NJ T-Shirt Tuesday 62: The Beachcomber in Seaside Heights

This past weekend I took a trip with my girlfriend and some other friends to The Beachcomber in Seaside Heights, NJ. I wanted to check out It Ain’t Pretty, a band churning out modern rock and pop cover songs. The band is made up of Dennis Zimmer, P.J Farley (Trixter, Ra), Shawn Mars, Mark Hall and Dave Clauro. They rocked the place and helped the Beachcomber live up to it’s renewed reputation as a fun place to go to drink and let loose.

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When your establishment’s claim to fame is “This is where Snooki got punched,” it’s easy to attract business. Even their t-shirt has become a collectible with the stamp of approval: The Beachcomber Bar and Grill: The Official Bar of MTV’s Jersey Shore.

While walking around the Seaside Heights boardwalk that night, I realized why MTV chose the Seaside Boardwalk as opposed to the other stretches of the expansive Jersey Shore. Why not Point Pleasant, Atlantic City, or Wildwood? The answer is because the Seaside Boardwalk is unbeatable. There’s so much crap to do! There’s games, stores, bars, and rides; you’re almost guaranteed to have some sort of fun. So, for those watching Jersey Shore repeats thinking that Seaside Heights has a cheap, shlocky mess of a boardwalk, well, you’re absolutely right and that’s why it’s awesome.

Ghost Ship: Walk Through Ride in Wildwood!

Calling me SUPER PUMPED after I originally saw this video reporting the opening of The Ghost Ship at Morey’s Pier in Wildwood was an understatement. Since the ride opened, there were several other reports and reviews of the ride around the ‘net and in local papers that mistakenly referred to the Ghost Ship as a Dark Ride, which it most definitely isn’t. In case you plan on hitting the Wildwood boardwalk before the summer officially comes to an end, heed my warning: The Ghost Ship is merely a walk through, and not a very scary one either.

Most of the conventional aspects of a walk through haunted house are present in the Ghost Ship. There’s a hallway with inflated walls that you have to push your way through, there’s creepy actors hanging in shadows and corners, and of course there’s times when you feel like a complete idiot because you don’t know if you’re going the right way. The ghoulish displays and the creepy atmosphere were well done and deserve credit for the fine detail, but overall it just wasn’t very thrilling.

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The Ghost Ship attraction has 2 main factors riding against it. First, it’s not much different than the majority of walk through haunted houses you’ve been to, and second, it’s pretty damn expensive for such a short length of time. One adult admission will soak you nearly $11.50, and there’s not even a nice little boat ride involved! Honestly, I was hoping the entire time I was walking through the ride that I’d eventually reach the part where we all loaded onto boats. I’d be happy to pay extra for a true dark ride, whether it’s in a boat or a coaster car. I guess it would be silly to ride a boat while inside a ship.

Many people are into the walk through style attraction, so it’s easy to be sucked in by the hype and cool advertisements for it. I fell for it and was disappointed, but I bet The Ghost Ship is immensely more exciting for a kid. Boardwalk rides are all geared toward kids, as they should be. But, years ago it seemed the attractions didn’t hold back. When I was a little kid, I went to Castle Dracula on the Wildwood Boardwalk every summer, which was an authentic Dark Ride, and in comparison to The Ghost Ship, it was crap your pants scary. They just don’t make ’em like they used to! Maybe The Ghost Ship would’ve been more effective if I watched The Triangle first.

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Jersey Shore Halloween Costumes

via Costume Craze and Fashionably Geek

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It’s inevitable that you’ll be seeing people at Halloween parties across the country dressing as Snooki, The Situation, and the rest of the Jersey Shore cast this year. Dressing as a member of the Jersey Shore cast is not only fairly easy to pull off, but you’re also guaranteed to get recognized and bothered to take many Facebook photos with party goers, no matter how ridiculous you look.

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You could probably slap together a more authentic costume based on your favorite Jersey Shore character on your own, but for the lazy ones out there, Costume Craze has whipped ’em out for you. The website is offering Snooki, The Situation, and DJ Pauly D costumes in deluxe and lower budget versions. For the cash strapped, you can be The Situation with the purchase of the cheap and easy equivalent of the Tuxedo T-Shirt complete with painted on abs.

I’m not surprised that nobody wants to dress as J-Woww. With that big shot attitude of her’s she’s not exactly inspiring a generation of J-Wowwnabes. Hey, if you really want to be original why don’t you just go as a giant grenade?

NJ T-Shirt Tuesday 59: Sharks Rugby

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Here’s a tee of the rugby team that was originally called The New Jersey Sharks, but is now known as the Bucks County Sharks. They moved to P.A and they made New Jersey short one rugby team. “What’s one less rugby team?” I always say. But meanwhile, in another part of the Garden State, there was another rugby team also called The Sharks, but these were The Jersey Shore Sharks! These guys were around longer than the other Sharks, and no, they don’t replace the Gatorade with Ron Ron Juice. So, in the end, New Jersey remains successful in filling it’s quota of having at least ONE rugby team named after Sharks!
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If you read the history section of The Jersey Shore Sharks website, you’ll see that they are living up to the Jersey reputation. You’ll read more about drinking shots, starting fights, naked bodies, and wet t-shirt contests than you will about their games. That’s the way it should be, because I’m sure getting involved in rugby is all about the after parties and the travel games anyway.

12 Days of Terror (2004)

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12 Days of Terror can never share the same ocean water as Jaws, but let’s face it, no other films in the genre really can. Directed by Jack Sholder (responsible for some of my horror favorites like Nightmare on Elm Street 2 and Wishmaster 2), 12 Days of Terror, was adapted from a book by Richard Fernicola and chronicles the string of shark attacks that occurred along the Jersey Shore in the summer of 1916. It has been said that these attacks inspired author Peter Benchley to write Jaws. Although they share a similar story, 12 Days of Terror is on a lower scale (“docudrama” on Discovery Channel) and isn’t as thrilling as Jaws, but still provides an entertaining and realistic account of the Jersey shark attacks.

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Rather than center the film around the chief of police, 12 days of Terror focuses on Alex (Colin Egglesfield), a lifeguard at the Jersey Shore. The upcoming summer was to be one of the hottest yet and tons of people were already flocking to the beach and the team of lifeguards had their work cut out for them. After Alex witnesses the first kill and helps pull the victim out of the water, his instincts told him that it was obviously a shark attack. Much like Brody in Jaws, Alex encounters opposition from town officials because they do not want to close the beach. Naturally, they pass it off as an “air torpedo” from the war, or some “freak occurence” and continue with business as usual as not to lose revenue. There were actually some precautions taken, such as having steel fences installed in the ocean in Asbury Park and other shore towns as well as an investigation into shark behavior by The Museum of Natural History in New York City, which was ordered by the U.S government and the State of N.J.

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Claiming 4 lives and badly injuring a young boy, The Jersey Shore attacks were indeed horrible, but they did provide the world with invaluable information on sharks. Up until that point, the nature of the attacks didn’t jive with the existing information available on sharks. It was always thought that a killer shark would never swim near the shore, nor would a shark attack a swimmer. With that school of thought, the beach seemed like the safest place in the world.

Obviously 1916 was a very different time, and the U.S was involved in World War 1. For people who lived close to the Jersey Shore, bathing in the cool ocean was a revitalizing escape from the stress of life, much like a day at the spa is to us now. The film captures the feeling of the novelty in enjoying a day at the beach that will never be replicated. It was the ultimate refreshing getaway. Now that we are bombarded by commercials for online travel agents, and families take numerous exotic vacations per year, to those who live in Jersey, a day at the Shore is totally commonplace. The film brings us back to that simplicity, only to set the stage for the horrific attacks.

12 Days wastes no time, there’s a kill early on in the film. The gore is not excessive but what is shown is very realistic looking, especially when the first victim’s face turns blueish gray from losing so much blood. Later, we see the shark chow down on a lifeguard’s legs, yet there’s still nothing quite as vivid as the scene where Quint gets eaten by Jaws, but the film does offer some thrilling imagery, just in a more subtle way.

The effects in the film weren’t fantastic, but I’m sure the filmmakers did the best they could with the budget they were working with. Close up shots of the shark looked realistic and way superior than those in shark films you might see on say SyFy Channel. If you are the type that always nitpicks films frame by frame, it’s easy to set aside 12 Days’ faults since the shark attacks do not bolster the film the way you might think. The film shows how these attacks effected the landscape at the time and how it made the world rethink it’s previous assumptions about sharks.

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“Are you aware of the fact they’ve had shark attacks here?”

12 Days isn’t all carnage, it also weaves in some dramatic moments as well. There’s a subplot involving Alex’s brother Stanley and his relationship with Alice, the girl who Alex has a thing for too. The Captain (John Rhys Davies) is a ruff, weathered fisherman, in the vein of Quint, who takes Alex on his boat, The Jersey Rose, to seek out the killer shark.

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For a fairly accurate account of the Jersey Shore attacks, 12 Days of Terror is the best film available. There are some documentaries that have been released, but this is an easy watch. I can’t say that it’s exploding with personality or incredibly memorable, but that is mostly because shark films that came after Jaws in 1975 have suffered. And as unfair as it may seem that the blockbuster Jaws was inspired by a summer at the Jersey Shore, it’s true, so when you watch 12 Days of Terror, no matter how hard it is, try your best to momentarily forget that you ever saw Jaws.

*On the DVD bonus features there is a summary of the theory that a Bull Shark, not a Great White, was actually the culprit of at least one or two of the attacks in 1916, because of their ability to live in fresh water.

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New Jersey’s Great Pop Culture Moments Vol.43: JAWS and Jersey

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With 4th of July weekend upon us, why not escape from your pool parties and bbq’s and watch JAWS! Grab a cold drink, kick back and stream JAWS on Netflix. 35 years since it’s release, Jaws still provides thrilling entertainment. In this scene Brody (Scheider) and Hooper (Dreyfuss) attempt to convince Mayor Vaughn (Murray Hamilton) that he should close down the beach for the 4th of July weekend because of the terror that may ensue. The attacks on the Jersey Shore give validity to their case.

BRODY: “This is a Great White Larry, a BIG one, and any shark expert in the world will tell you it’s a killer, a maneater!”
HOOPER: “Look, the situation is that apparently a Great White shark has staked a claim in the waters off Amity Island and he is going to continue to feed here as long as there is food in the water”
BRODY: “…and there’s no limit to what he’s going to do. I mean we’ve already had 3 incidents. Two people killed inside of a week and it’s gonna happen again, it happened before…The Jersey Beach…”
BRODY and HOOPER: “1916!!! There were five people chewed up in the surf…”
HOOPER: “In one week.”
BRODY: “Tell him about the swimmers.”
HOOPER: “A shark is attracted to the exact kind of splashing and activity that occurs whenever human beings go in swimming, you cannot avoid it.”
BRODY: “You open the beaches on the 4th of July, it’s like ringing the dinner bell for Christ sakes!”

That’s not where the JAWS/Jersey connection ends either! The author of Jaws, Peter Benchley, who had a cameo as a news reporter in the film, worked in Pennington Furnace Supply Co. in Pennington New Jersey during the time he began writing the story of the man eating shark. It is speculated that the Jersey Shore attacks were indeed one of Benchley’s inspirations. In 2006, Peter Benchley passed away in his Princeton, NJ home.

Jersey Shore Shark Attacks in Claymation

YouTube user eastcoaster56 features this extremely creative claymation presentation summarizing the Jersey Shore shark attacks of 1916 on their page. If you enjoyed the California Raisins, and Penny on Pee Wee’s Playhouse, then watch “The True Story of the Matawan Maneater” and let it bring you up to speed.

WELCOME TO SHARK MONTH!

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What if MTV’s Jersey Shore wasn’t about guidos? What if it was about the horrific and devastating string of shark attacks along the Jersey Shore that took place in July of 1916? All month long here at The Sexy Armpit, forget about living every week like it’s Shark Week, we are going full speed ahead into SHARK MONTH! All month long stop by The Sexy Armpit for posts that incorporate New Jersey and Sharks. Think that sounds preposterous? Think again! There will be posts at least 3 – 4 times a week throughout July so we would love for you to come back and enjoy the marathon with us! And if we have any difficulties luring in some Great Whites, Snooki would make perfect shark bait, don’t you think?

Ad Jerseum 9: Coca Cola in Wildwood

Ad Jerseum: So much Jersey advertising it’ll make you vomit!

During last year’s trip down to Wildwood, NJ, I snapped pics of Coca Cola ads specially made for Wildwood. All you need to do is walk up and down the boardwalk for merely a few seconds before you get the feeling that the Coca Cola company may actually own the entire city of Wildwood.

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Banner ads hung from every light pole, and every single soda machine and beverage freezer was plastered with Coca Cola ads. I haven’t been down there yet this year, but I’ll wager that they rolled out a whole new ad campaign. Last year’s ads had a cool retro sensibility that I think Coca Cola should use more often.
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This ad lacks the vintage look of the previous banner, but gains a girl in a bikini. If you look at her right boob, you’ll notice that the ad began peeling off. I found it on the side of a refrigerator in a convenience store on the boardwalk. Hopefully I’ll make it down to Wildwood this summer to see if all the ocean water was replaced with Coca Cola. 
*Not only does Coca Cola have several bottling facilities in the southern NJ area, but Maywood NJ is home to The Stepan Company which produces the non-narcotic cocoa leaf extract used in the soda.

NJ T-Shirt Tuesday 53: Aqua Teen Jersey Shore Shirt

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Aqua Teen’s “Greetings from The Jersey Shore” T-Shirt
It won’t be long before people everywhere want to literally vomit at the mere mention of the names Snooki, JWoww, and The Situation. With the 2nd season of MTV’s Jersey Shore creeping up on us, it won’t be long before your cable channels are infested by guidos again. Don’t worry though, when their 15 minutes is up, you can always fall back on the original crew to hang out down at The Jersey Shore, The Aqua Teen Hunger Force. The cult Adult Swim series is still going strong, in fact, just last week Aqua Teen Hunger Force Volume 7 was released on DVD. Personally, I’d rather listen to a talking ball of meat than JWoww.

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