October 2011 - Page 3 of 3

New Jersey’s Great Pop Culture Moments Vol.60: Demon Knight

Posted on October 7, 2011 by sexyarmpit

“That’s right Mavis, yeah one of ’ems got Maryland plates and the other ones from New Jersey…10-4.” – Sheriff Tupper, Tales From The Crypt Presents Demon Knight

If not for The Cryptkeeper, the Tales From The Crypt series would never have spawned 3 movie spinoffs. Originally slated for a Halloween ’94 release, I remember waiting until January of 1995 to see the miserable Demon Knight. I sat in a fairly empty theater to watch this on a Friday afternoon, even dozing off a few times.

N.J License Plate!

Since the Tales series had a bunch of memorable episodes, I had high expectations for this film. Call me crazy, but when I first heard that a new Tales from the Crypt movie was coming out back then I thought it was going to be more like an anthology similar to the original Tales from the Crypt film from 1972 Unfortunately it was nothing like that and it was later indicated through several horror magazines that the script wasn’t even originally intended as a Tales From The Crypt movie.

Aside from the Cryptkeeper introducing and capping off the film, the cool cameos by John Laroquette and Dick Miller are worth noting. Other than that, I couldn’t think of a more dull cast. Jada Pinkett bored me to death, but I was happy to see that John Schuck had a pretty large role. You might know Schuck as Herman in a show that I admittedly watched as a kid, The Munsters Today.

Without any hesitation, I’ve always stood by the fact that Demon Knight sucked. I was much more satisfied with the shlockier Bordello of Blood starring Corey Feldman, since it was a more fitting horror comedy.

The Cryptkeeper needs to make a comeback! The Cryptkeeper can easily be created with CGI so he can continue hosting movies and TV shows forever. If the time comes when the voice of the Cryptkeeper, John Kassir, can’t do it anymore I’m sure it can be closely replicated in the same way that the Looney Tunes voices are. COME BACK CRYPTKEEPER…COME BACK…BUT ONLY WITH A GOOD MOVIE!

The Haunted Mansion in Long Branch New Jersey: AD JERSEUM 14

Posted on October 6, 2011 by sexyarmpit

[youtube http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kWXO22H7ngw?rel=0]

This ad will take you back to a time when haunted attractions incorporated more than just actors jumping out at you. Watch this classic TV commercial for The Haunted Mansion in Long Branch NJ and you’ll remember when the Jersey Shore had some of the best Haunted Houses in the country!

Entenmann’s Halloween Cupcakes

Posted on October 5, 2011 by sexyarmpit

Halloween time brings annual traditions that I look forward to all year. Although some of my traditions get tossed so far back in my memory banks that they only pop into my head once October rolls around. The last day of September already reminded me of the greatest Halloween treat known to mankind, Entenmann’s Halloween Cupcakes. I could just picture Sam from Trick r’ Treat devouring these luscious little things.

If I wanted to let myself go and negate all the times I’ve forced myself to go to the gym, I would eat Entenmann’s cakes, cookies, and pastries 4-6 times a day. But I’d say I eat them twice a year. Once a year I get the burning desire for their soft chocolate chip cookies which are the best cookies of all time, and during Halloween time, if they can be found in stores, their Halloween cupcakes! I’ve been eating these for many years and each year they seem to get more popular because they vanish from shelves so quickly.

What’s so great about these cupcakes is that they are just jam packed with Halloween goodness. Think back to when you were young. How many products had Halloween gimmicks? I remember there being a lot more than there is now. There were cereals, desserts, sodas, and of course candy with Halloween or monster themes. Now the Halloween gimmicks are scarce in grocery stores. The box art and the visibility of the actual cupcakes through top of the box makes them eye catching, especially for those of us who are always on the lookout for cool Halloween finds.

Represented in the cupcakes are many facets of the Halloween season. Most noticeable is the orange colored icing in honor of Halloween which is NOT flavored orange, it’s just colored that way. Then, what really seals the deal and gives them the extra Halloween kick is the few candy corns sprinkled on top. The candy corn flavor puts them over the top. It was criminal to see that one cupcake in my box lacked candy corn completely, a glaring flaw that would’ve made me put them down and take another box. Unfortunately, I was in possession of the only box left in Quick Chek. Back to the subtle levels of the cupcake. Much like how The Dude’s rug really brought the room together, hiding secretively underneath the icing is a layer of rich, soft chocolate frosting that is so damn delicious. You don’t expect there to be a coating of chocolate underneath the icing, but when you chomp down on one you’ll be in heaven. The chocolate smothers a moist, golden cupcake that isn’t lost underneath the sweet mound of sugary joy.

Like I said, these won’t help if you’re on a diet or on a strict workout regimen, but they will help keep your sanity. Entenmann’s Halloween cupcakes are one of life’s great pleasures so you don’t have to feel guilty if you only indulge a few times a year! The fact that they only come out during October makes their yearly appearance that much more of an event.

NJ T-Shirt Tuesday 85: The Misfits Mystic Fiend

Posted on October 4, 2011 by sexyarmpit

www.misfits.com

The brand new Misfits album “The Devil’s Rain,” is in stores today. Since the horror punks from Lodi, NJ always offer ghoulish graphics on their t-shirts, let’s take a look at one of the tees offered at The Misfits online store. The first tee has Arthur Suydam’s artwork from the new album The Devil’s Rain and on the right is the “Mystic Fiend” shirt. The Misfits play their annual Halloween show at The Starland Ballroom in Sayreville, NJ on 10/28/11.

Six Flags Great Adventure: Fright Fest 20th Anniversary

Posted on October 4, 2011 by sexyarmpit

Amusement parks are generally associated with summer, but for me they are more of a fall tradition. The crisp, cool air in October makes it a perfect time for rides and roller coasters while strolling leisurely around the park with your special someone. What’s also good is that you won’t get swamp ass or heat stroke from walking around in mid summer in the blazing Jersey heat. But those aren’t the only reasons of course, the main attraction for many of us in New Jersey is FRIGHT FEST at Six Flags Great Adventure.

Fright Fest is celebrating it’s 20th year and as old as it makes me sound, I’ve been going there way longer than Fright Fest existed! So I’m not a kid anymore, but as I was saying, amusement parks, especially haunted ones, have always been a part of Halloween time for me. Nothing beats the ability to go on thrill rides on a cool, starry autumn night. Six Flags Great Adventure’s Fright Fest captures this feeling perfectly thanks to their team of actors adorned with amazing masks, makeup, and costumes who go lurking around the park creeping everyone out. While this sounds like a blast to me, it’s not for everyone. It’s simple, if you don’t like being scared then don’t go. For families worried about their kids being scared there are plenty of Ghoul-Free zones designated for the faint of heart.

We kicked off October with a trip to Fright Fest. Miss Sexy Armpit gets scared when I start clapping abruptly when the Giants score, so naturally she wouldn’t be able to handle actual scares in something called a TERROR TRAIL. “Which hayride do you want to go on?” I asked her. Of course she replied with “the least scary one.” She got her wish because we wound up on Haunted Wagon Tales, the children’s haunted hayride, listening to songs like “The Addams Family” and “The Flying Purple People Eater,” while waving like dorks to friendly versions of Frankenstein, Dracula, and a so not scary swamp monster. When we answered riddles correctly such as “Who did Frankenstein take to the prom? His GHOUL friend,” then our hayride guide tossed us free candy. Would I have preferred to walk through one of the scarier terror trails? Yes, but it was one of those October nights that I love so much that it didn’t even bother me.

Fright Fest 2011 Six Flags Great Adventure

This year’s Fright Fest attractions include terror trails, haunted hayrides, and live shows. Here’s the list: The Haunted Heist, Project XI Mortuary Manor, The Demented Forest, Dead Man’s Party, Escape from the Asylum, Hypnosteria, Fright Fest Freakshow, and The Ghoulmaster’s Ghosts and more. One of the coolest and possibly most underrated part of Fright Fest is the Dead and Local Music Showcase where local rock bands take the stage throughout the night. A couple of years back we had the chance to see an awesome KISS tribute band, and last year Sludgey’s favorite band SCARLET CARSON played as well!

The iconic fountain that you see when you first walk into the park is spraying red water indicating that you’ll have a bloody good time. If you’re planning your Halloween related events, then make sure you round up your friends or significant other and feel the thrills and chills of Fright Fest at Six Flags Great Adventure!

Visit the Official Six Flags Great Adventure FRIGHT FEST website:

http://frightfest.sixflags.com/greatadventure

Classic WWF/WWE Event Cards From New Jersey #9: Hell in a Cell

Posted on October 2, 2011 by sexyarmpit

A sub par, 2 year old pay per view event is by no means a classic, but that’s the name of the column so I’ll work within it’s confines. On the night of October 4th, 2009, WWE wrestlers also worked within confines, but not of a blog column, instead they were closed inside of a 20 foot high steel cell. It all went down at the Prudential Center in Newark, NJ. It was the first Hell in a Cell Pay Per View event and also the first WWE PPV to emanate from the home arena of the New Jersey Devils.

Tickets were pricey considering that the card didn’t excite me at all. Regardless, I knew I wanted to be part of the historic event. I questioned what the hell the company was doing when they announced DX vs. “The Legacy” Cody Rhodes and Ted DiBiase as one of 2 main events of the night. There was no way that should’ve been the last match. Of course, DX won so it was a good ending to the show, but at least have a title match as the main event.

What’s worse is that the Cena vs. Orton matchup happened AGAIN, since that was during the time that they wrestled on every WWE TV show, every Pay Per View, and just shoved those two guys down our throats for a freakin’ year. Orton won the title from Cena, which was a crowd pleaser, but what should’ve been the last match was actually the first match of the night. In a bizarre move that I’m sure a wrestling insider could provide me with the reasoning behind it, The Undertaker took on C.M Punk for his world heavyweight championship in the opening match. I was so pissed when I realized this match was actually happening first.

I was following this feud on Smackdown like crazy and it was one of the best story lines they had going in a long time. Punk was in top form during his promos and there was an old school Undertaker promo quality to it also. When I heard Punk’s music hit I was hoping he was just coming out to draw some heat and boy was I wrong! Since Undertaker was on the poster for the event and the fact that he’s one of the superstars fans think of when they think of Hell in a Cell, this match should’ve been last. Taker won the World Heavyweight Championship – a big win that should have properly capped off an event called HELL IN A CELL and paid respect to the phenom!

Morrison retained the Intercontinental title against Dolph Ziggler. It’s a shame that 2 years later these guys are still languishing. They are not excelling to the levels they should be, whereas a guy like Sheamus is already one of the biggest stars in the industry in a shorter amount of time. Mickie James retained her Divas championship against Alicia Fox in an abysmal, sleep inducing match. Jeri-Show beat Batista and Rey Mysterio to keep their unified tag team titles. Drew McIntyre beat R-Truth, and Kofi Kingston defeated The Miz and Jack Swagger in a triple threat match for the U.S Championship. Overall, the DVD of Hell in a Cell is a little flat, and the commentary was unenthusiastic, but offers superbly produced recaps of the events leading up to each match as WWE always does. It was a disappointing event, but hey…at least I got this cool chair that collects dust in my kitchen!

Rumors of Jersey Devil Movie Are Bloody True!

Posted on October 2, 2011 by sexyarmpit

Since talk of the new big budget Jersey Devil movie, The Barrens, has proven true, now all we can to do is wait and hope that it doesn’t SUCK royally like it’s predecessors. Carny, and 13th Child were far from spine tingling and I hope that the producers of this film ensure that they do everything in their power to learn from previous train wrecks.

The plot centers around a father who takes his family to the vast woods of the Pine Barrens in New Jersey for a camping trip. While at Wharton State Forest, he believes they are being stalked by The Jersey Devil. All I can say is that if this gets a theatrical release I’ll be first on line, otherwise I’ll be pre-ordering it on Bluray!

Hopefully being released next fall, Stephen Moyer of True Blood will star in the film. It’s a shame that future Garden State Playmate Brit Morgan, who plays Debbie Pelt on True Blood, has not been cast in the film. She’s from Marlton, New Jersey and having a Jersey girl in the film would add to the authenticity.

The Barrens comes to you from writer/director/and producer, Darren Lynn Bousman, who was also the guy who brought us Saw II and Repo The Genetic Opera. Unfortunately though, The Barrens was filmed in Toronto, not actually in Jersey, but it’s still awesome news nonetheless!

Fall in New Jersey by Nick “N.J” Holden

Posted on October 1, 2011 by sexyarmpit

Our featured writer Nick “N.J” Holden ushers us into the fall:

Put the cover over the pool and say goodbye to the hot sunny days

When time slowed to a snail’s pace and five minutes alone

Floating on an inflatable raft took all your troubles away.

Here come all the lovely colors from the trees crashing down

Painting the grass orange, yellow, and crimson here and there

While the cold fall winds begin to come around.

Get off the beach and dusk off the backpack

And time to splurge on new clothes, books and stuff

All the while wishing the summer would hurry back.

Forget the long leisurely breakfasts and time to spare

In the morning; get ready to fight traffic on the roads and those

Stupid drivers who seem to have no worry or care.

Pack up the bathing suits, towels, and the barbecue grill

And bring on the Halloween costumes and other festivities

As we wait the other holidays that test our pockets and good will.

Hopefully the fall will be free of rain and other headaches

Because once it leaves us and winter charges in

There’s all this wicked snow for Goodness sake.

But don’t worry; all in good time

We’ll be sweating again down in Seaside

And not worrying about all these rhymes!

Month: October 2011