12 Fictional Bands That I Didn’t Mention on Nerd Lunch Episode 170

The Nerd Lunch Podcast Episode 170 is now available for download! It’s all about fictional/fake bands from various forms of entertainment. Tim Lybarger, CT, Pax, and myself offer some of our favorites and then later in the show we try to guess some really obscure selections! After you listen, check out my list of fictional bands below that I didn’t get a chance to mention on the podcast.

12. Danger Kitty, Discover Card Commercial, 2001
They’ve been enjoying the biggest success of their career as Steel Panther, and to think they started as a cover band playing ’80s hair band songs in Los Angeles! Originally they were known as Metal Shop, and then Metal Skool and they gained quite a following, now, as Steel Panther they’re touring the world, literally. Everyone loves a some good, tight zebra skin spandex and vagina jokes. Early on, the band appeared as Danger Kitty in a Discover Card commercial where they played a kids Bar Mitzvah. In 2001, at their website, you could get a CD single of the track they played in the commercial called “Love Rocket,” and you can imagine that I requested mine in about .02 milliseconds. Of course, I still have it and have been obsessed with the band ever since.

11. Arsenal, Rock of Ages Musical, 2005-present
Rock of Ages has been a staple musical since 2005 in various parts of the country and touring all over the world. The show spawned a 2012 film adaptation which I still haven’t watched in fear that it’s nowhere near as good as the stage show. The main band in the show is Arsenal and they play actual ’80s arena rock tunes, but what makes them so special to me is that all of the stops on their fictional first tour were to random New Jersey towns! If you want to see proof, I have their original promotional t-shirt and there are photos in my review of the off Broadway production from 2008. This early incarnation of ROA reviewed here was the best before they started tweaking the story, characters, and actors.

10. The Barbusters, Light of Day, 1987
The band in this rock drama is comprised of Michael J. Fox and Joan Jett in one hell of an oddball mash up. The title track was written by Bruce Springsteen. Bon Jovi also appears on the soundtrack.

9. The Lost Soulz, The Perfect Age of Rock n Roll
This rock and roll road movie was filmed partly in New Jersey and my friend Jasin Cadic from the band Starkiller co-wrote it! Check out my review from when it was released.

8. Black Roses, 1988
A monstrous metal band turns everyone into monsters – quite a masterpiece. I recommend adding it to your Halloween time viewing if you haven’t done so in the past. Tracks like “Dance on Fire” and “Soldiers of the Night,” are staples of my Fall playlists. Bands that appear on this rare soundtrack include Lizzy Borden and King Kobra.

7. Vesuvius, The Rocker, 2008
For a while I was watching The Rocker at least 3 times a week. That’s what happens when HBO gets a hold of a new movie. Rainn Wilson and Christina Applegate star in the comedy, but it’s a who’s who of comedic actors such as Fred Armisen, Will Arnett, and Jeff Garlin. It’s well worth your time if you are into silly comedies about rock bands like Spinal Tap. The direct result of watching this movie constantly: I was obsessed with “Promised Land” and listened to it on loop on the way to work for several months. The tunes by Vesuvius are attributed to singer Keith England and his band Lazlo Bane.

6. Stillwater, Almost Famous, 2000
A young music journalist embarks on tour with his favorite band Stillwater to document their exploits for a possible published spot in a rock magazine. Said to be based off of the early years of director Cameron Crowe’s life. I’ve had a couple of Stillwater songs on my iPod ever since I owned an iPod. The authentic track, “Fever Dog,” it sounds like it was a lost track made recorded in the mid ’70s, and it’s not surprising because the Stillwater songs were written by Crowe, his ex-wife Nancy Wilson of Heart, and Peter Frampton which helped give it that special vintage sound. Although the film did not knock ’em dead at the box office, the soundtrack won a Grammy for best soundtrack/compilation.

5. Dyver Down from Holliston, 2013
Used mostly for comic relief, the Van Halen tribute band Dyver Down, lead by Lance Rocket (Dee Snider) actually has a track available on iTunes called “Love It Down Your Throat” and a schlocky, badass music video to go along with it. This was my favorite aspect of the show, well, this and Laura Ortiz of course.

4. Mouthfeel and Juggernaut, Gettin’ The Band Back Together
You’re almost guaranteed not to be familiar with these next bands, (it’s a twofer, I cheated) but you will be soon if all goes well. I was lucky enough to see the play getting the band back together with Miss Sexy Armpit at the George Street Playhouse in New Brunswick in its early phase. It’s been rumored for a while now that it’s on making it’s way to Broadway. If this happens, you may be seeing Rock of Ages take a back seat because that is how funny and entertaining this play is. The comedy/rock musical hybrid is about, you guessed it, a guy who gets his band back together to save his home and neighborhood. They get into a battle of the bands which pits the evil Mouthfeel against the rock heroes in Juggernaut. The original songs are ’80s arena rock style and a select few are available on iTunes. Unfortunately the self titled track “Mouthfeel” isn’t available. I hope Mouthfeel’s tracks make it to the Broadway show otherwise I’m protesting in ’80s hair band attire.

3. Eddie and the Cruisers, 1983
This Jersey classic is possibly one of the most successful fictitious band songs ever. “On The Dark Side,” by John Cafferty and the Beaver Brown Band, scored a number one hit on the Mainstream Rock singles and reached number 7 on the Billboard Hot 100. The sequel, Eddie and the Cruisers II: Eddie Lives, arrived in 1989.

2. Tears of Blood, Disney’s Wizards of Waverly Place
If you follow me on Twitter, you may have read about how my life has spun out of control ever since Netflix removed Wizards of Waverly Place from their streaming service. I was completely devastated. It was like a punch in the gut! It’s one of my favorite shows of all time and it never fails to make me happy. One minor aspect of the show references a rock band called Tears of Blood. They get mentioned in a bunch of episodes and there’s even a poster that shows up on the wall in one scene. TOB is crazy popular with the teenage crowd within the universe of the show. They even get mentioned in other Disney shows which was always surprising considering the very un-Disney-like name of one of their tracks, “Crying Blood for You.” I can’t be certain anyone has actually heard their music though. If anyone has Tears of Blood music, send it my way!

1. The Hex Girls, Scooby Doo
Scooby Doo fans are ultra familiar with this “eco-goth rock band.” You can see and hear them perform in several Scooby outings, but I suggest you check out the Mystery Inc. episode “In Fear of the Phantom” while it’s still streaming on Netflix. In it, Daphne joins the band as a temporary new member, Crush, voiced by the lovely Grey DeLisle-Griffin. Look out for the influences of Phantom of the Opera, Phantom of the Paradise, and an awesome little surprise cameo from Vincent Van Ghoul from the 13 Ghosts of Scooby Doo!

Who are some of your favorite fictional bands? Leave ’em in the comments! Thanks for reading!

The Perfect Age of Rock n Roll Hits ON DEMAND Tomorrow!

[youtube http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ImvUnsldJDg?rel=0]

The Sexy Armpit has just set up a nice little Friday evening for you. Order some pizza, pour yourself about a half gallon of Jack Daniels, and then pick up your remote control. You’ll merely be a few finger strokes away from finally being able to see the movie I’ve been telling you about for a long time now! Available to you in the comfort of your own butt cheek indented couch is: The Perfect Age of Rock n Roll! You can also go old school and see it in an actual movie theater (Village East Cinema), but either way you’ll be supporting a fine film that’s a favorite of mine and also has connections to New Jersey. For more info and movie theater show times – LIKE it on Facebook! By the way, it’s rated R…for Rock n Roll! (couldn’t resist)

The Perfect Age of Rock n Roll

Perfect Age of Rock n Roll Premieres!

In theaters and ON Demand August 5th!

Long time readers of The Sexy Armpit will recall me posting about the film The Perfect Age of Rock n Roll. I’m excited to announce that the film is finally getting it’s official release! I was lucky enough to see it a few years back at a private screening and be the first to review the film. After tracking the evolution of the film and hearing about it’s awards at film fests and other positive feedback, I’m pleased that it will finally be released for all to see. Congratulations to Scott Rosenbaum, Joe White, and the rest of the cast and crew who poured their heart and “Lost Soulz” into this project.

The Perfect Age of Rock n Roll is about the erratic relationship between 2 band mates (Jason Ritter and Kevin Zegers) and how their music has brought them back together on a journey across the country. On the way they discover their rock and roll roots as well as get involved with the same woman (Taryn Manning). As I said in my review, this ain’t the Partridge Family! The title of the film represents the idyllic age of 27, an age at which many famous rock musicians died such as Hendrix, Joplin, and Morrison to name a few.

If you’re a music fan, especially rock, metal and the blues, you will dig this movie. It’s for guys and girls alike so you can watch it with your boyfriend or girlfriend. The original songs on the soundtrack by Steve Conte and Andrew Hollander kick so much ass and I recommend downloading them for a reasonable price on iTunes. After seeing the movie the songs will definitely be stuck in your head.

For the Jersey aficionados like me, many scenes were filmed in Jersey. You might not realize that Jersey isn’t all fist pumping and juiced up guidos, we also offer line dancing and mechanical bull rides at The Colorado Cafe, which happens to serve as one of the clubs the band plays at in the film. The film’s co-writer is New Jersey born Jasin Cadic who is also the lead signer of the metal/industrial band Star Killer and the director of The Dirty Pearls latest video for “Who’s Coming Back To Who.” Be sure to check it out in the comfort of your own home ON Demand on August 5th!

For showtimes, tickets, and to download the free poster:

“Reboot, Rebound…”


You’re probably thinking that this post will compare and contrast the finer points of the Canadian CGI cartoon ReBoot that aired in the mid ’90s with Martin Lawrence’s 2005 theatrical tour de force Rebound. I’ll tell you this: You’re completely f’n wrong! This post will merely serve as an update as to what The Sexy Armpit has been up to as of late.

The lack of posting recently is because there’s been so much cool shit going on. I feel like Michael Cera’s character Evan in Superbad. Through all this welcome craziness, I haven’t had much time to write, but now I’m BACK! I didn’t want to make my little comeback without a new look, so take it all in! Breathe in all the noxious fumes! Ahh yes, “Reboot, Rebound…” not only signifies a new look here at The Sexy Armpit but it’s actually a line from The Dirty Pearls newest single “Who’s Coming Back to Who?” available now on iTunes and Amazon via the link below.

If you’re here reading this post and you still haven’t listened to at least ONE Dirty Pearls track then I’ll give you 30 – 60 seconds to create a new tab in your browser and go listen now. Come right back of course!

You’re still here? That means you’re either already aware of the New York City’s reigning kings of rock and roll, or you are just being an obstinate prick. You won’t regret discovering music from The Dirty Pearls, and you better get used to them because you’ll be hearing a lot more from them in the future and SEEING them too. The Dirty Pearls just wrapped up filming their first official music video for “Who’s Coming Back to Who?” and The Sexy Armpit was on location in NYC to capture behind the scenes footage for the making of the video. You’ll see that very soon, but until then I highly recommend you download the track because it’s so addictive that you’ll want to listen to it a bunch of times in a row.

I can’t reveal many details about the actual video yet, but I can say that the performance aspect has an old school rock and roll feel. Bands like The Beatles The Stones, KISS, AC/DC, and mostly all the great rockers have band members with their own distinct personality and look. The Dirty Pearls are bringing that idea to a new generation and their music and image will appeal to fans young and old.

At the helm directing the video was Jasin Cadic, lead singer of Star Killer and co-writer of the upcoming film The Perfect Age of Rock and Roll. I am hereby crediting Jasin and The Dirty Pearls for resuscitating the long forgotten art of the music video. After you see this video you will recall the days of being fascinated by MTV for hours and hours and all they played was videos. Judging from what I saw on the set, “Who’s Coming Back to Who?” restores hope for a full force comeback of stylish and bombastic music videos. Stay tuned!

*Remember, you still have time to enter The Green Hornet Toy Giveaway which ends this week. More info here.


STAR KILLER Strikes With Intense New EP


All of a sudden I had an ominous feeling overcome me while listening to Star Killer‘s debut EP. Much like in the TV series V or the film Independence Day, there’s a foreboding sense that these New York rockers are warning us that their approach is imminent. Of course there’s not actually a UFO looming over my town, but listening to Star Killer’s music feels just as monumental.

Packing a futuristic tone in freight, Star Killer’s sound soars into the outer rim. Star Killer’s approach to rock and metal creatively infuses aspects of Nine Inch Nails, Marilyn Manson, Korn, P.O.D, and industrial bands like KMFDM. Allow me to go more in-depth with each song, meanwhile, download your very own EP for your iPod here for free.

“As The Sky is Falling” is the powerful, mind probing opener. The song rises with a blaring scream followed by driving guitars mixed with ethereal sounds. The beautifully layered vocals and background vocals recall Depeche Mode. There’s a cinematic quality to Star Killers’ tracks and it’s no coincedence that lead singer and Edison NJ-born, Jasin Cadic, also co-wrote the screenplay to the film The Perfect Age of Rock n Roll. So, if Mad Max 4 is looking for a soundtrack, Star Killer is the band for the job.

Similarly, the chugging bass and guitars evoke revenge and desperation on “Out of Range.” The track features a mesmerizing chorus that is like an amped up, modern day “Another Brick in the Wall” by Pink Floyd. My favorite track, “Too Wrong,” is soaked in an up tempo alien plasma surrounded by industrial sounds, grinding guitars, earth shattering drums, and a danceable beat. The guitars are like a runaway locomotive in the tanked up mosher “Picture Perfect.” With it’s tremendous bassline and Cadic’s venomous vocals, this track is highly combustible.

For the last track I found myself marching around my room to the intro of “The Hunt.” If you weren’t planning on trying to kill a T-1000, you will be after you hear this song. It’s pulsating beat will have you running toward the nearest inter dimensional portal. Stick around for the whispering conclusion, it’s really creepy.

The explosive element of the songs on the Star Killer EP might very well be the product of caffeine. We had the chance to speak with Cadic and he stressed to us the importance of coffee in the studio while recording: “…some nights the coffee intake was definitely on the unhealthy side,” he joked.

We also asked Cadic what he was listening to on his iPod during their time in the studio and he was more than happy to oblige. If you’re curious to know how Star Killer managed to slide in some infectious beats in the songs, they may have been under the influence of Kanye’s 808’s and Heartbreak. Cadic balanced it out by citing Black Light Burns’ Cruel Melody, and one of his favorites of all time, Killing Joke’s 2003 self titled album with Dave Grohl on drums.

Star Killer is very much a collaborative effort between it’s 4 members, all of whom are close friends and have previously worked together. They recorded this adamantium assembly of tracks at their own studio as well as Jupiter 4 Studios in Rockaway, New York. All songs were written, produced, and mixed by Star Killer, with engineer Steve Schalk. Much like how KISS created the band they dreamed of seeing, Cadic is proud of Star Killer and considers them the band he would “…be at every show for and buy every album they release.”


Download their FREE EP and stay tuned to their official site http://www.starkillerband.com/
Follow them on Facebook http://www.facebook.com/starkillernyc
Reverb Nation Profile: http://www.reverbnation.com/starkillernyc

The Perfect Age of Rock ‘n’ Roll at The Woodstock Film Festival!


You’ve probably read my review or tweets gloating about how great a film The Perfect Age of Rock ‘n’ Roll is, if not, read this. If you’re near Woodstock, New York this weekend, you must check it out and see for yourself at The Woodstock Film Festival. Perfect Age is an inventive take on a classic theme. It’s a rock and roll road movie filled with kickass music and appearances by a few blues legends.

The Perfect Age of Rock ‘n’ Roll will be showing on October 2nd and 3rd. The film stars Jason Ritter, Taryn Manning, Kevin Zegers, Peter Fonda, and Marty E. of the New York City rock band The Dirty Pearls!

On October 3rd, to coincide with the east coast premiere of the film at the Woodstock Film Festival, you’ll be able to witness these legends LIVE in a special performance. Coming together on stage will be blues legends Hubert Sumlin, Pinetop Perkins, Sugar Blue, and Bob Stroger.

Click here for more info on the festival and to purchase tickets.

Click here to check out the official website of the film which streams original rock tracks from the soundtrack: http://theperfectageofrocknroll.com

The Perfect Age of Rock and Roll Review

“Nobody Leaves This Place Without Singing The Blues.”

– Albert Collins, Adventures in Babysitting
This isn’ the f–king Partridge Family. That’s what crossed my mind as the screen was ignited by The Perfect Age of Rock and Roll, the next classic rock and roll road film and winner of Outstanding Achievement in Filmmaking at the 2009 Newport Beach Film Festival. I was honored to have been present at a private screening of the film where I sat with the director and writer Scott Rosenbaum, producer Joseph White, and cast members including blues legends Hubert Sumlin and Sugar Blue. Their presence made the night unforgettable as the film affirms that rock and roll is merely the bastard child of the blues.

It’s the early ’90s and Spyder is the lead singer of The Lost Soulz, a mega famous rock band. Their first album was made up of songs Spyder stole from his best friend Eric who he left in the dust and moved out to L.A in search of fame. Without his songs, the second Soulz album tanked. The bands 15 minutes has almost ran out, but they have one last chance to redeem themselves. Oh, but there’s one thing, Lando Calrissian is their record producer! “How you doing, you old pirate? This contract is getting worse all the time!” OK, so, Billy Dee’s not actually Lando, he’s Ace Millstone and he’s not messing around. He wants the third Soulz record completed on time or they’ll be dropped from the label and vanish into obscurity. They can sure as hell forget being inducted to the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame, although they probably wouldn’t be eligible anyway since they stole all their hits songs. Sucks for them, that’s some predicament.
Forcing legs into leather pants can usually be quite a challenge, but Kevin Zegers (Dawn of the Dead, TransAmerica) slips into Spyder’s pair with remarkable ease. In a moment of desperation, Spyder, a Gerard Way looking dude with more mental issues than Brian Wilson watching Donnie Darko, sucks up his pride and flies back home to Long Island to visit his eternal best friend and former band mate, Eric. Son of a legendary deceased rocker, Eric is a shabby music teacher played by Jason Ritter (Freddy vs. Jason, W.). Spyder proposes that Eric join the band as their guitarist and they put the misty mountain of songs that he’s written to good use. After the hard sell, Eric reluctantly accepts under one condition, they drive cross country back to L.A while getting their kicks on the legendary Route 66.
Since Eric’s dream of touring the country and experiencing the rock and roll lifestyle was ripped away from him, he’s making this chance count. We’re invited along for the ride in a tin lizzie of a tour bus, which is one step above the Wagon Queen Family Truckster. As the Soulz pass through the states rolling down the highway, they encounter sex, drugs, booze, and even a lesson in the blues from Sugar Blue and Hubert Sumlin.

If you’re planning on taking the whole band cross country, Peter Fonda is YOUR bus driver! In an amalgamation of many of his classic roles, Fonda’s Auggie West acts as a mentor to The Lost Soulz. Auggie’s been down this road before and attempts to steer Eric and Spyder clear of drugs and band breakups. Fonda’s comedic ability is impressive as a timeworn hippie stoner attempting to nurture a new generation of counterculture. While navigating Route 66, Auggie frequently displayed his world of musical knowledge by challenging the band and their manager Rose (Taryn Manning), to “name that tune.” It was goofy fun, but also his inherit shot at enriching the band’s musical prowess.
To illustrate the erratic Axl/Slash relationship between Spyder and Eric, Rosenbaum intertwines classic rock songs with striking visuals. The Lost Soulz tracks were created for the film by members of The New York Dolls and composer Andrew Hollander. Zegers and Ritter actually sing on these tracks. In addition to classic rock songs, you’ll hear old blues classics that have later been covered by modern bands. The filmmakers captured several intense scenes depicting the temptation, allure, and consequences of the rock and roll lifestyle which are accentuated through vivid camerawork, sharp editing, and the carefully chosen soundtrack. Rock films often succumb to looking awash in colored filters, fuzzy effects, and nausea inducing jump cuts, but thankfully, this is not one of them.
The musically adept cast bring the scenes to life like they’re strumming a Strat. Taryn Manning (Crossroads, 8 Mile) is the Soulz manager Rose, and Lukas Haas (Lady in White, Mars Attacks) stars as Clifton, a writer for Revolver magazine. Manning is in a band called Boomkat and has starred in Butch Walker’s “The Weight of Her” video, while Haas has appeared in music videos by My Chem and Death Cab, and also plays drums in a band called The Rogues. The onscreen rhythm section of The Lost Soulz consists of bassist Bixx played by Jasin Cadic, co-writer of the screenplay, Edison NJ native, and musician in the band Handful of Dust. Drummer Bonzo, is actually Marty E. of The Dirty Pearls, the reigning kings of NYC’s rock scene. Director Scott Rosenbaum, also a drummer, told me about Marty’s key role in the film, “There is nothing worse than a movie performance of a band where the actors can’t hold their instruments and the drummer looks like he’s mixing a cake. It’s obvious and it sucks. Marty kicked ass.”
Being a New Jersey aficionado, I was thrilled to discover that many scenes in P.A.R.R were filmed here. The production company set up their H.Q in Rahway and used several locations around the state including Burlington County, Marlboro, Montclair, Newark, Westfield, and Cadic’s Grandmother’s house in Edison. “Montgomery Township was awesome to us! The mayor even came down to the set!” said Producer Joseph White. The Starland Ballroom in Sayreville and The Colorado Cafe in Watchung also served as backdrops for Soulz concert scenes.
P.A.R.R is the inspiration of its writer and director Scott Rosenbaum. He’s crafted an intrepid film that, as of press time, is seeking a distributor. Producer Joseph White indicated that the distributor “should care as much about rock and roll and the blues as we do.” It’s clear that the filmmakers are music buffs thanks to various references strategically planted in the film like hidden Mickeys at Disney World. Even the title of the film alludes to the “27 club,” a list of musicians who died at 27. The closing credits feature vintage clips of some of its members like Morrison, Joplin, and Cobain.
The film left me with the impression that our video game culture controlled by plastic wireless instruments is in dire need to be versed in the feelings that incited musicians to create Rock and Roll in the first place. If you’ve ever stood in front of a Marshall stack and “let the sound take you away” or “played until your fingers bled,” then this movie was made for you.
Music from Nirvana, Bob Dylan, Alice in Chains, Jane’s Addiction, Iggy & The Stooges, and more. For more, visit: www.ThePerfectAgeofRockNRoll.com
Jay Amabile, www.TheSexyArmpit.com