod Center in East Rutherford, NJ. I’m bringing my nephew to his first WWE event so I’m hoping it’s a good one, although I have my doubts. My main objective with making my own WWE event card for this show is to highlight an aspect of WWE that I absolutely abhor.
What makes you want to see a movie? Most times it’s a simple preview trailer that you see before another movie or on TV while other times you may have just heard good things about a film from a friend. Either way, a professional wrestling event is fairly similar to a movie in that way. No matter how much the WWE tries to distance itself from the word “wrestling,” that’s what it is and that’s what it always will be. If there ever comes a day when WWE Superstars actually cease wrestling in a ring, then it will simply become a TV show. But even the best TV shows air previews of their new fall season, their next episode, their season finale, etc. How else will viewers decide if they want to watch? How else will they even know about a new show or an upcoming movie?
Somewhere in the late ’90s, WWE stopped airing their Pay Per View promos that informed the audience all about what matches they would see at the next event. For instance, The Wrestlemania Report, was merely a few minutes and was hosted by Gene Okerlund, Sean Mooney, or Todd Pettengill…take your pick! The reports were fun, well produced, and always geared me up for the next big event. Seeing the card of matches being reported in a serious newsworthy way added significance to the matches. Occasionally just the sheer amount of matches would get me excited.
The modern day WWE could use help in selling their Pay Per Views, so bringing back a report like this would help. I want to know who’s going to be wrestling, why they are wrestling, what belt is on the line, what stipulations are in the match, and drop some history on us about previous bouts involving these competitors. This isn’t rocket science, this is the lowest common denominator! Why do you think people actually read Amazon reviews? Because they are trying to decide whether to buy a product. Why should I buy the WWE’s next piece of shit Pay Per View?
Capitol Punishment is the next WWE event and it happens live this Sunday. Unfortunately, I can only tell you 2 or 3 of the matches. Why is that? Mostly because WWE consistently fails to promote the matches at the next event unless it’s a week before the event, and they’re also miserable at making me care about any of the feuds going on at any time. This time around all we got was an abysmal, choppy, and lame attempt at humor where WWE Superstars were cut into press conference footage with Barack Obama. It told us nothing about the event AT ALL! Until the 2000’s, I was known to get really excited about the upcoming Pay Per Views because the matches were usually must see and WWE touted them as such every chance they had. Even the under cards added value to the events. Nowadays, I turn on Raw without knowing any matches, and it seems like they come up with them as the night goes along. They sure as hell don’t bother telling us what matches are going to happen next week on Raw, that would be too much to ask. Usually they don’t even know themselves.
We WWE fans continue to watch even though we have no idea what’s in store for us. Unless you’re a 6 year old kid like my nephew, you’re probably going to walk away underwhelmed. I suppose they don’t want to back themselves into a corner. I still think that a simple Wrestlemania Report would work better than telling every commentator to say “It’s going to be the GREATEST Wrestlemania in HISTORY,” because they say that every year, they just don’t tell us why it’s going to be.
Mourning The Macho Man Randy Savage: My Macho Memories
Sexy Armpit & Miss Sexy Armpit (top) Macho Man (bottom) |
I’M IN MACHO MISERY RIGHT NOW. The news of the passing of Macho Man Randy Savage has wrestling fans and the entire world buzzing right now. Savage was not only an icon of sports entertainment but a fixture in popular culture for many years. Describing Savage as a hero of mine is an understatement. I’m sure there will be an outpouring of tweets, blog posts, and YouTube tributes, and rightfully so, but this post will serve as a collection of my own Macho Memories.
Many of my Macho Man memories involve Miss Elizabeth. She was such a huge part of his mystique after he hired her as his manager. It was a controversial move to hire a sexy female valet who many thought had no mastery of the wrestling business. As we all know, they were a match made in heaven and hopefully they’ve met up so Savage could hoist her up on his shoulders once again for old time sake.
I had been into wrestling for about 2 years at that point. During that period in the WWF I remember everyone buzzing about Macho Man and Elizabeth. They were a hot topic and the couple grabbed the attention of everyone, not only wrestling fans. When the Miss Elizabeth LJN action figure first came out I remember wanting it so bad. I waited and waited and finally I got a special opportunity from my parents on Christmas Eve that year. They let my sister and I open each others gifts. After ripping open the paper I was so excited to see that my sister got me the Miss Elizabeth figure! Now Macho Man would walk the aisle with some arm candy.
Some people look back fondly on the greatest moments of their life. Some cite winning a high school football championship, getting married, or winning a huge sum in the lottery as random memorable life moments. Believe it or not, some of the greatest moments of my life involve WWF and Macho Man Randy Savage. His heel win to become I-C Champ, Savages feud with George the Animal Steele who was in love with Elizabeth, Savage vs. Steamboat at Wrestlemania 3, all the events that lead to the formation of The Mega Powers, The Wrestlemania 4 tournament which concluded with Savage winning his first WWF World Championship and sharing the greatest moment of all time in the WWF with Miss Elizabeth and The Hulkster in Atlantic City NJ. Then the Mega Powers exploded in the same venue at the next Wrestlemania. Years later he was in memorable feuds with Jake The Snake and Undertaker, Flair, and Ultimate Warrior.
Life was so simple back then. Who cares if I sound old! On sunny and hot summer days I would walk down the local Rite Aid or ask my Dad to bring me to Quick Check and scan the magazine racks for the official WWF Magazine. A couple in particular made me literally explode with excitement. My sister dropped by while I was at a neighbors house to bring me the July 1988 issue with Savage on the cover. I nearly went into convulsions. I don’t think kids get this excited anymore over a magazine, but it made my month back then. I’d worship the pages and read the same articles over and over. It sounds incredible, but I can remember the exact moment I got most of them. I still have those magazines too.
Growing up, my best friend Frank and I were immensely influenced by Macho Man. It was easy for two best friends to call themselves The Mega Powers, but it was another to start filming themselves wrestle at a time when taping yourself wrestling wasn’t en vogue at all. At least in my neck of New Jersey, taping backyard wrestling matches wasn’t something that people we knew ever did. Leave it to us to spend our Friday and Saturday nights recording promos and matches while our friends went and “socialized” with each other. In our first match ever, we chose to explode the Mega Powers yet again just for the hell of it.
I know a lot of people claim that their parents are the greatest, but My Dad is seriously in the Dad Hall of Fame. He’s always been a fan of WWF right along with me. The fact that he interacted in my little obsession with me meant more than anyone could ever imagine. Through the big wrestling boom in the ’80s and then through the times when WWF fans got made fun of for still liking it well after it’s popularity surge was over – it was so cool to be able to share those moments with him. Of course he used to watch Saturday Night’s Main Event with me and bring me upstairs after I fell asleep on the couch, but there was one time in particular years later that will always stick out in my mind.
After Monday Night Raw premiered in 1993 I made it a big TV event. It was the highlight of my week. I set up my TV chair and grabbed my drink and snacks. Occasionally my Dad would watch with me, but other times if he was busy he would tell me to let him know if something good happens and he’ll come watch. That’s the kind of thing that meant a lot to me. I didn’t toss the baseball around much, I didn’t have much interest in sports or fixing cars, my world was all about WWF. He was a big fan of Macho Man and Razor Ramon at that time.
In 1994, prior to Wrestlemania 10, Randy Savage and Crush began a feud that was pretty hardcore in WWF at that time. My father and I were shocked as we witnessed Crush turn on Savage. Crush pressed Savage up over his head and dropped him onto the steel barricade, lacerating his tongue. We were both in awe of how this played out in a very realistic way. Since that was just before the computer era really took off, there were no spoilers or dirt sheets to ruin the storylines, so it was a vivid and surprising night on Raw. The feud culminated at Wrestlemania 10 in a falls count anywhere match, just over the river at Madison Square Garden in NYC. It was Savage’s last appearance at a Wrestlemania.
In recent times, Savage has kept a low profile but I’ve kept his spirit alive as much as I could. I’ve dressed up as Macho Man twice in the last couple of years. The first time was for a Halloween Costume Party at Asbury Lanes and my girlfriend dressed up as Miss Elizabeth. You can read more about that in this post. The next time I went with the classic lavender Macho Man T-Shirt and matching bandanna for my friend Jane’s surprise ’80s style birthday party. Each time it was a big hit and everyone was complimenting me on how good I pulled off the look. I even won runner up in the costume contest at Asbury Lanes.
I will miss you so much Macho Man, you were larger than life to me and no one will ever come close to having your unique blend of electric charisma and ring skills of a king. I hope the Fink announced you into heaven with Pomp and Circumstance echoing throughout the universe. “We’re gonna climb that mountain together and we are together forever Oooooh Yeah!” Elizabeth…DOWN THAT AISLE!
Can MacGruber Save WWE Raw at The Meadowlands from SUCKING?
New Jersey’s Great Pop Culture Moments Vol. 28: Dennis Miller on WWE Raw
WWE Monday Night Raw has taken a nose dive ever since they started with this special guest host garbage. Grabbing low tier celebs in attempts to surge ratings is a piss poor stunt. Whatever happened to improving storylines, actually training talent instead of just throwing them on TV, and instead of bragging about being the “longest running weekly episodic television show in history,” a factoid they announce ad nauseum, why not prove it on the show? Monday Night Raw used to have literally epic stuff happening. When WWF was ailing in the mid ’90s, before Stone Cold and The Rock brought a big boom back to the wrestling biz, WWF Monday Night Raw was revolutionary wrestling programming. The last few years Raw has plummeted and last Monday’s episode did not help to raise the bar.
You too can be guest host of Monday Night Raw, but only if you have something to promote. Dennis Miller was promoting USA Cares, the non profit group that provides financial assistance to military families, which he’s the spokesperson for. From a programming standpoint, there was no better time to feature Miller on the show since WWE’s Tribute to the Troops airs this week. Also, many viewers watching may be more apt to donate money during the holidays. While I’m on the subject of things unrelated to wrestling, Dennis Miller’s weak shtick was chock full of random, forced pop references. Name dropping Amy Winehouse, Courtney Love, and MTV’s Jersey Shore all in the same joke was kind of a stretch. Half of the fans in the arena in Corpus Christi, Texas that night weren’t even alive when Hole was popular. Now Jersey Shore on the other hand really grabs people.
Miller also made another reference to New Jersey as he sent a dig to Mr. McMahon. Miller said “Vince will be at The Chuckle House this Friday, Route 67 in Paramus New Jersey.” The best thing about New Jersey is that no matter whether it’s Saturday Night Live or WWE Raw, New Jersey almost always provides a winning punchline. I don’t care if we are the brunt of all the jokes because it provides me with more fodder.
If you Google “The Chuckle House Paramus New Jersey,” you won’t find any info on a comedy club in New Jersey. As much the NJ connoisseur that I am, I could not find any info on The Chuckle House. This may have been a comedy club back in the day, or it still operates with absolutely no web presence whatsoever, which is unheard of. Of course, there’s the other possibility that Miller just made this joint up out of thin air. Although, in case you were wondering, Route 67 is a real road in NJ.
Instead of being relevant to the wrestling industry, the guest hosts have been B-list celebs and people who aren’t even connected with the Raw audience. Wouldn’t logic dictate that they should feature WWE HOF wrestlers, managers, valets, and former commentators as guest hosts? I can understand if a celebrity plays into a storyline, but asking a guest host to be on the show just for the hell of it or to get onto more headlines on the Internet is a good ploy, but really f-cking stupid. Since Miller has veered toward politics rather than making people laugh, he seems like an odd choice for guest host. I’m happy they teased the upcoming appearance of Bret “The Hitman” Hart hosting Raw since he’s an icon in the business. That leaves me with only one question: Where the f-ck is Craig DeGeorge?!?!?! Now he’s my choice for guest host!