Katrina Bowden is August’s Garden State Playmate!

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We don’t look at the gross side of things here at The Sexy Armpit nearly enough. That’s why I wanted to change it up a bit for this month’s Garden State Playmate. Wealthy/snobby town Wyckoff, NJ not only spawned the Jonas Brothers, but also actress Katrina Bowden. She may have been voted Esquire Magazine’s 2011’s sexiest woman alive, but is she really? Before we go ahead and crown her Garden State Playmate take a look at the picture below, does she look sexy there? Haha, well that’s just from a movie where she projectile vomits (sexy!) in 3-D, Piranha 3DD, which was completely ridiculous…ridiculously awesome that is. It’s got David Hasselhoff and David Koechner (you know him as Champ Kind from Anchorman), and piranhas escaping from Katrina Bowden’s crotch. So maybe it’s the ambitious roles that Bowden chooses that makes her sexy, or is it the fact that she’s a spoiled Jersey girl with a snotty attitude? Does she make you want to puke or feel kinda funny? You tell us!

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Bowden looks like a cross between the girl next door and an emaciated blonde model type. Eat some White Castles will ya? She’s got the lock on roles that require her to be as dumb as a rock like her character Cerie on 30 Rock in which she accentuates her great comedic timing, among other things. Recently, she’s starred in the latest installment of the American Pie franchise, American Reunion and the TV series New Girl. Out of all her roles I recommend checking her out as Allison in 2010’s Tucker and Dale vs. Evil a kickass horror/comedy, which, aside from 30 Rock, is her best work thus far. Don’t get your hopes up fellas, she’s engaged to NJ musician Ben Jorgensen of the band Armor for Sleep.

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Katrina Bowden Cameltoe from Piranha 3DD…just sayin’

[youtube http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Uq8WVBc3ac8?rel=0]

Jane Krakowski is March’s Garden State Playmate

New Jersey,30 Rock

In my world, before her success as Jenna Maroney on 30 Rock, Jane Krakowski’s most notable role was in National Lampoon’s Vacation. The amount of times myself or someone I was speaking to has quoted Cousin Vicki’s notorious line has reached infinity by now. Say it with me:

COUSIN VICKI: “I’m going steady…and I french kiss…”
AUDREY: “So, everybody does that…”
COUSIN VICKI: “Yeah, but daddy says I’m the best at it…”

Match that little sliver of dialogue with Jane Krakowski’s superb white trash delivery and it solidified her as one of the most talented comedic actresses. Sure, her list of films since Vacation in 1983 has not been spectacular, but she has done steady work, especially in television. Her roles in shows like Ally McBeal and 30 Rock have gained her Golden Globes, SAG awards, and Primetime Emmys.

New Jersey,30 Rock

Presently, Krakowski’s star status is credible and has made mostly everyone forget about how she had to play Betty O’Shale in the prequel, The Flintstones in Viva Rock Vegas. And, if you are a horror buff like me, IMDB lets us in on the tidbit that Krakowski was originally cast in the original Sleepaway Camp as Judy, but dropped out because she felt her death scene was too violent. I don’t think that role would have swayed the direction of her career either way, but if she had been offered the role of Angela, now that decision would have made an impact. Some of Krakowski’s other film roles include Fatal Attraction, Go, Ice Age, Surf’s Up, The Rocker, and Cirque Du Freak: The Vampire’s Assistant.

In addition to her TV and film credits, Krakowski is a singer and has appeared in several Broadway productions such as Grand Hotel, Once Upon a Mattress, and won a Tony Award for her performance in Nine. She also appeared in the 2005 version of Guys and Dolls in London starring Ewan McGregor.

New Jersey,30 Rock

The Parsippany, New Jersey born actress receives extra points for starring in A Muppets Christmas: Letters to Santa, which is one of the better Muppets TV movies, as well as an episode of…The Young Indiana Jones Chronicles!

New Jersey’s Great Pop Culture Moments Vol.12: The Karate Kid is “Goin’ Back to Jersey…to Jersey”

In 1989, The Karate Kid starred in his own short lived animated series. In the 2nd episode, Homecoming, Danielson heads back to his home state of New Jersey to search for a mystical shrine. Sadly, there’s no sign of Johnny Lawrence aka the legendary William Zabka. Although all isn’t lost, since much of the episode’s action takes place at an amusement park. As far as I know there are no amusement parks in Newark, so who knows? Maybe they were at Six Flags Great Adventure?

It was announced last week that a new Karate Kid film may go into production starring Will Smith’s son Jaden.

Finding this video on Hulu was a big score. If you haven’t visited Hulu then get on it! I signed up when it was in beta and it was well worth it. Hulu is my first stop for SNL sketches, full length movies, and TV episodes. It gets me caught up on shows and some ’80s classics during my lunch hour at work.

http://www.hulu.com/embed/MI-D0wH3ZP6DF-_H7YrcGQ

Plans for ’07

I don’t really have any mind blowing plans for ‘07. I’m not gonna be like all the trendy people and say “world domination” is on my list of things to do. I never aim that high.

I thought about writing some really off the wall stuff describing my plans for ’07 but in all honesty I never think of a new year as any different than a few days from now. Let’s be honest how much do things really change? We get older, more cranky. I’m pretty sure I’m gonna keep doing the same things I’ve been doing.

New Jersey will still be known as a shithole. I bet I’ll still watch lame Nicole Eggert movies, usually starring Corey Haim as well. Most likely Gwen Stefani will still be on my iPod. I’ll still be reading comics, eating eggplant parm., and being claustrophobic. WWE, 30 Rock, and Heroes will still be on the top of my list of shows to watch. The wait time for the next Batman movie will dwindle down to 1 year. As you can see, things won’t drastically change. I do wish for MTV to become as cool as they were when I was a kid, minus the reality crap.

Other than the previously stated items, I’ve been having quite a hard time pronouncing the word “brewery.” I don’t know that I have much of a necessity to say “brewery” all that often but I’ll need to get better at saying it anyway.

There’s also no doubt that I’ll keep berating all of you with my blog because I have such a good time doing it. Even if the new year doesn’t bring much change I’m still looking forward it. Happy New Year everyone!