Lock Up Your Daughters, Fairfield Is Here!

[youtube http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BL5J91OkZWU?rel=0]
When a band’s lead singer looks like Zac Efron with more testosterone, it’s only a matter of time before your daughter and/or wife falls in love them. And while having a lead singer who looks like an alum from High School Musical isn’t necessarily the key to success in the music world, not looking like McLovin does help enormously. Last weekend at The Starland Ballroom in Sayreville, NJ, The Sexy Armpit checked out Jersey Shows Battle of the Bands finals. I made it there just in time to catch Jersey pop-rockers Fairfield take the stage.

[youtube http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f2Z2ZngYCxM?rel=0]
The band started out with a short cover of “Lose Yourself,” which was cool even though I’m not an Eminem fan. After introducing themselves, Fairfield launched into a fun, fast paced set of tunes, some of which sound like they are step away from being heard on a preview for the next tween blockbuster or an MTV show. Singer Anthony Tortorello’s undeniable charisma on stage made it seem like he’s been wooing audiences his entire life. It was as if we were in a video game and little red 8-bit hearts of all the girls in the crowd simultaneously floated out of their chests and over to Anthony. For an up and coming band, a solid lead singer is only half the battle. Without the band backing him up, Anthony would need to incorporate some magic tricks or some really lewd jokes into the set.

Fairfield isn’t just about their frontman. This new alternative pop rock band comprises a bunch of best friends who hail from central New Jersey. On their Myspace page they cite Armor For Sleep, Taking Back Sunday, Cartel, and Paramore as their influences. On guitar there’s Francisco Ortiz Gomez and Kyle Gordon, Kevin Yanes on Bass, and Mickey Ladines on drums. I had the chance to meet Kevin and Francisco after the show and they were equally as enthusiastic to meet The Sexy Armpit. Their EP is available at their merch table after the show. Until then you can listen to their tunes at Myspace or LIKE them on Facebook!

The Sexy Armpit’s Top 10 Bands of 2010

One of The Sexy Armpit’s favorite things to do is to check out local bands since they are usually more interesting and put on a better show than the majority of bands who just sit on their mounds and mounds of cash and feel like they can go out and play the same show and same setlist that they’ve been doing for 10 years. People pay for tickets to concerts so they deserve a KICK-ASS show in return. The following bands were chosen by The Sexy Armpit under 2 conditions: 1) they hail from NJ or NY 2) their music is not boring 3) the band puts on an awesome show. This begins our annual NYE countdown of The Sexy Armpit’s Top 10 Bands of the Year!


10. Rapid Fire – F*cking METAL. That is all. They will permanently freeze your fingers into devil horns. Now for the kicker – these dudes are in high school. I was still playing with action figures in high school.

9. The Sexy Heroes – A fun pop-punk type band out of Saddle River, NJ who wears neon firefighter pants at all of their energetic shows. Almost a shoe-in to be the next band that you’re teen daughter will be obsessed with.

8. Natasha Komis – My iPod is chock full of chick rock and Natasha Komis is a nice addition to the playlist. This young Jersey girl has left her appearance on Paris Hilton’s My New BFF behind and is rocking like Joan Jett for the 2k generation. You can get her stuff on iTunes.

7.  The Deafening – Raw hard rock out of New York City. Lead singer Coco Caine’s vocal range soars into the stratosphere while the band gives you a bad case of rock neck. Also on iTunes.

6. The Fletchers – Infectious indie rock out of Highland Park, NJ. Read our review HERE.

5. Those Mockingbirds – I saw them open for the now defunct God Loves a Challenge at Maxwell’s in Hoboken. I picked up their CD after the show and dug it. I see them gaining national attention in the future. This year, make sure you check out one of their lively shows around NJ and PA.

4. Lipstick and Cigarettes – Still considered new on the scene, L and C sounds like they’ve been around for a while…ohhh, say since 1983? This NJ rock band combines modern elements of bands like The Killers, with the classic new wave sounds of The Cars. After my first L and C show I knew most of the songs by heart and I was singing them for the rest of the night. Their album is available on iTunes.

3. Star Killer – Their hard, industrial brand of rock may not be for housewives or Tony Bennett fans, but Star Killer has landed and brought with them a very fresh and exciting sound that combines elements of Nine Inch Nails, Korn, Marilyn Manson, and P.O.D. Lead singer Jasin Cadic grew up in Edison, NJ and has also starred in The Perfect Age of Rock and Roll. Their EP is available for FREE for a limited time so get your ass to their website.

2. Scarlet Carson – It’s been a long time since our state has had it’s own rockers. I’m not talking about, Bruce, Bon Jovi, or Gaslight Anthem…I’m talking about the glory days of metal, hair bands, and excessive rock, i.e. Motley Crue. It was all about living the rock and roll lifestyle, drinking, and playing shows that made the audience want to fist pump – NOT Jersey Shore style, but because the music simply ROCKED. That’s what these guys are all about and they sum it up as “Dirty Jersey Rock and Roll.”

1. The Dirty Pearls – It’s already been several years since I first saw The Dirty Pearls live and I knew from that moment that they were the only band in recent times, perhaps since Buckcherry, to grasp what rock and roll is all about. If you’ve never heard of the reigning kings of New York City rock and roll, you will when they release their first official full length album, Whether You Like It Or Not in Spring 2011. All you silly-ass Nickelbacky bands and Daughtry soundalikes should go crawl into a hole because there’s about to be a gigantic, sleazy, sexy, hard rock explosion so get the f*ck out of the way!

NJ Band Rapid Fire

This video profile of New Jersey band Rapid Fire comes to you courtesy of Star Ledger videos. Listen to this metal/prog rock band tear it up, but be more in awe that the band members range in age from 14 to 16 years old. Rapid Fire won a contest where they snagged an opening spot at last week’s Bamboozle Festival at The Meadowlands.

Jersey Boy Makes Good…Porn!

Photobucket

And now…get lubed up for The Sexy Armpit’s “long” and amusing Interview with Mike Zute!

ARMPIT: You’ve heard of the old cliché “Jack of all trades” right? Well meet the “Jackhammer of all trades” Mike Zute. (www.MikeZute.com) He’s a music writer, producer, and performer who also somehow has time to make adult films and run a XXX site. So Mike, you head up a successful N.J band, you write songs, you photograph women, and produce your own porn films for sale at (www.NaughtyZuteGirls.com). How the hell do you juggle all those jugs…uhh..I mean jobs?

ZUTE: Jugs, Grapefruits, Melons, Knockers… I don’t even know what the hell I’m doing half the time! Seriously, It’s a true test of organization. And my theory of “If I want to do something then I will do it”… Instead of sitting around wondering what it would be like to have a rock band and a porn site; I spend every spare minute planning and executing my next actions in those said endeavors… Working a day job adds some stress, but the added income eases the stress in the finances needed for these ZUTE projects.

ARMPIT: Mike, are you a lifelong New Jersey native? Some visitors to this site think that my blog is called The Sexy Armpit because I’m into some wacky fetish, but that’s not the case. It’s all about defending the Garden State from all it’s detractors. Quick… off the top of your head…(not that head!) tell us 3 things you love about Jersey. OK, I know it’s hard since there’s so much negative crap so I’ll cut you slack. Give me 2 and then if you can think of 3 I’ll give you an extra website plug lol.

ZUTE: Yes, I was born, raised, and dropped on my head a few times in Jersey! 3 things: #1- The Jersey Shore. I go there a few times every summer. I love to body surf the waves, check out the hot chicks on the beach, and try not to get sunburn. #2- The New York Giants, who play in E. Rutherford, NJ. #3- Great Italian Restaurants and Pizzerias, even though I can’t eat too much cheese because it’s bad for my singing voice!

ARMPIT: Ding Ding Ding…We have a WINNER! www.naughtyzutegirls.com. An erotic convention was supposed to take place in Secaucus NJ recently but the town voted to keep it out of the Meadowlands convention center. Now, it’s slated to take place in Edison NJ. Can you elaborate to the readers of The Sexy Armpit about how ridiculous this is especially because 25 miles away over in Manhattan it wouldn’t be a problem.

ZUTE: An unfortunate failure with Jersey is that a lot of our state’s people are socially retarded and behind the times. Some people still think criminals and child molesters run the porn industry. It’s so the opposite. I basically self taught myself the legalese in this biz, and it was like I put myself through a Law School class. The adult biz is so regulated now, that if you are not an honest, intelligent producer with organized records, the Feds will close down your site / business in no time. Back to the question, The expo can’t offend anyone because it is closed to the general public. You have to pay an admission and “want to be offended” in order to enter. The City of Secaucus loses out on the income they would have made.

ARMPIT: You recently were hanging with Ron Jeremy at an “adult film” convention. Do you feel like you really made it after experiencing that?

ZUTE: I don’t feel as if I’ve “made it” big in the Porn world. I’m just glad I’m good enough (at producing, acting, editing, and promoting) to still be involved in it. A similar feeling drives me to keep it up with my rock band. Ha ha ha, I said “keep it up”!

ARMPIT: Did you always want to get into making porn films or is this something that you just stumbled onto?

ZUTE: Wow, I could go on forever w/ this one. Somewhere around the middle 90’s I started considering it. After the Tommy Lee / Pam Anderson film came out in the later 90’s, I became seriously interested. Seeing how a popular musician and actress boosted their publicity (& income) with a simple amateur sex tape was very inspiring. By the time I had enough funds saved, learned the legal biz factors, and researched potential models, it was 2003. I started making films that year. This was before I even knew how to edit films or how to design a website… (I do have an engineering degree from NJIT, so when I kick myself in the ass, I can really learn and accomplish things.) Anyhow, I also was busy preparing the first lineup of the ZUTE band to play out, so I was stressed to the max. My guitarist at the time kept asking me to let him see some of my porn films… I planned to eventually release this stuff, and I unfortunately trusted him with a copy. He quit the band soon afterward in Summer 2004. He owned the band website domain, so he wanted me to pay him $3000 for the domain name… When I said no way, he published a clip of me getting a blow job (from Isabel) on that site, and he posted all these ridiculous defamatory lies on the screen. Word gets around quick that I’m in an adult film. When I threatened to get the Feds after him for U.S.C. 2257 violations he took the site down. Seeing the hits the site got, I was more upset that I got no income from this! Instead of suing him, I put all my efforts into getting my ZuteGirl Models plan in action. (With the web design help of my new guitarist, Cory) I posted the semi nude Strip down pics of the ZuteGirls on the new band website (MikeZute.com) in early 2005. The goal was to keep the semi nude pics on the ZUTE band site and then put a link to the adult site once I finished designing it. But, too many female fans of the band complained about semi nude pics of chicks on the band’s website. I even put comical semi nude pics of myself on there to draw more attention. The focus was taken away from the music, so I agreed w/ my band members to remove the semi nude pictures, and just keep the “nice” (clothed) Zute Girl pictures on the Band website. I immediately posted some of the semi nude chicks on myspace.com/mikezute… Finally, a few months later in 2005 www.NaughtyZuteGirls.com went live. I put a link to it from the “Nice” ZuteGirls pics page on the band website, which also has its own domain http://www.zutegirls.com/. Simple answer, eh?

ARMPIT: I’ve seen some of your work and I appreciate the unorthodox way you direct your films. You put the girls in little sketches and talk to them in a laid back interview atmosphere. I dig it. Have all the girls said “your command is my wish” or has there been instances where they gave you a hard time about not wanting to do something you asked?

ZUTE: Good Questions. A lot of girls were surprised by the respectful laid back interview. More than once a girl has said to me: “Ok, is this an interview where I’m supposed to say I’m 18, I’ve never been filmed before, I’m a whore and all I ever want to do is suck cock?” Once I tell a girl “No, it’s a real interview and you can say whatever the hell you want,” then she is usually more into the rest of the session because I treated her like a human being. She is now at ease. Once we get to the sex, she is more comfortable with me and performs much more naturally… In terms of the skits, some girls have added input on changing their lines… I am open minded, so if I like her idea, then I let her roll with it…. As far as sex, I’ve had complete cooperation thus far. I haven’t made any girls do any painful positions. So, I’m not sure how they’d react if I was very adamant about an uncomfortable position…

ARMPIT: Before her death last year you featured Haley Paige in one of your films, can you tell us a little about your experience working with her, and how did you feel after hearing of her death?

ZUTE: The stories about her personality are no lie. She really was a sweetheart. She actually showed up late to the session for “Lost Cell Phones Ep #5,” but was very apologetic. She was very easy to work with, and didn’t give me any attitude problems whatsoever. She was calm and collective with a positive attitude throughout the shoot. She liked working the camera on Harmony & I, and she looked forward to directing films in the future. I was very shocked upon hearing about her death. Mostly because she seemed like a girl who was in control of her life. She did not show signs of someone with a drug problem…. How did she end up with that loser who ultimately ended up killing her? (Or if he didn’t directly kill her, he influenced her to get involved with the junk… Wang Dang Dong or whatever the fuck his name is?) I don’t understand…

ARMPIT: You feature some really hot chicks on your site www.NaughtyZuteGirls.com. My favorite happens to be Pamela. Have you ever caught feelings for any of the actresses your working with?

ZUTE: Yeah, Madison Bijou James stands out a lot… She was just so down to earth and took great interest in my original concept, which was to combine modeling and porn in a fun atmosphere… She even sent me a “Thank you for the fuck film” card a few days after that shoot in 11/2004. She has since stopped doing porn and recently had her 2nd kid. She lives in Colorado. Naudia Rio, was really sweet also. Most girls were really cool. Pamela was a little stuck up, because she knew her popularity was growing. There was a different Canadian Chick named Ocean who was a real bitch… Other than her, all the ZuteGirls are really cool.

ARMPIT: Are all your friends and bandmates jealous of you that you get to be with all these hot chicks?

ZUTE: Well first off, I will say that the ex guitarist (who hijacked the first Zute Band website) thought he would destroy both my music and porn careers by posting slanderous crap. He probably did that out of jealousy: The ZUTE band was doing much better without him, and he is way too unattractive to do porn. My success is the best form of revenge against him and other various detractors. Otherwise, my current band mates and male friends have been very cool about my Zute Girl endeavors. If anything, they just joke around about it. I try not to talk about my porn experiences, unless someone specifically asks… On another tangent of this question, I am dating a girl who is very jealous of the ZuteGirl models and wants me to stop doing porn. (Even though she knew I did this before we got sexually involved.)… So, I don’t know what else to say!

ARMPIT: JAY + LACIE HEART = Can you make it happen? Christmas is coming up you know!

ZUTE: If it were only that easy! And she is smokin’ hot! Seriously, I’m only making about 4 films / year, so I’m not consistently working with any one model or modeling agent… Only the huge porn companies have that kind of wealth and power… I’m still the “little guy”, right now. When I get aroused it becomes a slightly bigger little guy…

ARMPIT: If one decides against purchasing the Video On Demand through the site and opts for an old school DVD, Are there Easter eggs on the DVDs? Any cool mysterious hidden crap on there?

ZUTE: I put Original ZUTE band demos in the first few I sold… But then it became tedious and time consuming with the whole process… But now I’ve seen less of DVD sales and much more VOD / (pay per minute) sales… That is definitely the future of the industry.

ARMPIT: Have you developed a trademark sex move or saying? Any crazy upside down shit or anything (i.e. the zute shuffle or the zutinator?)

ZUTE: No trademark move yet, but you’ve got the ideas flowing! In terms of sayings, I’ve been over using the word “indeed” for years… Also, I think at some point in the sex scene of every film I end up saying “You’re such a Naughty Zute Girl.” It seems cliché, but it does fit at the time…. (Of course in my upper head, during sex, I’m often calculating batting averages, trying to remember song lyrics, and mentally reciting the Greek alphabet. Those are my favorite ways to prevent cumming too early!)

ARMPIT: I’ll have to keep those in mind. Or I’ll think of Man-At-Arms banging Oprah Winfrey. The following definitions are taken directly from Urban Dictionary. com. Just as they ask visitors to give a thumbs up and thumbs down to rate the accuracy of each definition can you provide your expert opinion as to the accuracy of these?

1) Another name for a marijuana joint. When its contents are purely cannabis (without any tobacco to pad it out)
ZUTE: maybe

2) marijuana which is grinded so it is thinner so it is easier to smoke. orr half or that zute mate! ZUTE: maybe

3) To be beyond retarded while intoxicated or high
ZUTE: the closest indeed!

ZUTE: I always felt the slang definition of “Zuted” was to be high in good style. Number 3 is a bit extreme on the definition, but hey, if it works for the general public, then fine. Also, I’ve heard that a marijuana joint laced w/ PCP in the 1970’s was referred to as a “Zootie.” Actually, there are other factors that go into why I use the name ZUTE. It sounds a little bit like my last name… Also, in Monty Python, there was a funny scene with the “bad Zute girl.”

ARMPIT: And finally, can you give us any insight to what’s in store for the future of your films? Any spoilers you could give us?

ZUTE: The first anal penetration I’ve performed on film was on Trina Michaels in a threesome film along with Mindy Main. That will be released by late this year or early next year. Also, I’ve produced films of girls doing solo masturbation w/ dildo. I might eventually add another person to work the camera, aside from the girls, the tripod, and me… As far as plots, I already have a different story line from “Lost Cell Phones”, but I won’t count out new Episodes of that series from “popping up” once in while.
Thanks for talking to The Sexy Armpit, Mike! Go check out Mike’s various endeavors, they’re Zutarific! Be sure to visit the adult site at: http://www.naughtyzutegirls.com/ . See Zute the Band playing gigs all over New Jersey! Head over to http://www.mikezute.com/ and
www.Myspace.com/mikezute for more info!