Halloween House Display in Woodbridge, NJ

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On the ride home last night I swear I noticed Dracula on someones lawn. The Frog Brother in me told me that I needed to pull over and check it out. I wouldn’t want any blood sucking house invasions taking place in a nice town like this! When we pulled up to the house I let out a sigh of relief because the vampire wasn’t real, it was all part of a killer Halloween display that the good folks of the house have been putting up every year for the last 9 years!

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The display, which takes up their entire lawn, steps, and porch, includes Frankenstein, skeltons escaping from the ground, and glowing window characters. The setup was well done and exceptionally scary! One of the best things about Halloween and Christmas is that you never know what kinds of unbelievable decorations you’ll see when driving around. So many people put forth much effort into their lawn displays and they need to be appreciated!

Dunkin’ Donuts in NJ Goes All Out for Halloween!

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Dunkin’ Donuts: get your medium coffee and the shit scared out of you! Many of the Dunkin’ Donuts locations in New Jersey decorate for Halloween, but a relatively small D&D in Perth Amboy, NJ went beyond hanging a few cobwebs and the face of a cardboard witch, they transformed into a virtual haunted house! It’s awesome when the Halloween spirit even spreads to store owners. Enjoy some of the pictures I was able to snap!

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these dudes clearly didn’t get their coffee this morning

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the snake slithering down from the vent was really creepy!

Trick or YouTube Treat?

The Sexy Armpit wishes all of you a Happy Halloween, and to celebrate here’s some NJ related videos from YouTube that will scare up the spirits:

First up, YouTube user Carriedark has recreated Wildwood’s Castle Dracula in 3-D.

YouTube user clarkkent1367 posted a news clip reporting when Castle Dracula burned down.

Mike Spade’s legendary Halloween display:

Here’s one that I first saw at our friend The Retroist‘s site, A Halloween Safety video from 1977! The adviser was the Toms River, NJ Chief of Police! Posted by YouTube user vancefink.

New Jersey’s Great Pop Culture Moments Vol.26: Jersey Devil Video Game

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This is the animated intro to the Jersey Devil video game on the original Playstation console. I remember seeing the game in clearance bins at Kaybee several times, but it never looked intriguing enough to actually buy it. Thanks to YouTube user S4muel666 for offering the video!

This time around, The Jersey Devil is the hero for a change. His enemy is a mad scientist who chemically alters veggies and sounds like Scrooge McDuck. The scientist has a minion, Dennis, who is a doting pumpkinhead. Eventually there’s mutated vegetables running rampant throughout the fictional Jersey Town and The Jersey Devil is the only hope. Although, the amount of ass The Jersey Devil can kick in that purple outfit is questionable.

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Monica Keena is October’s Garden State Playmate!

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I first saw Monica Keena on Dawson’s Creek. Ah crap, I guess that means that I actually watched that show. Yup, I did, but only the first few seasons, I swear! A few years later she also starred in one of my favorite shows ever, Judd Apatow’s Undeclared. Undeclared was another show that suffered from low ratings, but I was a staunch believer and was sad to see it go. Luckily, Keena didn’t disappear with the cancellation of Undeclared. The girl who would soon be known for chopping Freddy Krueger’s head off was born in New Jersey and raised in Brooklyn, NY.
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Keena also has another Jersey connection. She provided the voice of Trishelle in The Sopranos: Road to Respect video game. The game was released for PS2 in 2006. Several people have told me that the game sucked, but I’ve yet to play it. I’ve also yet to play with Keenas boobs but that’s a whole other post. I can see it now “The Sexy Armpit: Road to Monica Keena’s Boobies.”
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For a while, before she apparently had a botched plastic surgery, I thought Keena was stunning in every film or TV show I saw her in. Dammit! I even sat through the abysmal Man of the House because of her! On the other hand, Fifty Pills is still an underrated film. I also can’t forget her hot little stint on Entourage either. Unless she has some sort of miraculous resurgence, or Tarantino tweezes her ass out of Hollywood limbo, it seems like Monica Keena’s most memorable role will always be as Lori Campbell in 2003’s Freddy vs. Jason. Next up, Keena will star in the remake of Night of the Demons along with Shannon Elizabeth, Eddie Furlong, and Diora Baird.

This is one of many Keena quotes printed on her IMDB page:

“I’ve only seen two horror movies in my life, and one of them was Nightmare on Elm Street, when I was about eight years old. And it scared me so much that I couldn’t sleep for two or three months. So I always swore I would never do a horror movie. It was very cathartic to be working with Freddy and to realize he’s not a real person. Robert Englund is a really sweet guy under all the make-up.”

NJ T-Shirt Tuesday 24: The Fiend Club

On Tuesday October 27th, 2009, The Misfits will premiere their new single “Land of the Dead” exclusively on Sirius-XM radio. In addition to the satellite radio premiere, The Misfits will perform 2 new tracks live at The Starland Ballroom in Sayreville, NJ on mischief night October 30th! Tracks from the new album, Land of the Dead, are available through iTunes, Amazon, Misfits.com, etc. The Land of the Dead T-Shirt is available at the Fiend Store. The albums cover art (and the art on this t-shirt) was drawn by Arthur Suydam (Marvel Zombies).

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The legion of KISS fans are known as THE KISS ARMY, while fans of The Misfits are The Fiend Club. This weeks 2nd offering for NJ T-Shirt Tuesday is the official Fiend Club T-Shirt available at 80stees.com.

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All month long I’ve been playing the Misfits on my iPod in honor of Halloween. The Misfits have never been embarrassed to admit that they are from New Jersey, and that’s awesome.

TMNT’s Jersey Devil

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Naturally the JERSEY DEVIL would be found
in the back of a DINER, another thing Jersey is famous for!
Nickelodeon’s recent purchase of the rights to the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles has excited me quite a bit. I’m hoping to see the Turtles return to their fun, pizza eating ways again. The heroes in a half shell provided the best entertainment when they were all about “duuude” and “cowabunga.” I understand that the Turtles were originally conceived to be darker and edgier, but I was introduced to them in cartoon form in 1987. I’ll take Shredder, Krang, and Bebop and Rocksteady any day. F-ck it, give me Venus De Milo too. I’m cheesy, I know.

Even though I’m a sucker for animation and rubber costumes, 2007’s TMNT offered three things that the other Turtles films didn’t. One of my favorite actresses, Sarah Michelle Gellar, as April O’Neil, as well as cameos by Kevin Smith and the Jersey Devil! My only complaint is that Corey Feldman didn’t voice Donatello!
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When Raphael goes out on the town as the Nightwatcher, he winds up in a pier 6 brawl with the Jersey Devil in the back of a diner. The Jersey Devil happens to be one of the 13 monsters unleashed by Max Winters in the film. As they wrestle around the kitchen, Big City Rock’s version of “Black Betty” blares in the background.

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Leave it to a pint sized, excitable creature from New Jersey to start a fight with a mutant turtle that’s 3 times his size. During the scuffle, Raph referred to JD as a “hermit crab,” which is an accurate description of this interpretation of the legendary monster from the Pine Barrens. Although it is likely the tiny creature you see in this film is intended to be the same Jersey Devil who hangs out in the woods of southern New Jersey, there is no official reference to it in the movie.

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Before TMNT was released, I thought it was destined to be one of my future favorites. After seeing it in the theater on opening night, I left wishing it was less serious and more like the ’80s cartoon series. It seemed like a huge win for fans of the original comic book with its grittier action and dose of drama. The film looks visually outstanding but lacks the ‘toonish charm of the ’80s TV series. Back when the cartoon first aired, I was embarrassed to admit that I liked it since I felt that I was not only passed the appropriate age for being a Turtles fan, but also that I was a staunch Bat-fan. Teenaged turtles who knew martial arts, skateboarded, and ate pizza seemed like a lampoon in comparison to a dark, serious, brooding detective. Regardless, I watched the show every day, especially in the mornings when I ate my cereal.
The recent animated TV incarnation of the Turtles left me unfulfilled. Instead, the ’80s cartoon style of the Turtles appealed to me more. Aside from its excellent aspects, the 2007 TMNT film did a fantastic job of capturing a nice mix of the various character styles, but in film form I still prefer the live action Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles films.
*Check out Thomas Perkins blog, the man who originally designed the character of the Jersey Devil for the TMNT film!

Haunted House “Illustration”

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Illustration is in quotes because I don’t think this poorly drawn picture that I made when I was 9 years old deserves that description. Drawing was never one of my strong points, but what this haunted house lacks in technical accuracy it excels in spirit. My passion for horror began at a young age and when October rolled around, there were many assignments in school that involved Halloween and all things spooky. This haunted house was the result of an assignment my teacher gave us: Draw a haunted house and then write a story describing the house using similies.
I ate assigments like this up. I remember that I couldn’t wait to get down to business. I also figured that I had an “A” in the bag since I was one of the few kids in my class obsessed with watching horror movies, not to mention that I was one of the only ones who had parents that allowed me to. (Thanks Mom and Dad!)
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I jam packed every creature that might be associated with a haunted house. This drawing included ghosts, spiders, candles, 8-bit mini Frankensteins, bats, talking pumpkins, Jason and Freddy, and of course…that other thing you have NO IDEA about. The thing standing to the left of Jason is actually supposed to be Chucky from Child’s Play. The other conundrum is standing outside the house perched on top of a coffin. Yes folks, that’s supposed to be a werewolf who, poor thing, has no arms. I’m not positive, but I’m pretty sure I left Dracula out because he was still chilling in his coffin. Since the moon is clearly visible on the top left, it’s high time he got his blood sucking ass outta there.

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New Jersey’s Great Pop Culture Moments Vol. 25: Q The Winged Commuter

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The 1982 thriller, Q the Winged Serpent, is among the best blogger fodder of all time. David Carradine, Richard Roundtree, and Michael Moriarty star in this epic feature about a giant flying lizard who’s just trying to get his eat on around New York City. With a plot like that it’s just too easy to make fun of.

If you can look passed the awful special effects, there is a truly amusing scene in the beginning of the film. An unassuming woman is clearly trying to relax on a lawn chair and catch some rays on the roof of her apartment building. Just like any typical NYC sun worshipper, she is lathering suntan lotion onto her bare breasts when she suddenly gets ripped from her chair and hoisted away into the sky by the frigging buzzkiller Q. It sucks because I was really getting into that scene too. The actress, Bobbi Burns, was emoting big time. I don’t think I’ve witnessed such a dramatic application of suntan lotion on breasts ever. She showed such a beautifully subtle and gentle massage technique. Wonderful.

So, let’s see, the effects are terrible, the plot is pretty lame, and the acting is mediocre at best, so what is Q’s redeeming quality? I’ll tell you:

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As detectives assigned to what is assumed to be a case of ritual killings, Shepard (Carradine) and Powell (Roundtree), treat this monstrous winged creature like an average New York City criminal. It’s when they meet with Captain Fletcher that the buffoonery begins. Fletcher offers his opinion on how Q gets to Manhattan:
“You know it can take us weeks to find where this thing’s holed up. I mean, it could be in the woods, away from the city someplace, it could be over in Jersey someplace. My God, with a wing span like you’re talking about here that thing could fly miles into New York City every day, and it would do that of course you know because New York is famous for good eating.”
Yeah that’s it Fletcher. Q likes to eat at all the gourmet restaurants in midtown. That’s one thing about Q, he always likes to use silverware and napkins.
SERGIO: “Oh well, isn’t this a surprise! Good Afternoon Q! I’m Sergio and I’ll be your waiter today. Do you see anything on the menu that you like?”
Q THE WINGED SERPENT: “Umm, yes as a matter of fact, I’ll take one shirtless human female, basted in suntan lotion.”
SERGIO: “Mmm, that’s one of my personal favorites. I’ll bring her out right away!”