You should only be allowed to wear the Coaster Hero t-shirt from Six Flags Great Adventure if you’ve rode every roller coaster in the park. But what if you can’t make it to Jackson, New Jersey to even attempt that sinuous feat? Well, technologically we’re probably not far away from having a video game chair in our homes that can simulate the same thrilling feeling of a roller coaster. Years ago, games like Sim Coaster and Roller Coaster Tycoon gave us the chance to design our own virtual coasters. Now that we’ve moved well passed Windows 95, who knows where technology will bring us? Rocking out with Guitar Hero for the past several years has been quite a trip so maybe we’ll be able to buy a game that lets us “ride” any coaster in the world in the comfort of our own homes. Or does The Sharper Image have that already?
1) Link to the person who tagged you.
2) Post the rules on your blog.
3) Write six random things about yourself.
4) Tag six people at the end of your post and link to them.
5) Let each of the six persons know they’ve been tagged and leave a comment on their blog.
6) Let the tagger know when your entry is up.
The only pets I’ve ever owned were a bird and fish. I would love to own a dog or cat but ultimately something always hinders me. Could it be because the bird and the fish died? It feels like a pet wasn’t meant for me even though I’d love some cuddly Gizmo type creature to hang out with when I get home from work. I’ve been looking into adopting a genetically engineered purple lynx named Bubastis. Hopefully Craigslist will have one…
I’d like to do all of my traveling within the U.S via a Winnebago a la Lone Star. Many people I talk to put so much emphasis on visiting other countries, and I can understand why. There’s an abundance of beautiful places and cultures to discover around the world, but we in the U.S forget about our own 50 states. I love California, especially San Diego and Los Angeles. I would own property there if I had $$$. I’m thinking of borrowing Lone Star’s Winnebago and enlisting Barf to pilot the thing. Once we get some Jovi cranking, I’ll grab a few of my friends and make our way around the country. If Lone Star won’t give up his ride, then I’ll hit up David and see if he’ll let me borrow his alien ship Max from Flight of the Navigator. At the end of our country wide tour we’ll make our way home, which for my entire life has been right here in The Sexy Armpit aka New Jersey.
I have 3 tattoos and if they weren’t so damn expensive I’d have at least 3 more. Presently, a lightning bolt resides on my left shoulder, there’s a burst of flames shooting up from my lower abdomen, and I have a star with green fire on my right bicep. Both of my ears are pierced – my left ear has 2. There was no rhyme or reason to that, I just gave up on piercing after a while. I’d love to have my lower lip pierced on one side, (not in the center) I think it looks cool but my boss at work nixed the idea. In today’s world it doesn’t seem like a big deal considering all the different wacky things people are doing, but it’s a corporate environment so there’s supposed to be some sort of decorum. Boooo!
I’ve been working out since I was 13 but I despise every second of it. I’m not one of those people who is all smiles after a workout. Sure, the endorphin rush makes me feel good, but who in their right mind wants to work out? Isn’t it so much more fun to vegetate, eat some snacks on the couch, and watch TV after a grueling day at work? I have to literally drag myself to the gym after work and it’s only a short trip down the street from my place! I actually do enjoy running and riding my bike, but only if it’s not cold outside. I’ve become quite the pussy over the years. Oh yeah…and I still watch cartoons and wrestling so SUCK IT!
I don’t ski, snowboard, rollerblade, or take part in rugby, but I do enjoy playing Guitar Hero and Rock Band. My Rock Band 2 band name is The Big Titheads. I played for 3 hours straight the other night. I’ve got some pretty rad hair and a ridiculously slim waistline. It looks totally unhealthy come to think of it. I’m really into the hot female drummer I’ve enlisted. She’s got blonde hair with pink highlights and long pigtails. I don’t find it strange at all that I’m attracted to a girl made of pixels, they make those chicks hot on purpose! One of my favorite songs to play is “Pump it Up” by Elvis Costello, among others. I’ve also come to realize that my pinkies are completely useless.
Jason at Sonic Dork
On Friday Night March 6th, at the Borgata in Atlantic City NJ, the Last Vegas from Chicago easily upstaged Theory of a Deadman and Hinder. I could’ve left after the Last Vegas, that’s how good their performance was. I felt so revved up and satisfied; it was exactly how one should feel after seeing a kickass rock band live. The headliners, Motley Crue, were still to come! Waiting through the next two bands wasn’t easy.
With only a few above average songs, Theory of a Deadman was passable. They seem to play by the book with no shenanigans. I always considered them a much cooler version of Nickleback. No offense to the legions of Nickleback fans, but perhaps you should make the switch? You went from Starbucks to Dunkin’ Donuts, Myspace to Facebook, so how about Nickleback to Theory of a Deadman?
Dear Mr. Winkler,You’re clearly seeing the effects of the rock and roll lifestyle. Singing all those mindless songs about drinking, and getting stoned (i.e “Get Stoned”) will take it’s toll. Life imitates art as they say. Unless you’re in the gym constantly “working on your fitness,” then you’re going to get a nice big beer gut. Oh what do you know, you already have one! oops. I couldn’t stop thinking that if Peter Delouise played a washed up, drunken rock star, who sported a bob haircut in a real life biopic on the Lifetime channel, it might be about you. Put the beer down, step away from the Nascar race on your 70 inch LCD, and get your ass to the gym.You need to work hard to connect with the audience. Humble yourself. Remember, you are opening for MOTLEY CRUE. You are eons away from ever being as big as the legendary Motley Crue. Be mindful that many of the people in the audience have no idea who you are. Plenty of fans of ’80s rock swore off listening to new music when grunge rolled around. It’s your job to win them back! Stop writing generic, ’80s style music. Show us why you’re not just a bunch of guys who “thought it would be cool to be in a band.”
Motley seemed to be having sound problems during their performance. Nikki and Vince kept looking over to the sound guys and giving the “UP” signs. It was basically the same set as their show at PNC Bank Arts Center in the summer. You can watch 2 videos I shot from that show on The Sexy Armpit Youtube page. Motley added “Jailhouse Rock” and “White Trash Circus” into their set.
I’m being a real slacker lately so I’ve put together a post that will highlight some cool shit that I’ve found while clicking around the Internet. I’m sure you’ve heard of some of these, while others maybe not. There will be more posts on the way from The Sexy Armpit.com, and the very first, limited edition, SEXY ARMPIT T-Shirts are COMING SOON!
For years I have been trying to invent a robot that wheeled itself around asking “Do you want ketchup on that” And if you said yes then it’s crazy robot hands would flip up and start squirting ketchup at you…or if you’re lucky…on your fries or burger. Once I figured out that I had no skills in science in any way I put that idea to rest, probably for the better. It was just a chance discovery to find this item, it’s no robot, but at least it attempts to bring condiments up to the FUN level that they should always be at. Introducing: THE CONDIMENT GUN!
The price of this collectible has jettisoned through the entire space time continuum and came BACK and it’s still ridiculously expensive. Even cowboy hats and Mary Steenburgen couldn’t make this baby affordable. Great Scott! It’s your very own Flux Capacitor!
If you ever aspired to be Jack Burton from Big Trouble in Little China, like I did after I saw the movie when I was a kid then you need the shirt he wore in the film. Found Item Clothing has one of the best replicas of the shirt I’ve seen yet.
When I was a young Masters of the Universe freak, I was never too happy wielding a half a toy power sword while I forced my dad to carry the other half which belonged to Skeletor. It was a great gimmick to put the two halves together but one side was silver and the other was florescent yellow. I always hoped to get a power sword of my own, I even contemplated getting one tattooed on me but I figured I’d get a huge RED “G” (for geek) burned into my arm by the townspeople. That brings us to just a few years ago when the new Masters of the Universe cartoon came on Cartoon Network. The resurgence of the He-Man toy line and collectibles soared, (or ZOARED! lol) but the power sword changed and got all mechanical on us. I couldn’t stand the look of it since it was pretty far from the sleek and simple design of the original sword. To my dismay, Kingdom of Swords carried the replica of the new complicated power sword, but they also carry THE LIGHT UP SWORD OF OMENS from THUNDERCATS! This is CRAZY COOL, PEOPLE! I don’t think you understand the magnitude….just click the link and you will!
I heard about this next link on Attack of the Show. Just in case you missed it, I’ll repeat it here: GH Skinz is a skins site for your Guitar Hero guitar and drum kits. These skins will spruce up your guitar if you already haven’t plastered stickers and other foreign objects all over it already.
If you’re imaginary intergalactic adventures aren’t quite up to par lately, why don’t you buck up some dataries (try almost 6,000) and splurge on your very own life size protocol and astromech droids? Fuck yeah!
This last one is purely for those who enjoy a constant state of regression, like I do. When you grow frustrated with your life, job, wife, etc. Make a SNO-CONE from the Snoopy Sno-Cone Machine! I had one when I was a little kid and I remember making the Sno-Cones with my mom and sister and they never lived up to the hype that you got watching the ads for it. I think the process was more fun, and the anticipation of how good I thought it was going to be. Ahh, what the hell, let’s get one for the condo!