Classic WWF/WWE Event Cards From New Jersey #7

WWE Event card by Jay Amabile 6-18-11
Pretty convincing, huh? I made this in the style of the old WWF Event cards 
that were slipped into the WWF magazine programs at live events. They no longer print
these up so feel free to print your own if you’re going to the show!

This WWE event card can’t possibly be considered classic. So, before you go running your mouth, keep in mind that not only did I create this event card myself in Photoshop, but the event hasn’t even happened yet! You’ll notice the event card lists the matches that will be taking place at Saturday’s WWE show at Izod Center in East Rutherford, NJ. I’m bringing my nephew to his first WWE event so I’m hoping it’s a good one, although I have my doubts. My main objective with making my own WWE event card for this show is to highlight an aspect of WWE that I absolutely abhor.

What makes you want to see a movie? Most times it’s a simple preview trailer that you see before another movie or on TV while other times you may have just heard good things about a film from a friend. Either way, a professional wrestling event is fairly similar to a movie in that way. No matter how much the WWE tries to distance itself from the word “wrestling,” that’s what it is and that’s what it always will be. If there ever comes a day when WWE Superstars actually cease wrestling in a ring, then it will simply become a TV show. But even the best TV shows air previews of their new fall season, their next episode, their season finale, etc. How else will viewers decide if they want to watch? How else will they even know about a new show or an upcoming movie?

Somewhere in the late ’90s, WWE stopped airing their Pay Per View promos that informed the audience all about what matches they would see at the next event. For instance, The Wrestlemania Report, was merely a few minutes and was hosted by Gene Okerlund, Sean Mooney, or Todd Pettengill…take your pick! The reports were fun, well produced, and always geared me up for the next big event. Seeing the card of matches being reported in a serious newsworthy way added significance to the matches. Occasionally just the sheer amount of matches would get me excited.

The modern day WWE could use help in selling their Pay Per Views, so bringing back a report like this would help. I want to know who’s going to be wrestling, why they are wrestling, what belt is on the line, what stipulations are in the match, and drop some history on us about previous bouts involving these competitors. This isn’t rocket science, this is the lowest common denominator! Why do you think people actually read Amazon reviews? Because they are trying to decide whether to buy a product. Why should I buy the WWE’s next piece of shit Pay Per View?

Capitol Punishment is the next WWE event and it happens live this Sunday. Unfortunately, I can only tell you 2 or 3 of the matches. Why is that? Mostly because WWE consistently fails to promote the matches at the next event unless it’s a week before the event, and they’re also miserable at making me care about any of the feuds going on at any time. This time around all we got was an abysmal, choppy, and lame attempt at humor where WWE Superstars were cut into press conference footage with Barack Obama. It told us nothing about the event AT ALL! Until the 2000’s, I was known to get really excited about the upcoming Pay Per Views because the matches were usually must see and WWE touted them as such every chance they had. Even the under cards added value to the events. Nowadays, I turn on Raw without knowing any matches, and it seems like they come up with them as the night goes along. They sure as hell don’t bother telling us what matches are going to happen next week on Raw, that would be too much to ask. Usually they don’t even know themselves.

We WWE fans continue to watch even though we have no idea what’s in store for us. Unless you’re a 6 year old kid like my nephew, you’re probably going to walk away underwhelmed. I suppose they don’t want to back themselves into a corner. I still think that a simple Wrestlemania Report would work better than telling every commentator to say “It’s going to be the GREATEST Wrestlemania in HISTORY,” because they say that every year, they just don’t tell us why it’s going to be.

Grave Digger at Izod Center in East Rutherford

[youtube http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V7YX5XzsyY8?rel=0]

Considering the commercials for it were played during every mid-afternoon cartoon show in the ’80s, I’ve never actually attended a Monster Truck Jam. Grave Digger was created in 1981 and now there’s several Grave Digger trucks with various drivers allowing them to make appearances throughout the country at different times. Grave Digger only faces Bigfoot a few times a year, but the debate over which one is the most popular Monster Truck still rages on. Bigfoot is a few years older than Grave Digger, but Grave Digger has become synonymous with Monster Truck Jams. Monster Truck Jams come to East Rutherford and Trenton NJ annually and tickets are usually reasonable. Although Monster Truck Jams are a notch lower than WWE events, it still seems like a fun day out if you have kids who would enjoy witnessing some vehicular destruction, or for those single desperate guys who like to drool over Ms. Bigfoot! Monster Jam returns to the Izod Center on 2/4/2012.

NJ T-Shirt Tuesday 51: Bon Jovi Hard Rock Signature Series

hard rock,bon jovi,t-shirt,new jersey,atlantic city

It’s fitting that after Bruce Springsteen and The E-Street Band closed Giants Stadium, tomorrow night Bon Jovi will open up The New Meadowlands Stadium in East Rutherford, NJ. Throughout the shiny new facility I’m sure there will be vendors galore selling swag, thongs, cds, hats, bumper stickers, and whatever else they can slap a Bon Jovi logo on, especially T-Shirts.

Recently on a trip down to Atlantic City, I stopped into the Hard Rock Cafe because I read about the exclusive Bon Jovi t-shirt only available at Hard Rock Shops. It’s the 26th edition in a line of Signature tees that Hard Rock began in 1990. The girl behind the counter showed my girlfriend and I the shirt, but it wasn’t impressive.

Since the Have a Nice Day Tour, Bon Jovi shirts have been extremely lame. During the bands heyday their shirts were just as cool as other hairbands of the era. Now all you see on the front of their tees are crosses, flowers, smiley faces, hearts, and yes…GRAPES! This is not a joke, that is what makes up any Bon Jovi t-shirt you see for sale, unless it’s vintage from eBay. The band opted to veer away from skulls and gangsters in favor of more women and children friendly designs which are frankly, WEAK. All of the characteristics of a typical Bon Jovi shirt are here, mainly the one that screams “If you’re a dude you should NEVER be wearing this shirt!” To add that extra special something that your wardrobe of other Jovi shirts may not have, there’s a silkscreen of Jon’s autograph on the bottom right of the logo!

Out of the $26.00 dollars you’re asked to shell out for this tee, 15% of the profits will go to the Jon Bon Jovi Soul Foundation, which will help create “affordable housing to those in need.” The Soul Foundation concentrates on serving the greater Philadelphia area rather than New Jersey, the state that provided the title for the band’s 4th album. There are still plenty of run down, low income parts of New Jersey, but no that’s fine Jon, go help the people in Philadelphia, the city that you didn’t grow up in.

www.jonbonjovisoulfoundation.org

Other Bon Jovi T-Shirt Tuesday Installments:
NJ T-Shirt Tuesday 13
NJ T-Shirt Tuesday 48

Madonna in New Jersey: “Into The Groove” – Blond Ambition Tour 1990

Recently, Madonna lent her music to Fox’s show Glee, and I inadvertently caught bits and pieces of it. I’m sorry if you love the show, but it’s fairly cheesy. Don’t get me wrong, Jane Lynch is hysterical, but the rest of the show just reminds me of a hipper version of High School Musical. The episode I saw, “The Power of Madonna,” had the cast performing Madonna’s big hits and recreating her videos throughout the show, but I would much rather hear the real thing.

I headed over to trusty YouTube and found a clip of Madonna performing one of my favorite songs of hers in New Jersey! It’s “Into The Groove,” from the East Rutherford, NJ stop on the Blond Ambition Tour in June of 1990 which took place at the Meadowlands Arena (aka Izod Center). If you can get past the banter at the beginning, it’s a damn fine performance, just as Madonna’s usually are. Also, it’s obvious that Lady Gaga’s style in the prison scene in her video for “Telephone” is clearly inspired by Blond Ambition era Madonna.

I’ll admit that I wanted to maul Madonna when I was a kid. It was abnormal because while most of my friends were tossing around a baseball with their friends, I was tossing in videocasettes of Desperately Seeking Susan, Who’s That Girl, and The Virgin Tour VHS tape to ogle my future wife. I don’t regret not throwing the baseball around since I knew I wasn’t MLB bound, but I chalked it up to the fact that all my Madonna “research” may come in handy someday when I’m older and I need to write a blog post about one of Madonna’s performances in New Jersey.

Ad Jerseum 6: Playboy Great Gorge Resort and Country Club

Ad Jerseum: So much Jersey advertising it’ll make you vomit!

new jersey,hugh hefner

This vintage ad for Playboy’s Great Gorge Resort and Country Club in McAfee, NJ 
appeared in the pages of Playboy Magazine in approximately 1976/1977
If you can read all that fine print, you might be struck odd by how frequently they egg you on to bring your kids with you on your getaway throughout this ad. C’mon, would you really want to bring your kids to the Playboy resort? Hey Hubby, you could kiss your sexy adult alone time goodbye when wifey decides to bring little Bobby and Suzy along for the trip. Talk about a buzzkill. Ahh, who cares, at least when the old ball and chain is asleep with the kids you could sneak down to the Bunny Hutch Disco! Now the party is ON! Bunnies, Beefeater, and Bush, that’s what the ’70s were all about.
Were people that hard up for good babysitters back then? Well, the Playboy Club had no problem finding babysitters, they even had their own fleet of them. I’ll tell you one thing, if I was a kid when this place was in operation I would have begged my parents to go there just to be in the same vicinity as the bunnies! In fact, I have reason to believe that the babysitters may have moonlighted as Bunnies! Shhh! Don’t tell anyone! Babysitter by day, Playboy Bunny by night! Quick, get me some financing for this production!
Even by today’s high standards of mega resorts, this place is still very impressive. Aside from all its other amenities, Great Gorge had the world’s largest whirlpool, a THREE LEVEL GAME ROOM, and The Red Rumbler Slide, whatever the hell that was it still sounds rad. Maybe the ill fated Xanadu in East Rutherford could take a cue from Great Gorge and it can become Playboy’s next monstrous indoor resort. Now I demand it. Look at how convincing this ad is, it’s 34 years old and it’s still enticing me to make reservations, I better hurry though because these prices are only effective until October 31st, 1977.
Recently I posted a fantastic postcard from Playboy’s Great Gorge Resort and Country Club: Great Gorge: Vagina Euphemism or Playboy’s Enchanting NJ Getaway?

Classic WWF/WWE Event Cards from New Jersey #6

wwf,wwe,wrestling,new jersey,meadowlands

Following Royal Rumble ’94, Undertaker went bye bye. After losing his casket match at the Rumble to Yokozuna, he (or someone made up to look like him) literally floated up to the rafters of the arena. When Undertaker returned by Summerslam ’94, he faced an Undertaker impostor who The “Million Dollar Man” Ted DiBiase claimed was the real phenom. The real Undertaker defeated his doppleganger and all was well in the WWE Universe, or so we thought.

Back in the ’80s and ’90s, the WWF was a much different place than it is now. Pay Per View events only took place a handful of times throughout the year, which left several months of anticipation and live house shows to build up the excitement for the next huge event. The pay per view events were filled with drama and action, and none of it was spoiled by the modern day method of blowing their load on Raw and Smackdown. House shows back in the day were even more interesting because if you attended one, you almost felt as if you were in on something that only the people in the specific arena were privy to. Most of the time nothing groundbreaking happened, but once in a while something very cool or spur of the moment occurred. For instance, Diesel won his first WWF championship at a house show shortly after Survivor Series ’94, but the event we’ll be discussing today, The WWF Hart Attack Tour, was pretty routine. It all went down at The Meadowlands Arena in East Rutherford, NJ on Thursday, October 27th, 1994.

As a build up for Survivor Series 1994, The Hart Attack Tour featured a double main event. In what technically should have been the main event since it was for the WWF Championship, (before there were two main title belts) Bret “Hitman” Hart took on his former Hart Foundation tag team partner Jim “The Anvil” Neidhart. The other main event pitted The Undertaker vs. Yokozuna, which gave Taker a chance to exact some revenge on Yokozuna for beating him in the casket match several months prior at the Rumble. It also served as a nice build up for their rematch casket match at the upcoming Survivor Series.

The amazing thing about this card is that the two main events feature 2 WWE Superstars who are main attractions at Wrestlemania 26 which will take place later today in Phoenix, Arizona. It’s wild to think that with all the talented mofos in WWE like John Morrison, R-Truth, Christian, and others, that the WWE opts to feature Superstars who were headlining events back in 1994. Way to keep the new talent down Vince, you basterd! As for the rest of the card, not many of them compete on a scale as grand as the WWE anymore. If anything, you’ll be able to see guys like Doink the Clown, Tatanka, and Billy Gunn on the indy circuit, and chances are you’ll see one of them get inducted to the WWF Hall of Fame somewhere down the line. Jerry “The King” Lawler, I.R.S aka Mike Rotunda, and Abe “Knuckleball” Schwartz aka Steve Lombardi are still employed by WWE in various capacities.

The 1-2-3 Kid, aka X-Pac, appeared recently in TNA, but the others seem to have disappeared. Where has the obscenely awesome Adam Bomb been? Full fledged Bomb Squad members such as myself deserve to know! Lex Luger has been in a quadriplegic state for several years. And of course, we know that the Beast from the East, Bam Bam Bigelow left us too soon.

NJ T-Shirt Tuesday 38: New Jersey Nets

nba,t-shirt,nets,new jersey
NJ Nets Charcoal Flame Thrower T-Shirt by Adidas
You have probably heard by now that the worst team in the NBA may be gracing Newark’s Prudential Center with their shittyness for the next 2 seasons. “THANK THE FRIGGING LORD!” said Izod Center earlier today. The deal is not completely official, it’s merely waiting to be passed by new Governor Chris Christie. No big loss, the Nets are OUTTA’ HERE and hauling their asses off to Brooklyn, NY in 2012. The question remains whether or not New Jersey will opt to attract another franchise from the NBA to The Garden State. With an embarrasing record of 4-42, I’m going with a resounding NO on that one. As far as I’m concerned Brooklyn is doing us a huge favor and we should cut our losses. Unless of course The Nets play the best two seasons in team history at The Prudential Center…then GO NETS!!!

NJ T-Shirt Tuesday 33: Springsteen Wrecks the Stadium

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It’s a good thing we’ve got Springsteen, because the New York Giants sure as hell didn’t come through for us this season. Couldn’t they have at least won their last game in Giants Stadium? And while I’m at it, are the G-Men really moving on to greener pastures? I’d say that playing in “The New Meadowlands Stadium” is a step down in comparison to having an entire stadium named after the Giants franchise for over 30 years. From now on, the Giants and Jets will have to share a stadium that’s generically named so it won’t offend Jets fans. Big Blue couldn’t end it all on a high note? Nope, instead they let the Carolina Panthers trounce them. It’s a good thing my woman got us tickets to see Bruce Springsteen and the E-Street band put on the last concert ever in Giants Stadium back on October 9th, 2009.

Bruce Springsteen T-Shirts
Bruce Springsteen and The E-Street Band’s final shows at Giants Stadium were commemorated with different variations of t-shirts that were available in honor of each night’s show.
I feel that BRUUUCE bid the stadium proper adieu by bringing on his own “Wrecking Ball.” If you were there, then you know how special the night was. Emotions ran high that night and Bruce was in great spirits. He uplifted the crowd in many ways, and the crowd even uplifted him when he randomly decided to stage dive. Nobody, not even the drunken buffoonery in Jersey would drop Bruce Springsteen. That’s like dropping the Queen of effing England, if for some reason she happened to be stage diving. God might not save the Queen in that instance. The last night of Springsteen’s concerts in Giants Stadium was more special than the previous shows because as far as concerts go, he’s the main event there. The spectacular show was only weakened by the fact that the G-Men’s new digs was only 50 feet away next door. But Bon Jovi can have the shiny new New Meadowlands Stadium. I prefer old, weathered, and worn in any day.
Bruce Springsteen T-Shirts
You can visit Bruce Springsteen’s official online store and grab these tees while they are still available! (www.brucespringsteen.net)

WWE SummerSlam 1989 at The Meadowlands Arena

summerslam 89

It was the year Indiana Jones went on his Last Crusade, it was also the year that brought us the sequel to Ghostbusters, and the first Batman movie since 1966. In the news we saw the Exxon Valdez Oil spill, Ted Bundy was executed in an electric chair, and the WWF was brave enough to stage their first pay per view event in the swamps of East Rutherford, New Jersey.

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In my world, it wasn’t too soon after Summerslam ’89 that the ’80s wrestling blitz would begin to take a nosedive. I’ve been a loyal WWF/WWE fan since ’83, and never got caught up in the terrible mess that was WCW. Once the WWE proudly slid into 1990, it was obvious to true fans that the stories and ideas were beginning to run out of steam. Not to worry, because today we’re taking you back to ’89 when I was still a fan revelling in the drama and action created by these larger than life characters.

20 years ago, the 2nd SummerSlam marked the first time a live Pay Per View event would emanate from The Meadowlands Arena, then known as Brendan Byrne Arena. The Pay Per View intro was spectacular and made you want to jump into your TV set and inhale the exciting atmosphere. The SummerSlam music and logo graphics were the ones you got used to seeing, not some crazy trendy looking logo that bears no resemblance to the original and has no history tied to it like this years.

The Coliseum Video VHS copy of SummerSlam ’89 contains an intro that shows fans filing into the Meadowlands Arena, buying t-shirts, and a kickass little kid doing his best Ravishing Rick Rude impression. I was pissed when I bought the WWE SummerSlam Anthology DVD and this intro was completely cut out. Those minute details of the VHS release helped me remember the era. When the SummerSlam events were edited for the new Anthology, those scenes probably seemed unimportant and easily discarded. Seriously WWE, is saving 1 minute of time really that precious? The fans want the versions that they watched over and over again at home or rented from the video store, not some chopped up version. Thanks to YouTube member neilsmith207, we’re able to see the original introduction filmed in East Rutherford NJ.

For the first time since Rocky III, Hogan was on the big screen in No Holds Barred, which happened to be “the greatest movie of all time” if you asked me after I saw it. I remember my Dad taking me to the theater to see it, and it was such an event. My dad was quite a trooper when I was a kid, always taking me to WWE live events, fan festivals, and even shlocky movies starring Hulk Hogan and Kurt Fuller. WWE had a perfect opportunity to capitalize on the film’s feud between Tiny Lister and Rip (Hogan). WWE passed it off that Hogan and Zeus had real conflict on the set and it fell out into the WWE ring, making a perfect main event for SummerSlam. Hogan teamed up with his best bud Brutus The Barber Beefcake, to take on the fierce combo of The Macho King and Zeus with Sensational Sherri in their corner. To vote on the petition to get No Holds Barred onto an official DVD release, check out the bottom right of this page.

Jesse the Body Ventura and Tony Schiavone handled the commentary. Schiavone’s voice had energy and enthusiasm, but I still missed Heenan’s sarcasm and one liners, and Monsoon’s familiar voice and sayings like “it is deafening in here,” and “…the anticipation, you can cut it with a knife.”

red rooster

Summerlsam 89 was a solid event that kicked off with The Hart Foundation vs. The Brain Busters, and followed up with Dusty Rhodes vs. The Honky Tonk Man. I had no interest in Dusty Rhodes when I was kid, I just didn’t get his shtick. He didn’t have that special sheen that Vince helped create in his wrestlers. Dusty was a guy from “that other company” that I only read about in the black and white pages of Pro Wrestling Illustrated. He sure got the crowd pumped up though. I just scratched my head when I saw an older, overweight bleach blonde guy wearing yellow polka dots dancing around in the ring. It didn’t make much sense to me. I think if I grew up in the ’70s I might understand his appeal. Thrown for a loop after losing the match and getting hit in the head with his own guitar, Honky Tonk cut one of his funniest promos ever, acting completely like Elvis trying to get to his concert. “Somebody help me find the stage!”

Undefeated Mr. Perfect takes on…yes…wait for it…”The Red Rooster” Terry Taylor! Remember what I was saying about the WWF’s nosedive? Even as a kid, I wasn’t thinking about math tests, or little league, I was thinking “what the cluck was wrong Vince McMahon letting this gimmick get on TV?” I knew something was amiss when I saw Terry Taylor poking his head forward and back like a rooster with his red spiked hair. What a debacle. I don’t know what was more unnerving to me even at that age, an overweight middle aged guy wearing yellow polka dots and a police hat, or the fact that they tried to put a guy over as a rooster. The late great Mr. Perfect won the match, and as Jesse the Body said, “Mr. Perfect stays Perfect.”

In six-man tag action, The Rougeau Brothers and Rick Martel with Slick and Jimmy Hart took on the action packed team of The Rockers and Tito Santana. Santana is one of the most underrated Superstars in WWE history, and now he owns a hair salon in NJ! The Rougeaus and Martel got the W.

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Ultimate Warrior was interviewed about his heated feud with Ravishing Rick Rude and he had this to say: “…Ravishing Rick Rude as i promised you will surrender to the gods above as i beat you ONE, TWO, THREEE!!!” Rude entered the ring and grabbed the mic: “What I’d like to have right now is for all you fat, out of shape, SummerSlam sweathogs to keep the noise down while I take my robe off and show the ladies what a reeeaal sexy man looks like, hit the music…” Rude’s robe dropped to reveal The Warrior’s face on his airbrushed tights. During the bout, Rowdy Roddy Piper appeared at ringside and lifted his kilt to moon Rude. Warrior took advantage of a distracted Rude and won the Intercontinental belt back only to swing it over his head like a complete maniac. Careful, those things are like $300 bro.

Duggan Demolition

Hacksaw Jim Duggan and Demolition? What a ragtag group that is. Demolition was so much more effective as heels. It doesn’t seem possible that these guys could subdue 3 behemoths such as Andre the Giant, Akeem, and Big Boss Man but they were going to try. Jesse The Body ranted about Duggan’s face paint: “how disrespectful to the flag of America to have it on that ugly face.” Duggan’s 2×4 sealed the deal and scored the win for Demolition and Hacksaw.

The match between Hercules and Greg Valentine was an excuse to beef up the heat between Ronnie Garvin (who was curiously serving as ring announcer) and Greg “The Hammer” Valentine. Unbeknownst to the ref, Valentine put his feet on the ropes to secure the pin and got the 3 count. Regardless, Garvin announced Herc as the winner. BTW- who greenlit the “Garvin Stomp?”

Here, Sherri, Savage, and Zeus cut a promo by “the cauldron of madness” that would help them destroy Hulk and Brutus:

Superfly Jimmy Snuka took on The Million Dollar Man Ted DiBiase. Snuka was counted out during a scuffle with Virgil on the outside of the ring.

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Superfly soars through the air to get retribution.

According to Hogan in an interview with Mean Gene, he was on his way to the Meadowlands on his Harley, and his 24-inch pythons parted the Hudson River on his way to get onto I-95. Hogan and Brutus discussed their secret weapon and doing some struttin’ and cuttin’.

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Miss Elizabeth was introduced to even the playing field. As soon as she entered the ring, Jesse Ventura buries Elizabeth and proves why he was the best color guy WWE ever had: “She’s a little gold digger, Randy Savage made her what she is today. She was a hashslinger down the street in Jersey.” The main event had a predictable, yet satisfyingly fun result. Hogan hit Zeus in the face with Sherri’s purse, then a body slam, and ended it with the leg drop for the win. Then Hogan hit Scary Sherri with an atomic drop, and as she stumbled, Elizabeth hit her in the face with Sherri’s own purse. Next, The Barber took his hedge clippers and snipped off the end of Sherri’s pre-cut hair extensions.