Jim Norton and Rich Vos Induct Abbott and Costello Into NJ HOF

Posted on by sexyarmpit
[youtube http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9KZZTeXQzX0?rel=0]

Today is National Tell a Joke Day. What’s weirder, the fact that our nation has actually dedicated a specific day to telling a joke or the fact that I actually know what day it falls on? Either way I thought the best way to celebrate this momentous occasion is to spotlight a couple of NJ’s best comedians. I can’t fully endorse the NJ Hall of Fame until they induct The Sexy Armpit for being the greatest New Jersey Pop Culture website of all time. Even if that never happens I can still enjoy this induction of the legendary comedy duo from Jersey, Abbott and Costello. Check out two of Jersey’s funniest comedians, Jim Norton and Rich Vos honoring their predecessors.

www.SexyArmpit.com

NJ T-Shirt Tuesday 77: New and Improved Sexy Armpit T-Shirts!

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sexy armpit tshirt

People always ask me “Jay, when are you making more Sexy Armpit T-Shirts?” It’s not like T-Shirts grow on trees people! A lot of work goes into creating a decent looking t-shirt and I’m no graphic designer by any means. Luckily, with sites like Cafe Press, Zazzle, and Red Bubble, it’s possible for anyone to create their own tees. A few years back, I whipped up the first ever batch of Sexy Armpit t-shirts through Custom Ink. Although they were fairly reasonable, creating the t-shirt through them wasn’t the easiest process.

Custom Ink charged extra for how many different ink colors a shirt has. This is how they soak you. It also forces people into taking necessary colors out of their graphic, therefore creating a crappy low budget looking t-shirt. I had to compromise the integrity of my graphic because I couldn’t afford to print up shirts with the logo as is. Custom Ink’s customer service group was excellent and they offer discounts if you order in bulk as well as if you agree to have their website printed on the back of your t-shirt in an average size font. But because of all these issues I decided to go elsewhere this time around.

I figured it was about time to at least have t-shirts available if someone wanted one. As you all know, I’m a t-shirt fiend and always have been, so I would actually wear a t-shirt with my own blogs logo. I created this new t-shirt through Red Bubble and I can honestly say that this tee has improved in every way possible. The logo is bigger and clearer with more accurate colors and you can also choose from any different color you want. Besides a regular tee and a v-neck, there’s also the option of ordering a girl’s baby tee style, a long sleeve t-shirt, as well as a hoodie.

Several years back, I gave out the first round of Sexy Armpit t-shirts away for free, solely as promotional items. The problem with that is, custom t-shirts are really damn expensive! I can’t afford to buy a bunch of these shirts so I tried to keep the prices low by taking almost half of what the average markup is. This translates to me not making much back on each tee. I wish these shirts could be a lot more reasonable because then more people would be apt to buy one, but above all, it is indeed a cool looking t-shirt. Not only fans and friends of this blog will like wearing it, but also fans of The Garden State and all things Jersey.

www.SexyArmpit.com

The Man Cave Interviews The Sexy Armpit!

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[youtube http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZR0imy5OA-w?rel=0]

Geof and Dan the cameraman from one of the best blogs around, The Man-Cave, filmed an impromptu interview with none other than The Sexy Armpit at the Monster Mania Convention in Cherry Hill NJ on March 12th, 2011. I had a lot of fun and I felt like I was on a much lower budget Jimmy Kimmel Live or something. Geof has been on a rampage with podcasting and Youtube interviews, and there’s been daily updates over there so after you watch the interview, take a trip into The Man-Cave and check it all out! Thanks for the interview Geof! http://www.theman-cave.com/

www.SexyArmpit.com

New Jersey Day is TODAY!!!

Posted on by sexyarmpit
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Today is New Jersey Day. On this day 223 years ago, New Jersey officially became the 3rd state of the United States. A lot of people have been asking me, Jay, how does one celebrate New Jersey Day? Here’s a few things you can do…

1) Start your day off right, with a greasy sandwich: pork roll egg and cheese on a roll!

2) Fill up your gas tank! Breathe in the fumes and enjoy the fact that you don’t have to lift a finger to pump your gas.

3) Have for some good ‘ol fashioned road rage. Stick your middle finger up proudly. Throw your head out the car window and shout “F*ck You Motherf*cker!” Followed by a barrage of annoying HONKING. Be thankful for living in Jersey because we don’t get fined or ticketed for honking our horns like in New York City.

4) Get in front of a mirror and continue to practice your impression of Silvio Dante (Little Steven) from in The Sopranos.

5) Flick through the channels to see what’s on TV. Forget 57 channels and there’s nothing on…more like 857 channels and nothing on!

6) Marvel at the fact that Jon Bon Jovi has horned his way into the White House.

7) Go back into the Sexy Armpit archives and pick an old post that haven’t read. I will write you and I.O.U. Or, take a look at one of the many entries of NJ T-Shirt Tuesday and buy a tee to wear NEXT year on NJ Day!

8) Take a trip down to Atlantic City and gaze at tons and tons of people pissing their money away. Don’t believe the stories for a second that nobody is going to A.C. Where there’s a vice there’s people and New Jersey has an overabundance of both.

9) Go to the mall, our sales tax is a little bit cheaper, but our people are still a-holes. As you drive there you’ll have a lot of time to reflect on life because, chances are, on any one of our fabulous roads or highways you’ll probably be sitting in a ridiculous amount of traffic.  Once in the parking lot, you will get into a fight for a spot. Then, inside the mall, people will walk into you because they don’t pay attention. Don’t even mention those annoying kiosk people. No, I don’t want you to slather your exotic facial cream culled from the dead sea onto my face in the middle of the mall. Get out of my face!

10) Pretend you’re DJ Pauly D and crank up your iPod! We have plenty of offerings for today. From Old Blue Eyes to Bon Jovi, and The Four Seasons to The Fugees and Springsteen to The Smithereens there’s an endless array of artists who have spawned from The Garden State.

www.SexyArmpit.com

Welcome to The Sexy Armpit’s 2010 Halloween Countdown!

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The Sexy Armpit has a lot of awesome posts in store for the Halloween season and I’m looking forward to sharing them with you! I consider October to be the best time of year and it must be the supernatural atmosphere that possesses all of us bloggers to write spooky posts all month long. Make sure to follow all those cool blogs participating in The Countdown to Halloween, many of which are friends of The Sexy Armpit so pay them a visit! If you’d like to be a part of the crew, head over to the site and let them know!

Creating countdowns on a blog can become more hard work than fun. In the summer, Shark Month here at the Armpit became quite tedious, but Halloween is always a blast. In the spirit of making it even MORE fun, look at the top of this page and you’ll notice this year’s Halloween header. It’s The Sexy Armpit’s homage to the ’80s vampire classic, The Lost Boys! There’s really nothing “Jersey” about The Lost Boys other than the fact that I used to watch it incessantly as a kid growing up in NJ.

As you prepare yourself for the coming onslaught of the most ghoulish month of the year, remember to come back and visit The Sexy Armpit often throughout October to see all kinds of haunted, nostalgic, and Jersey related Halloween stuff. I’ll have posts about my costume this year, events I’ll be attending, crap I picked up at stores, and the typical Sexy Armpit content.

Also, please check out some of the BEST Halloween related posts from previous years here at The Sexy Armpit if you haven’t read them yet.

www.SexyArmpit.com

NJ T-Shirt Tuesday 34: The Situation from MTV’s Jersey Shore

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The Situation MTV Jersey Shore

Unfortunately, The Whereabouts just doesn’t have the same ring as The Situation. I’m absolutely furious that Mike “The Situation” Sorrentino has tarnished one of the best words in the English language forever. All the hipsters who actually enjoy watching MTV will now associate the word SITUATION with a former male stripper from Staten Island. In fact, this guy helped make Jersey Shore the pop culture phenomenon that it is, and the m-therfucker is from Staten Island?!?! He’s what true Jersey Shore folks call a Benny! Or as you may remember in a scene from Star Wars: A New Hope “We don’t serve their kind here!”

When I was but a young whippersnapper, the word SITUATION was well respected. It was an esteemed word that didn’t come to mind when sweaty, fist pumping, ‘roided out, guidos were mentioned. The real situation is the puddles going on in their armpits! (That is not Sexy). Can you remember a simpler time not so long ago? Take a moment to think back to a period of your life when the mere mention of the word situation elicited such cool and recognizable song lyrics such as “OK, here’s the SITUATION my parents went away on a weeks vacation…” I’m going to make a safe wager that Will Smith doesn’t even care that whenever I hear one of his legendary rhymes, a Staten Island guido will completely cloud my mind and impair me from enjoying the rest of DJ Jazzy Jeff and The Fresh Prince’s classic “Parents Just Don’t Understand.” Every time I hear the word situation, it feels like I’m having a little heart attack.

I used to chant along wild and passionate with Motley Crue’s frontman Vince Neil, and shout “It’s the saaame ol’, saaame ol’ SITUAAATION!” and now thank goodness I have a medical alert button around my neck or someone would literally have to kickstart my heart. This guy is frigging everywhere! I can’t think of a more appropriate time to say WTF? Have you ever been sitting around quietly reflecting on the events of the day and suddenly began to think to yourself…”What the hell happened to Yaz?” Well, coincidentally, that happens to me quite often and even when I looked them up and found out that they reunited in 2008, it still slips my mind what the hell happened to Yaz. So, in order to recall Yaz’s glory days of British synth pop stardom, I have to crank up the iPod and spin the click wheel to one of their biggest hits, yep, you f-cking guessed it…SITUATION!!! What a word killing bastard! I’m getting a class action lawsuit against this guy for ruining one of my favorite words ever!

To protect my heart from failure, I’ll be refraining from using the word S——-N from now on. Since Mike Sorrentino rose to fame thanks to MTV’s Jersey Shore, it was merely a week until I started seeing “I Love The S——-N” T-shirts.

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Can’t we be a little more creative here people? At the very least I would have expected some illustrated abdominal muscles on the front or “Lift up my shirt to see The S——-N!” Dammit, I should be this assholes PR guy. They could’ve had a shirt that would give the tuxedo t-shirt a run for its money! (This eBay store should be ashamed of themselves for creating the most uninspired S——-N shirt ever.)
Shitty t-shirts aside, one of these days, The Sexy Armpit will inform The S——-N all about how he’s permanently massacred one of the finest words in our vernacular. Hopefully by that time I’ll have ruined the words SEXY and ARMPIT for him!

I’ll leave you with a quote from one of the most influential idols in my life, George Carlin:

“…Newspeople like to say ‘police have responded to an emergency situation,’ no they haven’t, they’ve responded to an EMERGENCY, we know it’s a situation…everything is a situation!”

Where to  find these shirts:
Garden State Parkway Inspired Tee designed by Skeezoid on CafePress.com

“I Love the…” at the official Jersey Shore store at Zazzle.com, and yes…they even have t-shirts for your dog.

Mike’s Quote Tee from mdunphy89 found in her Sweet T’s store at Zazzle.com

www.SexyArmpit.com

Best of The Sexy Armpit 2009

Posted on by sexyarmpit
New Jersey

There were many amazing moments for The Sexy Armpit in 2009. I was able to cover events like The New York Comic-Con, the eXXXotica expo, The Perfect Age of Rock ‘n’ Roll, (an amazing film that I hope you will all be able to see very soon), as well as Rock of Ages, the only musical on Broadway worth seeing more than once. Moreover, possibly the most enduring effect that this blog has had on my life is meeting and starting friendships with a ton of awesome people who are not only in New Jersey, but literally all over the world. I know how risky it is becoming friends with a guy from Jersey, you wouldn’t want to get caught up in any underworld riff raff, so as the Golden Girls theme song states, “Thank you for being a friend!”

I continued some of the recurring columns that I enjoy posting regularly, and I also premiered a couple of new ones too. To read the installments of my recurring columns, just click on the icons on the right sidebar. There’s NJ’s Great Pop Culture Moments, Nocturna Mission, NJ T-Shirt Tuesday, Classic WWF/WWE Event Cards from New Jersey, and the best of all… The Garden State Playmates!

There’s no Dick here. No Carson Daly either. Just a Sexy Armpit wishing you a happy and healthy new year. The only ball dropping in New Jersey is watching the NY Giants and the NJ Nets drop the ball this season. I also want to thank each and every person who have visited this blog. Whether you’re a fan and have read it extensively or just skimmed through a few posts out of curiosity, I appreciate it. As 2009 comes to an end, here’s a list of the 25 best posts from 2009 as voted by me. These are the ones that are most worthy of reading if you haven’t checked them out already.

The Sexy Armpit covers the New York Comic Con 2009! Part 1 and Part 2
www.SexyArmpit.com

The Sexy Armpit is 5 Years Old!

Posted on by sexyarmpit
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This NJ cake, posted at New Jersey Scoop, was created by
the 4th grade students at JFK Elementary School in Raritan, NJ
The cake depicts all 21 counties and various points of interest in The Garden State

Yep, The Sexy Armpit has been around for 5 years! Recently, Geocities, the birthplace of The Sexy Armpit, was put out of its misery. I don’t think anyone was sad to see it go, but several of my earliest websites were made using Pagebuilder and published on my free Geocities account. I created all the graphics for the original incarnation and it didn’t appear to be your typical shabby free web page. The original Armpit looked like it came out of the intro of You Can’t Do That On Television, one of my favorite shows ever. Once I realized that Blogger was a better platform for me, I began transcribing my writing over to blogger. What you see in the first year of the archive is only a sampling of what was offered at the original Sexy Armpit site. I’ll continue to post some of the classic articles and reviews that appeared on the site. As always, I greatly appreciate you dropping in and reading about all the NJ pop culture minutiae that I delve into. You can be sure that The Sexy Armpit will be around to celebrate many more birthdays! Thanks again!

www.SexyArmpit.com

Welcome to The Sexy Armpit’s Halloween Countdown

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October is the time of year that excites me beyond belief. The eerie nights filled with cool air bring to mind memories of Halloween and horror movies. Halloween time is the best time to be a part of this grand blogosphere thanks to what is known as The Countdown to Halloween. It’s a month chock full of the coolest scary, ghoulish, and horrific posts we bloggers can come up with. Of course, not all posts are scary. Some posts will be about candy, costumes, or decorations and that just adds to the fun.

Whether you are a blogger, a reader, let yourself get wrapped up in the mood of the Halloween season. To begin the celebration I’ve compiled a list of the most entertaining posts from past Halloween Countdowns. If you missed any, be sure to check them out, it’s much appreciated! As for this year, there’s so much material to post and I can’t wait! Also, look out for the long awaited next installment of Jay’s Nocturna Mission!

To be part of the Countdown to Halloween, and find out what other sites are participating, visit Shawn Robare, John Rozum, and Jon K at HQ: http://www.countdowntohalloween.com/ or you can click on the link on the top right of the sidebar.

www.SexyArmpit.com