“May 1983,” written in English Class, 11th grade

Photobucket
The hysteria for George Lucas’ 3rd installment of his Star Wars epic was to hit screens on Friday May 25th. Many days passed as I joyfully played with my Star Wars action figures, as if Lucas was Santa and watching my every move. Figures were spread all over the floor of my rec room where many galactic battles took place. I begged my older sister to play, after all, I needed a Princess Leia. It was a time when she actually came in handy, but a little brother would have done a better job at playing with action figures.
After waiting anxiously, Friday finally came. “We’re going to see Return of the Jedi!!” my dad announced to me with great enthusiasm. He seemed just as excited as I was. Before jumping around uncontrollably like Mr. Peepers, I froze for a second, puzzled. Did he mean that we were going to see the real thing and go up in a space ship and watch the rebellion get revenge over the dark forces of the evil Empire? I was perplexed. I actually wasn’t sure what was going to happen. You see, this was the first Star Wars film I would be experiencing in the theater.
When we pulled up at the old Menlo Park General Cinema, it all came together. As we walked through the glass doors, I was immediately consumed at the sight of the huge, lush lobby complete with video games and adorned with posters. The aroma of popcorn filled the air and invaded my nostrils. Naturally, it was imperative what came next, “Mommy, I want popcorn!” My dad bought the tickets and as we slowly made our way to the theater I took in every last detail of my surroundings.

My sister held my tiny hand and directed me to look at the Return of the Jedi poster on the wall. I became mesmerized. It was a beautiful collage with Luke Skywalker looking heroic, grasping his trusty lightsaber, Han Solo pointing his blaster at me, the beautiful Princess Leia, cuddly Ewoks, and lurking in the background, the sinister Darth Vader. Just as any other normal kid at the time, I was petrified of the Dark Lord of the Sith. The bottom of the poster, sealed in silver, read RETURN OF THE JEDI.
We made our way through the doors and down the aisle of the theater. It was very dark except for the glow of the previews which projected onto the enormous screen. I didn’t care what was on the screen, it was all a blur. I was in awe of the cavernous room filled with what looked to be a thousand seats. There were so many people, it was packed to the rafters. I stood in the aisle staring upward, mouth open, marveling at how high the ceiling was. Finally, I focused on the screen and remembered what I wanted to do. I jetted in light speed to the front row. The entire row was empty and thinking I hit the jackpot, I plopped myself down in the center seat. With popcorn in lap and feet crossed dangling off the seat, I was ready, but I realized I was missing something. MY FAMILY was a few rows back filing into a patch of 4 seats. My sister must’ve alerted my parents to the fact that I was nowhere to be found. As I looked back I saw my dad waving me back to sit with them. In classic stubborn child mode, I swung my head back and forth in an “absolutely not” fashion. They realized that I would not be giving up my seat.
I won out and my parents and my sister left their seats and sat with me in the first row. That wouldn’t have flown in any other instance, but since it was Return of the Jedi and they were there so I could see the movie, they gave in. Within minutes, the screen went black and John Williams’ score blasted like an ion cannon throughout the theater while the scroll brought us up to speed. Episode VI: Return of the Jedi:

Photobucket
This experience left a lasting impression on me because it made me a lifelong Star Wars fan, and it began my obsession with movies. At that point in time, going to the movies was still a big deal. Sure there are “event” movies, but not many of them can come close to the magic that the original Star Wars trilogy brought to the screen. More and more younger kids are becoming Star Wars fans and I’m lucky to be able to tell them that I saw my favorite installment of the trilogy in its original theatrical release.

NJ T-Shirt Tuesday 17: Eastside High School, Paterson NJ

Photobucket

Eastside High School
NJ T- Shirt Tuesday kicks off the first ever Back to School Week here at The Sexy Armpit! Today we’ll take a look at T-shirts from the actual Eastside High School in Paterson, NJ. If the school sounds familiar that’s because Eastside High is the subject of the 1989 film Lean on Me starring Morgan Freeman. If watching yet ANOTHER Morgan Freeman movie isn’t up your alley, then you’ll also get to see Benson’s Robert Guillaume, “Candyman” Tony Todd, an appearance by The Sopranos’ Michael Imperioli, and a young uncredited extra by the name of Ahmed Best who probably wished he quit acting after this film because he’s better known as JAR JAR BINKS!!!
The film’s story is based on the unorthodox methods of former Eastside High principal Joe Clark. The high school was overrun with drugs, violence, and low test scores, so Clark sought to improve the students education and change the policies of the inner city school. Although the film wasn’t 100% accurate to reality, it still managed to capture the essence of Clark’s disciplinary mission.

PrepSportswear created the 2 custom Eastside High School T-shirts pictured above. They also offer customized jerseys and sports apparel for many other high schools.
Here’s the official website for Eastside High School and its sports teams “The Mighty Ghosts.” Click here for the official Eastside High School apparel store.

EXXXOTICA NY comes to The NJ Expo Center 9/25 – 9/27!!!

exxxotica ny
EXXXOTICA, the biggest and best adult event and consumer show will be coming to the New Jersey Expo Center in Edison, NJ. Last year the people of Secaucus wouldn’t allow such a “smutty” event in their fair city. Yep, the Meadowlands Expo Center dropped the butt plugs on this one. Luckily, Edison picked up the butt plugs and will be ramming them into the NJ Expo Center in just a few weeks. The Sexy Armpit.com will be in attendance at the 2nd annual EXXXOTICA expo and so should you!
Photobucket
Over 100 of your favorite Porn stars, Suicide Girls, Burning Angel Girls, and more will be at EXXXOTICA. It’s a who’s who of the adult entertainment industry and there’s much fun to be had. To add to your spontaneous combustion after you read the list of appearances, there will be adult products featured, stage shows, seminars, meet and greets, live performances, and Q&A panels. I’m sure by Saturday night, you’ll be ready to POP THAT COOCHIE because 2 Live Crew will be in the house performing 2 sets for all in attendance! If you miss out on 2 Live Crew, don’t worry because there’s also going to be DJ’s spinning music, the Ms. Exxxotica competition, fashion shows, sexy game shows, and tons more.

exxxotica ny
Unlike the intimate experiences you share with your laptop, EXXXOTICA gives you the opportunity to meet the girls you lust after face to face, and in the flesh! Here’s a SMALL sample of the stars appearing at EXXXOTICA: Tera Patrick, Sasha Grey, Jenna Haze, Joanna Angel, Bree Olson, Eva Angelina, Teagen Presley, Kayden Kross, Ron Jeremy, Sean Michaels, Seka, and Tabitha Stevens. There’s so many more so check out the complete list at the official site.
For ticket information click here. Oh and FREE F’N PARKING!!! WOOO-HOOO!!!
eXXXotica NY
September 25th – 27th
NJ Expo Center
97 Sunfield Avenue
Edison, NJ 08837

Real Housewives of New Jersey with Jamie-Lynn Sigler

http://player.ordienetworks.com/flash/fodplayer.swf

Here’s a spoof on the abysmal show “The Real Housewives of New Jersey,” from www.FunnyorDie.com. The sketch stars Jamie-Lynn Sigler doing her best Marisa Tomei in My Cousin Vinny impression. I despise The Real Housewives of New Jersey show and any of its geographical variations, but this is hysterical and I hope it never disappears from the Internet.

Doritos Collisions: Cheesy Enchilada & Sour Cream

Photobucket
I got the chance to inhale a bag of these suckers today!

These may be old news to you, but the appearance of a different variety of Doritos Collisions at the nearest Hess Express store got me all pumped up. Obviously, Captain Lou Albano didn’t have to put me in an arm ringer to get me to try a new Doritos offering. After completing my bag rip/savor smell technique, I enjoyed this new flavor mash-up immensely, even though they don’t beat the original Nacho Cheese flavor.

Flavor accuracy on these Doritos are mediocre at best, but that doesn’t mean they aren’t phenomenal. Not many artificially flavored foods successfully replicate the taste of Enchiladas and Sour Cream, but if we needed at least one to meet a quota, that’s where these Collisions come in.

How does the Cheesy Enchilada and Sour Cream combination fare against the competition? They have easily edged out the frat fav. Hot Wings/Blue Cheese variety and they manage to tie it up with Zesty Nacho/Chipotle Ranch. The Enchilada flavored chips have a really nice kick to them, and the Sour Cream provides a creamier balance, so in that respect they are similar to the Hot Wings/Blue Cheese Collisions.

The title of best Collisions flavor still belongs to the Pizza Cravers/Ranch, but I’ve yet to test out the Habanero/Guacamole. Have you tried them? If so, let me know how they rate! You might as well weep for The Last Call Jalapeno Popper and Tacos at Midnight because they’d never be asked to appear in a shameless product placement moment in the upcoming, imaginary Wayne’s World 3.

NJ T-Shirt Tuesday 16: Retro DC T-Shirts

Photobucket

Fellow Jersey blogger Tommy Salami of Pluck You Too tipped me off to this weeks NJ T-shirt Tuesday offering. Tommy sent me the link to the Retro DC T-Shirt Shop which is run by Steve Jencks of the horror/b-movie blog Lost Highway: A Detour Through B-Movies and Cult Films. Steve is a versatile graphic designer who specializes in illustration, web design, and logo branding. Jencks has created many awesome T-shirts available online through his Retro DC T-Shirt Shop.

In addition to his other Zombie, Lost Highway, and Pinball Playtime designs, Jencks offers 2 New Jersey related T-Shirts. The first, “New Jersey ate my Neighbors,” features a graphic of a green, throbbing, one eyed monster reeling in a nice lady from the neighborhood. He gets hungry, can you blame him? The 2nd one is the “Jersey Devil Dark T-Shirt,” and it’s badass. The skeletal remains of the Jersey Devil look as if they are buried in the state like dinosaur fossils! It’s an original take on the Jersey Devil legend, one that I have yet to see, especially in t-shirt form!

The majority of shirts offered at Retro DC are available in a slew of different colors so you aren’t limited to the black ones I’m showing you here. Also, at the top of his online shop, Jencks mentions that you can contact him for your very own custom t-shirt design.

I was curious to find out if Steve Jencks is from Jersey because many people who aren’t from Jersey despise this state and would probably never spend the time designing a shirt inspired by the most toxic state in the U.S. Who can blame them? I was able to ask Jencks through his Twitter page (twitter.com/Losthighway) and his reply was “Nope, I’m not from Jersey, just a big fan. I love Weird NJ and all the legends. Hope to visit someday!” Right on Steve!

10 Things I Love About Rob Zombie’s Halloween

Photobucket

I’m shocked that Rob Zombie’s Halloween 2 didn’t fare too well at the box office this past weekend. Are people still skeptical about this beloved horror franchise being in Zombie’s demonic hands? I figured they would’ve gotten over that by now. Or is it just that moviegoers would rather watch crappy, uninspired retreads? If you saw Halloween 2 this weekend here’s my question to you: Would you have been more satisfied by a run of the mill Halloween film on par with every installment released from ’88 – ’02?

Zombie’s Halloween 2 didn’t live up to my expectations as a Halloween film nor as a Rob Zombie film. The film was well made, but the atmospheric tension and creepiness that the 1978 original had in abundance seemed to be tossed aside. Even Zombie’s first Halloween outing retained some of that mood. Halloween 2 didn’t even feature John Carpenter’s Halloween theme music until the end. This sequel served as an excellent follow up to Zombie’s Halloween reimagining, but not for the franchise as a whole.

In contrast to 2009’s Friday the 13th reboot, Zombie’s Halloween 2 seems to grant Michael Myers freedom to grow, whereas Jason Voorhees remains basically the same. Is that what we want? One dimensional horror icons? We want them to be what we expect them to be, nothing more, nothing less. They should kill, they should be scary, and they need to maintain a consistent look. In Halloween 2, that Shatner mask started to look like someone actually SHAT on it. Like in Nolan’s Batman Begins and The Dark Knight, every facet of the film is based in reality to help refresh Batman’s story and supply the franchise with endurance to last far into the future. Clearly, Michael Myer’s mask wouldn’t have stayed pearly white with all the schmutz he gets all over it. Zombie gave it a valiant effort, and no matter how derided, his vision for the Halloween films served to inject new life into the franchise.

To bring the greatness of Zombie’s first Halloween into focus, here’s a list of what made it so frigging cool.

10. Sherri Moon is ridiculously hot.

9. The opening scene blasts KISS’ “God of Thunder,” aside from the usual KISS songs, this underrated track hasn’t appeared in many films at all. Zombie deserves credit for having the balls to showcase it in his movie, which means he’s not embarrassed about being a KISS fan. White Zombie covered the song for an EP and on the VH1 Rock Honors Rob Zombie sang lead vocals on the track while joined by a supergroup including Ace Frehley, Slash, Tommy Lee, Scott Iian, and Gilby Clarke. Even young Michael Myers is wearing a KISS Destroyer t-shirt.

Photobucket

The KISS t-shirt is a sign of the times and it adds to the macabre tone. One of the underlying themes of the film involves Michael Myers’ reliance on masks to cover up his tortured soul, so it’s appropriate to make reference to KISS’ ghastly faces.

8. It’s clear that Malcolm McDowell was a fine choice for Loomis. McDowell puts a very different and interesting spin on the character. F-cking Shirtuckers!

7. Not taking anything away from the 1978 original since it’s the best film of it’s kind, but there’s more layers to this films story. We discover that Michael Myers has an Oedipus Complex which is ripe for dissection in film class.

Photobucket

6. Shit, I would have an Oedipus Complex too. Look. OMG. OMG.

Photobucket

5. In this film we come to realize that Michael Myers is quite a ladies man! Look how he fondles sister’s leg:

Photobucket

4. Ben Tramer = the male horror movie version of Gwendolyn Pierce. Ben Tramer must’ve been one dreamy heartthrob.

3. Annie Brackett (Danielle Harris) delivers the sluttiest line of the movie: “Do you want to f-ck me? Let me hear you say it.”

Photobucket

2. The doucher Paul (Max Van Ville) who Annie’s making out with follows that line up with “It’s so fucking warm” WTF??? Before that Annie scolded him for almost ruining her expensive sweater, “…hey, don’t pull it like that, you’re gonna stretch it all out! Stop it…this is expensive idiot!”

1. The who’s who list of cameos include Clint Howard, Sid Haig, Mickey Dolenz, Sybil Danning, Ken Foree, Dee Wallace, Bill Mosely, Leslie Easterbrook, Danny Trejo, Courtney Gains, and Adrienne Barbeau. That about covers every guest at your next horror convention.

If Dimension films wants to continue the exploits of Michael Myers at this point, they sure as hell can. Michael Myers always comes back, and at this point perhaps the fans would enjoy a more traditional take on the character. But after we’ve seen Zombie’s tragic and psychotic look behind Myers’ mask, would an archetypical Halloween film really impress us?

Bob The Goon: Jersey’s Number One Guy!

Photobucket
Henchmen, for some reason, were always available and willing to abet The Joker. There must’ve been a waiting list to become one of Joker’s indistinct thugs, but why? The job of Henchman didn’t bring glory or kudos, it didn’t get their name in the Gotham Globe, and it undoubtedly lead to their demise. Whether it was thug #1 or Yock and Boff, they won’t be remembered for any of their dirty deeds against Batman or Gotham City. The Joker was the one who got all the press, save for one exception, and he actually had a name. His name was Bob, and motherf-cker even had his own action figure. It was from Toy Biz, but still an action figure nonetheless.
Photobucket

As if being known as a nondescript “henchman” was bad enough, Bob was known as ‘The Joker’s Goon,” or “Bob The Goon.” He was the highest level henchman The Joker had, hence “THEE GOON,” this guy wasn’t 2nd GOON or 6th GOON. That title was officially bestowed upon him when the Joker told Bob that he was his “Number One Guyyy.” Bob was a shabby man who looked as if he was freshly plucked from catching some zzz’s in a dumpster in a Crime Alley. Coming from those humble beginnings, having the Joker take him on as his henchman infused him with confidence. He felt like he could conquer the world, or at the very least, finally get his G.E.D. He was as loyal as they came, and he possessed a shimmer in his eye that showed us that a little part of him wished someday he could be half the criminal mastermind that The Joker is. He clung to that hope, even if it was all in vain.

When you’re down on your luck and you want some direction in your life, being the right hand to a super criminal like The Joker seems like an appealing and prestigious position. I’m almost positive The Joker didn’t offer any health benefits, and definitely no 401k. Perhaps dental? He did have one helluva smile. Love that Joker! In the case of Bob, The Joker granted him as much vacation time as he could ever possibly imagine when he blew him away point blank.

Photobucket

All other goons and henchman owe Bob a huge debt of gratitude for being such a superior role model. Bob was an icon, a go getter, and when he did hire a prostitute, he treated her with respect. It’s a shame that Bob was never able to take advantage of his fame. If he lived, he may have been able to ride the lucrative personal appearance circuit. Who wouldn’t want a B&W 8×10 of Bob signed “Bob, The Joker’s One and Only Muthaf–kin’ Goon!”

Bob The Goon was portrayed by Tracey Walter in the 1989 Batman film. It’s no secret that Jack Nicholson is a Jersey boy, but Walter also hails from the Garden State. He was born in Jersey City, NJ, and according to his IMDB bio, he “was working in a car parts store in Jersey City when he stumbled upon acting…” Walter’s impressive resume includes appearances in over 150 popular films and TV shows.
For more on Bob’s Toy Biz action figure, check out Cool Toy Review.

NJ T-Shirt Tuesday 15: Mickey Mouse Chillin’ in Jersey

Photobucket
Unfortunately, this isn’t another practical joke, Mickey won’t actually be chillin’ in Jersey anytime soon. Even if he was, he’d need the proper attire. Here he’s looking more like he was auditioning to be an extra in a McDonaldland commercial. Mick would have looked more appropriate rocking a pair of stone washed jeans and a wife beater, but he got the sunglasses right though! If the folks at Disney animation weren’t so uptight about their squeaky clean image, maybe we’d get an animated short called Mickey’s Sopranos attached to the beginning of The Princess and the Frog? If I was Mickey, I think I’d pick Jiminy Cricket as my consigliere.
If we had it our way here in Jersey, we would’ve had a nice gigantic Disney Theme Park in place of Xanadu, the debacle that’s presently taking up space in the Meadowlands complex. Until then, we can fantasize about how cool it would be to see racks at the gift shops filled with these t-shirts at Disney World: New Jersey.

Recently, eBay Seller VintageCandee1 featured this ’80s Disney T-Shirt with Mickey on the front leaning against the words “New Jersey.” At the bottom of the graphic, the fine print reads “The Walt Disney Company by Velva Sheen.”

WWE SummerSlam 1989 at The Meadowlands Arena

summerslam 89

It was the year Indiana Jones went on his Last Crusade, it was also the year that brought us the sequel to Ghostbusters, and the first Batman movie since 1966. In the news we saw the Exxon Valdez Oil spill, Ted Bundy was executed in an electric chair, and the WWF was brave enough to stage their first pay per view event in the swamps of East Rutherford, New Jersey.

Photobucket

In my world, it wasn’t too soon after Summerslam ’89 that the ’80s wrestling blitz would begin to take a nosedive. I’ve been a loyal WWF/WWE fan since ’83, and never got caught up in the terrible mess that was WCW. Once the WWE proudly slid into 1990, it was obvious to true fans that the stories and ideas were beginning to run out of steam. Not to worry, because today we’re taking you back to ’89 when I was still a fan revelling in the drama and action created by these larger than life characters.

20 years ago, the 2nd SummerSlam marked the first time a live Pay Per View event would emanate from The Meadowlands Arena, then known as Brendan Byrne Arena. The Pay Per View intro was spectacular and made you want to jump into your TV set and inhale the exciting atmosphere. The SummerSlam music and logo graphics were the ones you got used to seeing, not some crazy trendy looking logo that bears no resemblance to the original and has no history tied to it like this years.

The Coliseum Video VHS copy of SummerSlam ’89 contains an intro that shows fans filing into the Meadowlands Arena, buying t-shirts, and a kickass little kid doing his best Ravishing Rick Rude impression. I was pissed when I bought the WWE SummerSlam Anthology DVD and this intro was completely cut out. Those minute details of the VHS release helped me remember the era. When the SummerSlam events were edited for the new Anthology, those scenes probably seemed unimportant and easily discarded. Seriously WWE, is saving 1 minute of time really that precious? The fans want the versions that they watched over and over again at home or rented from the video store, not some chopped up version. Thanks to YouTube member neilsmith207, we’re able to see the original introduction filmed in East Rutherford NJ.

For the first time since Rocky III, Hogan was on the big screen in No Holds Barred, which happened to be “the greatest movie of all time” if you asked me after I saw it. I remember my Dad taking me to the theater to see it, and it was such an event. My dad was quite a trooper when I was a kid, always taking me to WWE live events, fan festivals, and even shlocky movies starring Hulk Hogan and Kurt Fuller. WWE had a perfect opportunity to capitalize on the film’s feud between Tiny Lister and Rip (Hogan). WWE passed it off that Hogan and Zeus had real conflict on the set and it fell out into the WWE ring, making a perfect main event for SummerSlam. Hogan teamed up with his best bud Brutus The Barber Beefcake, to take on the fierce combo of The Macho King and Zeus with Sensational Sherri in their corner. To vote on the petition to get No Holds Barred onto an official DVD release, check out the bottom right of this page.

Jesse the Body Ventura and Tony Schiavone handled the commentary. Schiavone’s voice had energy and enthusiasm, but I still missed Heenan’s sarcasm and one liners, and Monsoon’s familiar voice and sayings like “it is deafening in here,” and “…the anticipation, you can cut it with a knife.”

red rooster

Summerlsam 89 was a solid event that kicked off with The Hart Foundation vs. The Brain Busters, and followed up with Dusty Rhodes vs. The Honky Tonk Man. I had no interest in Dusty Rhodes when I was kid, I just didn’t get his shtick. He didn’t have that special sheen that Vince helped create in his wrestlers. Dusty was a guy from “that other company” that I only read about in the black and white pages of Pro Wrestling Illustrated. He sure got the crowd pumped up though. I just scratched my head when I saw an older, overweight bleach blonde guy wearing yellow polka dots dancing around in the ring. It didn’t make much sense to me. I think if I grew up in the ’70s I might understand his appeal. Thrown for a loop after losing the match and getting hit in the head with his own guitar, Honky Tonk cut one of his funniest promos ever, acting completely like Elvis trying to get to his concert. “Somebody help me find the stage!”

Undefeated Mr. Perfect takes on…yes…wait for it…”The Red Rooster” Terry Taylor! Remember what I was saying about the WWF’s nosedive? Even as a kid, I wasn’t thinking about math tests, or little league, I was thinking “what the cluck was wrong Vince McMahon letting this gimmick get on TV?” I knew something was amiss when I saw Terry Taylor poking his head forward and back like a rooster with his red spiked hair. What a debacle. I don’t know what was more unnerving to me even at that age, an overweight middle aged guy wearing yellow polka dots and a police hat, or the fact that they tried to put a guy over as a rooster. The late great Mr. Perfect won the match, and as Jesse the Body said, “Mr. Perfect stays Perfect.”

In six-man tag action, The Rougeau Brothers and Rick Martel with Slick and Jimmy Hart took on the action packed team of The Rockers and Tito Santana. Santana is one of the most underrated Superstars in WWE history, and now he owns a hair salon in NJ! The Rougeaus and Martel got the W.

Photobucket

Ultimate Warrior was interviewed about his heated feud with Ravishing Rick Rude and he had this to say: “…Ravishing Rick Rude as i promised you will surrender to the gods above as i beat you ONE, TWO, THREEE!!!” Rude entered the ring and grabbed the mic: “What I’d like to have right now is for all you fat, out of shape, SummerSlam sweathogs to keep the noise down while I take my robe off and show the ladies what a reeeaal sexy man looks like, hit the music…” Rude’s robe dropped to reveal The Warrior’s face on his airbrushed tights. During the bout, Rowdy Roddy Piper appeared at ringside and lifted his kilt to moon Rude. Warrior took advantage of a distracted Rude and won the Intercontinental belt back only to swing it over his head like a complete maniac. Careful, those things are like $300 bro.

Duggan Demolition

Hacksaw Jim Duggan and Demolition? What a ragtag group that is. Demolition was so much more effective as heels. It doesn’t seem possible that these guys could subdue 3 behemoths such as Andre the Giant, Akeem, and Big Boss Man but they were going to try. Jesse The Body ranted about Duggan’s face paint: “how disrespectful to the flag of America to have it on that ugly face.” Duggan’s 2×4 sealed the deal and scored the win for Demolition and Hacksaw.

The match between Hercules and Greg Valentine was an excuse to beef up the heat between Ronnie Garvin (who was curiously serving as ring announcer) and Greg “The Hammer” Valentine. Unbeknownst to the ref, Valentine put his feet on the ropes to secure the pin and got the 3 count. Regardless, Garvin announced Herc as the winner. BTW- who greenlit the “Garvin Stomp?”

Here, Sherri, Savage, and Zeus cut a promo by “the cauldron of madness” that would help them destroy Hulk and Brutus:

Superfly Jimmy Snuka took on The Million Dollar Man Ted DiBiase. Snuka was counted out during a scuffle with Virgil on the outside of the ring.

Photobucket
Superfly soars through the air to get retribution.

According to Hogan in an interview with Mean Gene, he was on his way to the Meadowlands on his Harley, and his 24-inch pythons parted the Hudson River on his way to get onto I-95. Hogan and Brutus discussed their secret weapon and doing some struttin’ and cuttin’.

Photobucket

Miss Elizabeth was introduced to even the playing field. As soon as she entered the ring, Jesse Ventura buries Elizabeth and proves why he was the best color guy WWE ever had: “She’s a little gold digger, Randy Savage made her what she is today. She was a hashslinger down the street in Jersey.” The main event had a predictable, yet satisfyingly fun result. Hogan hit Zeus in the face with Sherri’s purse, then a body slam, and ended it with the leg drop for the win. Then Hogan hit Scary Sherri with an atomic drop, and as she stumbled, Elizabeth hit her in the face with Sherri’s own purse. Next, The Barber took his hedge clippers and snipped off the end of Sherri’s pre-cut hair extensions.