Hulk Hogan’s Birthday and Meeting The WWE Hall of Famer at iPlay America

Super Posedown: The Sexy Armpit and The Hulkster 
at iPlay Americain Freehold, NJ

CM Punk once said: “…I have zero faith in Hulk Hogan as a man who’s what…60 years old and tries to dress like he’s 18 and he lives on the Jersey Shore…” While I can’t agree on the faith in the Hulkster part, I sort of agree that Hulk has been looking a little bit Jersey as of late. Or maybe some of us here in NJ have tried to look like him? The horde of Hulkamaniacs on line for Hulk Hogan Uncut at iPlay America in Freehold on August 2nd, 2014 were all donning their red and yellow while some wore black and white N.W.O t-shirts. Since today is the Hulkster’s birthday and there will be a bash for him on WWE Monday Night Raw tonight, let’s look back at the Hulk Hogan Uncut event I attended at iPlay last weekend.

Hulk was usually billed from Venice Beach, and later, Hollywood. California may have some beautiful weather and states like Hawaii and Colorado may have the happiest people in the country, but New Jersey has definitely got to be king of the quirk. If you believe what you see on TV, you probably think all we’re good for is fist pumping guidos at Jersey Shore clubs, but I’m here to tell you, it isn’t all like that. Where else can you run into perhaps the greatest professional wrestling icons of all time, go to a KISS and Def Leppard concert, and stroll around a Punk Rock Flea Market all in one weekend? Last weekend was surely a jam packed pop-culture filled experience and it all kicked off in huge way: a meet and greet with the immortal Hulk Hogan!

To me, nothing beats a weekend where I have absolutely nothing planned. It’s not that it makes me feel like the weekend is full of possibilities, it’s more that I know I can settle in for a couple of days of doing absolutely nothing and kicking ass at it. Many of us claim to be the best lazy f*ckers around, but daddy says I’m the best at it. That was my Vacation tribute.

Winning the championship of couch laying was not in the cards for me. I actually had stuff to do. I felt like it may have been too much, but it was fun stuff, so how I could I complain? It’s one thing if I had to go to some banquet hall and get dressed up for a family function, but it’s quite another that I was slated to go to a nearby cavernous indoor arcade to meet my childhood wrestling hero.

We made our way down Route 9 toward iPlay America in Freehold for Uncut with Hulk Hogan. The event included a Q&A session followed by a meet and greet for fans. I’d passed on two meet and greets with the Hulkster in previous years, but I felt like this was the one that I couldn’t miss. I already had tickets to see KISS later that night with Miss Sexy Armpit, so why not complicate the day even more and tack on another thing for us to do? Fortunately it was on the way down to Atlantic City and the timing worked out perfectly, so it was meant to be.

Accompanied by Jimmy “Mouth of the South” Hart, The Hulkster answered questions submitted by the fans and offered insight into some of his biggest career milestones. If you’re a fan and have seen WWE’s Hulk Hogan DVD collections, you’ve seen and heard much of the content here, but they did leak the fact that Hogan would appear on Raw in two weeks, which is tonight. That little spoiler was definitely an exclusive for us before it was officially announced by WWE.

The Hulkster was genuinely happy to meet with everyone. He flexed and smiled for photos with each fan and when it came time for The Sexy Armpit, I didn’t pull any punches, brother. First he said “Sweet shirt, brother!” in regards to my Thunderlips t-shirt from Barber Shop Window which is a parody of the classic Hulkamania t-shirt, but with the name of his Rocky III character in the same font. I blasted a “Thanks Hulk!” in reply, then I immediately asked him if we could do one of his iconic poses, one of my favorites from his ring celebrations at the conclusion of his matches. If Hulk said no, my second option would’ve been the Rip’Em hand gesture from No Holds Barred. Surprisingly I didn’t see anyone do that, where’s the love for NHB people?

I’m glad we took part in this event because Hulk was very cool. Often, meeting celebrities turns out to be a big letdown. After my very brief exchange with Hulk, I raked his back and then hightailed my ass out of there. I’m kidding of course, I raked his eyes.

This awesome experience all went down at iPlay America, which is a fantastic place for kids as well as adults. It’s basically an indoor amusement park with an arcade and an upscale Atlantic City casino atmosphere. If you’re in the ti-state area, it’s well worth it to pack the kids into the car and make the trip to Freehold, NJ.

I don’t even think the staff of iPlay had any idea of the onslaught of people that showed up to Hulk Hogan Uncut. I’ve read a few articles about this event floating around that basically referred to this as having “a nice little turnout.” That is a total understatement. I don’t have an accurate head count but a shit ton of people showed up to see Hulk and I’m almost positive that it was completely sold out. It’s not surprising either, considering all the exposure Hulk has been getting since returning to WWE TV this year.

In this case “…and today is his birthday” doesn’t refer to Jason Voorhees, but the Hulkster. Yes, today IS his birthday and Jimmy Hart’s spoiler that Hogan would be on Raw tonight was accurate, but what they didn’t mention is that there are rumors swirling of a possible N.W.O reunion tonight. Tune in tonight, brothers!
110 Schanck Rd.
Freehold, NJ 07728

The Immortal Hulk Hogan Comes to Freehold, NJ!

Hulk Hogan UNCUT is a special event coming to iPlay America in Freehold on Saturday, August 2nd, 2014.

New Jersey has had it’s share of Hulk Hogan moments, but this one will give fans a rare opportunity to be a part of a Q&A with the Hulkster as well as a meet and greet. I would’ve found out about this one too late if it weren’t for my sister shooting me a text about it. So, thanks to the Sexy Armpit’s sister, BROTHER! See what I did there?

For a guy who grew up a little Hulkamaniac, I’m pretty pumped to be a part of this intimate event with one of the greatest and most charismatic professional wrestlers of all time, WWE Hall of Famer, Hulk Hogan.

I checked iPlay America out back in the fall with Dinosaur Dracula and although we only had the chance to play a few games, this place is like an Atlantic City casino, minus the actual gambling and cigarette smoke. There’s video games, rides, food and live events all within such a cool atmosphere. In the few years it’s been open, iPlay has quickly become a destination for concerts, comedy, UFC events, and other celebrity appearances.

General admission tickets for HH Uncut as well as two different tiers of VIP tickets are available now at the following link:

Go here for the iPlay America Hulk Hogan UNCUT event page

iPlay America Event Center
110 Schanck Road
Freehold, NJ

Brooke Hogan’s 21st Birthday in New Jersey


Is Atlantic City hurting that bad? They’ve stooped to dropping the atomic leg drop on Brooke Hogan in order to convince her to celebrate her 21st birthday at Harrah’s Resort. How many people dropping nickels into machines in Atlantic City are interested in VH1’s Brooke Knows Best? How many of their kids are even interested in that show? VH1 is a station that prides themselves on Bret Michaels being their golden boy. Are young girls watching Daisy of Love and Charm School with their 40-something moms? I hope not or this country has gone down the tubes completely.

I don’t think I’m out of line in saying that Brooke Hogan is NOT a draw in any way. Now, Paris Hilton on the other hand, despite her bevy of haters, IS a traditional draw in Atlantic City. Hmm, let’s weigh in: Brooke is the uninteresting daughter of the O.J Simpson co-conspirator Hulk Hogan and Paris Hilton is best known for being a media whore and a lame sex tape actress. Just based on the sex tape alone I’d have to go with hosting Paris’ bday instead. Somehow I think Brooke would be more successful if she just broke down and decided to become a WWE Diva. It’s her destiny. Or she could just make a lame sex tape.

Let’s hope Brooke’s brother Nick isn’t driving her to Harrah’s from the airport or else everyone on the Garden State Parkway is in big trouble. Oh and BTW, please keep her whack job mother Linda faaarrrr away from NJ.

May 9th at Harrah’s Casino & Resort
With a bargain basement admission price of a mere $25 bucks!!!

College Humor’s “Colonial New Jersey” Sketch

I could pretty much guess the questions that are popping into your mind as you’re watching this. I’ll take the liberty of preemptively tackling them for you:
1) Since I’m from Jersey, do I walk around with a fake tan? Nope.
2) Is my hair done in a “blowout” ?? Definitely not.
3) Do I speak as ridiculous as “deez guyz?” That’s a negative Ghostrider.
4) What are the names of your left and right bicepts? They remain unnamed. Even though I don’t kiss them or make out with them like the guy in this video, I do admire them every now and then when I’m practicing my Hulk Hogan poses in the mirror.
**Notice the folks at College Humor referred to Jersey as one of the “Armpit Colonies.” 

Classic WWF/WWE Event Cards from New Jersey #1

Welcome to ringside folks! It’s a slobberknocker here at The Sexy Armpit where we’re taking a look at the FIRST in a series of Classic WWF/WWE Event cards. An event card is the rundown of all the matches that take place at a house show, Live TV taping, or a Pay Per View. These cards are from events that I actually attended, and as we get into later posts in this series you’ll notice the quality of the cards diminish greatly. Nowadays you don’t see these match listings as much, since so many storylines change at the last minute, and occasionally a wrestler slated to appear gets replaced due to injury. But for now, let’s enjoy the classic days of the WWF as we take you down to Gorilla Monsoon and Jesse “The Body” Ventura!

It’s Monday June 8th, 1987 and the WWF Superstars have come to the arena formerly known as The Brendan Byrne, what is now known as The Izod Center. In possibly the shittiest main event in WWF history, former referee “Dangerous” Danny Davis took on George “The Animal” Steele as their feud continued. Could you imagine if it went the full hour time limit? George would have devoured all 4 turnbuckles by that time! Looking back, I have difficulty categorizing this as even a mid-card bout. It didn’t bother me because the excitement of being able to go to a live WWF event was overwhelming. When I was a kid I’d be happy watching two jobbers wrestle in the main event just as long as I was at an actual WWF show. I don’t think I realized I was getting ripped off, but I was still upset that I wasn’t able to see some of my favorites like Hulk Hogan and Randy Savage. Not all the matches were specifically detailed but there was sure to be “other all star bouts” happening that night. It’s possible even they didn’t know what else was going to happen. “Who’s around? Do we have Hacksaw Jim Duggan? Throw him out there against Barry Horowitz STAT!”

They Live Starring John Cena? has an exclusive interview with WWE’s John Cena regarding the possibility of him starring in a remake of 1988’s They Live. Will he step into Rowdy Roddy Piper’s role for the modern day take on the film?

I’m glad to read that io9 is referring to Cena positively. All you Cena haters aren’t being forced to watch RAW last I checked. Go watch TNA, UFC, or Hulkster’s Celebrity Wrestling!

Birthday Cakes and Batman

Birthday cakes have always been a bit of a sore subject for me. Every year since I could remember I wanted Cookie Puss for my birthday. It took about 8 years or so but I finally got him and he was the most enjoyable puss I ever had. For some reason, I never got big birthday shindigs or elaborate specialty birthday cakes. I guess it wasn’t in the cards for me. Dionne Warwick told me that when I called her up as a kid. She said almost exactly that: “Jay you’ll never have a great big party or a personalized character cake for your birthday.” I used to ask my mother why I didn’t (“How come ma?”) and it seemed there was no reason. “How come ma?”

Birthdays, especially in March, (like mine) seem to just creep up on people and then disappear like they never happened. In like a lion, out like a lamb as they say. Even though that doesn’t really pertain to this scenario, it sounded good. So I never really had a kickass cake until cookie Puss and that only happened once. About a year later my mother pulled a few slick moves and got Batman put on my cake. My father and I have birthdays that fall within 2 days of each other so both of our names were on the cake. I didn’t mind that at all since I was reasonable. I’ll share the sugary icing of a spotlight with my dad as long as Bats is on my cake. That definitely surprised me because it showed that someone was finally listening! A small part of me really wanted some little Batman and Robin figurines running on the icing backdrop of Gotham City, bat-signal and all, but I would take what I could get at that point! More than 10 years later, my girlfriend at the time created an amazing Batman cake for my 20th birthday. Cutting it up and eating it was the hardest part. Who would want to cut up Batman? Besides, The Joker!

I think birthdays in general should be fun and different than any other day. If your own birthday isn’t somewhat different from the norm that would suck. I’m not the type to ask for people to make a fuss over me but it’s sure nice when they do it on their own! I know if I was a kid right now, I’d be begging to have Batman parties, Pirates of the Caribbean parties, Hulk parties etc. When I was a kid I had everything from Super Friends plates (pictured) to WWF napkins but ne’er a Hulkster cake.
I think Birthday cakes should be personalized, although I understand the painstaking work that goes into them. A couple of years ago I took a crack at it and made my girl a Marvin the Martian birthday cake. For a guy who’s the opposite of Julia Childs I think I did a pretty damn good job. For a look at another cool cake related post check out Geektarded who has a really cool look at a MOTU birthday he had when he was a kid. How many bat-cakes have you guys had? Did you have any other cool cakes we should know about?