Christmas Archives - Page 4 of 7

NJ T-Shirt Tuesday 90: The Misfits For Christmas!

Posted on December 14, 2011 by sexyarmpit

The Grinch is a mean one…and a FIEND!!!

It’s never been depicted on a map and Santa Claus isn’t even aware of it, but right beside the Island of Misfit Toys lies the Island of Fiends. Everyone who resides there is covered in ghoulish fiend makeup and Misfits songs are piped through speakers all over the island. During Christmas you might see a lot of people wearing these holiday themed Misfits t-shirts. The first one features a fiendish creature who bares a resemblance to The Grinch and is rocking a skeleton jacket and gloves. We know The Grinch is a humbug, but who knew he was such a punk?

The Misfits Santa T-Shirt

What do you think this scary Santa will leave for you under your tree? Maybe The Misfits latest album The Devil’s Rain? I’d like to have The Misfits record a cover of “The Most Wonderful Day of the Year” from the scene on the Island of Misfit Toys in Rudolph The Red-Nosed Reindeer specifically for me!

New Jersey’s Great Pop Culture Moments 62: Christmas Evil

Posted on December 10, 2011 by sexyarmpit

I hope you’re not planning on asking Santa for a lifetime subscription to Penthouse magazine or you’re in for it. Released the same year as To All a Good Night, Christmas Evil is the true classic of Christmas horror films. If Psycho and Halloween are looked at as pioneering films in the genre, Christmas Evil holds the same honor when it comes to Christmas horror movies. Don’t get me wrong, I still love Silent Night, Deadly Night, but the majority of Christmas Evil was actually filmed right here in New Jersey. Originally released as You Better Watch Out and also known as Terror in Toyland, this largely overlooked horror movie offers dark humor and a creepy, yet yuletide atmosphere.

Can you dig it? Santa traded in his sleigh for a custom van!

It’s a familiar story, one that has been copied numerous times after the release of both Christmas Evil and To All a Good Night. At the time in 1980, these two films just seemed like cheap throwaway horror film gimmicks, but to many horror film buffs they are classics now.

You can read about Christmas Evil all over the Internet, but the basic gist of it is that on Christmas 1947 little Harry loses his shit and starts cutting himself after witnessing Santa Claus getting naughty with his mother. When Harry realizes it was his father under the Santa suit he grows up wanting to be like the Santa he thought existed. Fast forward to his adult years, Harry has become straight up obsessed with Christmas and becoming Santa. He even keeps a book of all the good and bad kids around town. Dressed as Santa, Harry begins to go on a rampage around town to right all the wrongs he’s witnessed in various ways. The difference about this film and other Santa slashers is that Harry is actually playing a moral judge, he’s just not going around hacking up everyone in his path.

In the horror sub genre of Christmas or Holiday horror films, there aren’t too many that are worth revisiting. Christmas Evil is the type of perennial classic that you can go back to in the same way you re-watch A Christmas Story and How The Grinch Stole Christmas every holiday season. Every time I watch it I wonder why it hasn’t been labelled the quintessential Christmas horror movie yet. Is Silent Night Deadly Night better? I don’t think it is and neither do my fellow bloggers:

“It’s one of my favorite film endings of all time, the absolute perfect end cap to what is a madly magical film.” – Freddy in Space

“…the pedigree of most holiday-themed slasher movies isn’t very high, but Christmas Evil is pretty exceptional.” As perfectly summed up at Marcus’ Movie Life

And while I disagree with his Silent Night Deadly Night sentiment, I tend to agree with Charles Tatum’s Review overall which states that “Christmas Evil belongs just below Gremlins and Black Christmas and well above Elves and the moronic Silent Night Deadly Night when it comes to the unique Christmas horror genre.”

After a little girl says to him “Santa, your shirt’s dirty,” Harry replies “There’s a…a lot of pollution between here and the North Pole.” That sure is true, and although it’s never claimed outright in the film, the story itself takes place in suburban New Jersey. At least from my countless viewings over the years, aside from a couple of glimpses of NJ license plates, Christmas Evil doesn’t mention the state except for thanking Montclair and Glen Ridge in the closing credits.

Also check out Christmas Evil at one of our favorite horror blogs, Kindertrauma!

Crazy Christmas Cavalcade From Quasi Interesting Paraphenalia Inc.

Posted on December 7, 2011 by sexyarmpit

[youtube http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k1uzylOlqno?rel=0]

I’m a long time reader of David W.’s blog, Quasi Interesting Paraphernalia Inc. There you’ll find a blend of nostalgia, pop culture, vintage books, ads, and brochures, as well as original works from David as well. To get his readers into the holiday spirit he’s decorated the blog with a How The Grinch Stole Christmas theme and he’s also gone and done a little something special. Check out David’s original series of holiday video shorts he’s producing called the Crazy Christmas Cavalcade at his YouTube page! The first installment is posted above. It brought back memories for me and it was really funny. I can’t wait for the next one! Great job David!

Jersey Shornaments

Posted on December 5, 2011 by sexyarmpit

Vinny, Sammie, J-Woww, Snooki, and Situation all had a nice run on MTV’s Jersey Shore. With the low attention span of the public eye and the constant need for something new, It seems that Jersey Shore peaked before heading off to Italy. This doesn’t mean that next season won’t score high ratings, it just means that the novelty is about to wear off, and I’m thankful for that.

Considering that more than half of the cast isn’t even from New Jersey the authenticity is shot down. Several seasons into the show the entire country now believes that these people represent New Jersey. Here’s the rundown: The Situation was born in Staten Island and grew up in New Jersey, Sammi is from Hazlet NJ, and late to the party is Deena from New Egypt NJ.

It’s not about being proud that I was born and bred in New Jersey, it’s more about the fact that people throughout Jersey are JERSEY…these people are not. The fact that much of the cast is from Staten Island and New York is a pretty good indication of the type of demographic that visits the Jersey shore. The stereotypes we are being punished with stemming from this show should actually be transferred to the out- of-towners who give us a bad rap.

After all of that, how could I bring myself to put Jersey Shore ornaments on my Christmas tree? I’d love to know how many people around the world have these on their trees this year! If you have one let us know in the comments!

Did You Buy a Crummy Christmas Tree?

Posted on December 1, 2011 by sexyarmpit

[youtube http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3yaCYIKwavY?rel=0]

You may not have known that Newark NJ native Fred “And bring your jukebox money” Schneider of the B52’s has a side band called The Superions. The song “Crummy Christmas Tree” appears on the whimsical synth pop act’s 2010 Holiday album called Destination…Christmas! We used to call them Charlie Brown Trees but “Crummy” is definitely another way to describe one.

What I Got For Christmas – 2010 Edition

Posted on December 29, 2010 by sexyarmpit

I’m not going to sit here and pout about how old I feel or how Christmas doesn’t effect me anymore. OK, so, I admit I can’t watch How The Grinch Stole Christmas if it’s past 8 PM or I will fall asleep on the couch. Naturally, Christmas time has become more hectic as I’ve gotten older, but it’s still one of the most fun times of the year. I don’t know anyone who doesn’t like getting presents (of course there’s always some jackass who says they hate getting gifts), but giving gifts is even more fun. Some of the gifts I gave this year included a custom sculpted Dean Martin statue, an iPod, and a Kitchen Aid mixer. Those items may not intrigue you, but they delighted their receipients. Now it’s time to show you some of the stuff that I got for Christmas. It was impossible to fit every gift into the picture so some of the items are not shown, but I’ll tell you all about them.

My girlfriend knows how I feel about snuggies. But she went out on a limb anyway and bought me the Superman snuggie as a goof thinking that I would get a kick out of it. I think it’s actually really cool. See how the super hero/fanboy aspect changes the perspective of everything? For example, my reaction if you gave me a package of napkins for Christmas: “Oh great…napkins,” but if they had the Bat symbol on them look at how quickly the reaction changes: “OH THESE ARE SOME F*CKING COOL NAPKINS! THANK YOU!!!” Something tells me that those napkins are never coming out of the cellophane! In the end, the Superman snuggie was a fun gift, but not because it’s a snuggie, there’s more to it than that. Donning this snuggie actually transforms you into a comfy, cozy Superman because it has Superman’s costume on the front of it! The only problem is, when I put it on, I don’t feel like saving the good citizens of Metropolis from a disaster, I really feel like zonking out on my couch. It’s a little couterproductive, but at least I’ll be Superman in my dreams.

It’s nearly impossible to buy me a DVD or Blu-ray disc that I don’t already have. There are so many movies that I enjoy but I don’t see myself ever watching again. For me to own a movie it has to have a high rewatchability factor. Such is the case of Scott Pilgrim on Blu-ray because it kicks ass and it’s visually exciting. This was one of the only things I really had on my imaginary wish list. The vintage record album drink coaster set was a really cool gift too. I do have several coasters at home, but these are unique and look exactly like their original vinyl counterpart. (If you have really keen eyesight, you noticed that the one visible in the picture is a RUN DMC album.) There was also STAR WARS Mad Libs! which are even more fun if you fill them in with fellow Star Wars fans. *Here’s an example of what my friends and I came up with: “The Force is an energy field created by all living FECES” (plural noun), and “A Jedi can also use the Force to move objects with his or her TONGUE” (part of the body).

A couple of weeks before reading about it on X-E, I saw the Christmas Smurf plush at Macy’s with my girlfriend and I wanted one to add to my Christmas condo decorations. I was always a big Smurfs fan as a kid, but I have yet to buy any of the new Smurf collectibles. Once the movie comes out there will be Smurfs everywhere, so this is just the Smurf of the iceberg. What makes this Christmas Smurf different from the other ones in the store was that he had a ticket for Lady Gaga at the Prudential Center in Newark attached to his scarf! I don’t care if you want to disown me now that you know that I am a Gaga fan. After seeing Lady Gaga live in concert at Boardwalk Hall in Atlantic City this past July, I rank her show just below a KISS concert. It’s a huge production that has a storyline, elaborate choreography, and music that she pours her heart and soul into.

As you can see, I was very fortunate and Santa Claus treated me well this year. I also received plenty of nice shirts, ties, a scarf, tea tree shampoo, money, and gift cards. Thank you to everyone for the AWESOME gifts! What were some of the gifts you received this year?

Christmas Train Display at Barron Arts Center

Posted on December 25, 2010 by sexyarmpit

Here’s some footage I took of the Barron Arts Center’s annual Christmas Train Display. The display will continue until 12/28 so go check it out! Please enjoy it in HD! Merry Christmas!

Barron Arts Center
582 Rahway Avenue
Woodbridge, NJ 07095

SNL Gets Cookie Monster, Sexy Armpit Gets Johnny Fiama

Posted on December 22, 2010 by sexyarmpit

Thanks to Muppet Wikia‘s vast amount of Muppet minutia, we now know that Johnny Fiama hails from Camden, New Jersey, a fact he revealed during his appearance on an episode of Family Feud. Now that we know he’s a Jersey guy, it’s not surprising that his last name is actually an anagram for Mafia!

Heeeeere’s Johnny…Fiama that is!

In 2002’s It’s a Very Merry Muppets Christmas Movie, Johnny Fiama sings a hilarious “Jingle Bells” accompanied by Rowlf on piano. Soon he gets interrupted by his loyal monkey sidekick, Sal Minella, who has a Christmas gift for him.

“I sold my moped to buy you this solid gold record player!”

The Muppet character Johnny Fiama didn’t show up to the party until the short lived prime time TV show Muppets Tonight, but he’s been a welcome addition the gang ever since. Johnny seems to be stereotypically Italian, and inspired by the great crooners such as Tony Bennet, Dean Martin, and Frank Sinatra. He even hosted “The Johnny Fiama Show” on Muppets Tonight.

“It looks like somebody’s been drinking a little too much egg nog!”

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The Perfect Holiday (2007) – A Jersey Christmas Movie

Posted on December 21, 2010 by sexyarmpit

The grand interior of The Landmark Loew’s Jersey Theater in Jersey City

decked out for J-Jizzy’s Christmas Wonderland Party

So many people claim they are originally from Jersey, ergo that must mean when someone sings “I’ll Be Home For Christmas,” they really mean they’re going back to Jersey…to Jersey. Queen Latifah is one of those people. She’s a tough chick who was born in Newark, NJ and raised in East Orange, who went ahead and crowned herself the Queen of Hip-Hop. There’s never been any other female hip-hop artist that has been formidable enough to threaten her crown, but what’s funny is that I can only recall one of her songs, which is “U.N.I.T.Y” from 1994. Most of what I know about the former power forward of the Irvington High School girls basketball team, aka Dana Owens, is that she’s become more of a movie star, and unfortunately 2007’s The Perfect Holiday is not one of her better ones.

The kids go to see Santa at Jersey Gardens Outlet Mall in Elizabeth, NJ

The plot of The Perfect Holiday is trite Christmas fare, something you might see on ABC Family Channel or better yet…Hallmark Channel rather than in theaters. Gabrielle Union (the hot rival cheerleader in Bring It On), shows that she needs several more acting classes to become Julia Roberts or Sandra Bullock who she was attempting to channel in this movie. In her role as Nancy, she plays a mother of 3 who has just separated from her rapper husband. Benjamin (Morris Chestnut) is the guy that swoops in to steal her heart as he’s playing Santa Claus at Jersey Gardens Mall in Elizabeth, NJ. Nancy’s cuter-than-Olivia-Kendall daughter Emily (Khail Bryant) tips Benjamin off that her mom is in need of a compliment. Chestnut’s performance was only forgivable because it was so predictable and cheesy. Charlie Murphy is J-Jizzy, a way less likable P.Diddy sort of hip-hop artist who has left his 3 kids with the hurdle of adjusting to their mother’s new boyfriend (Chestnut). Forget all that, the heavy guy from Couples Retreat, Faizon Love, is the best and funniest part of this movie.

Faizon Love makes the front page of The Star Ledger!

The pace is fast, the editing is terrible, and they crammed pretty much every Christmas song you can think of into every second of the film. Even having the majestic Queen Latifah as one of the producers did not give this film the boost it needed. Latifah’s screen time as “Mrs. Christmas” is minimal, and the dude who wishes he was Don Cheadle, Terrence Howard, also appears as her extremely annoying cohort, Bah Humbug. The film was directed and co-written by Lance “Un” Rivera, the Unentertainment Records CEO and fomer Biggie Smalls collaborator. He also directed another film I’ll be writing about in the future, 2004’s The Cookout.

I can only recommend The Perfect Holiday to those of you who love the actors in the film, as well as to hardcore New Jersey buffs like myself. Our newspaper, The Star-Ledger makes an appearance, and so does tons of crappy looking computer generated snow. In case you decide to go out on a limb and Netflix this steaming lump of coal, you’ve been warned.

Garden Palace Lanes in Clifton, NJ – if you look closely you’ll see CGI snow

Filming Locations: Hoboken, Jersey City, Bergenfield, Rutherford, Westfield, Jersey Gardens Mall in Elizabeth and Garden Palace Lanes in Clifton.

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American Angel’s “Best Part of Christmas”

Posted on December 15, 2010 by sexyarmpit

This one goes out to Miss Sexy Armpit!

Jersey hard rock fans know all about American Angel. If you aren’t familiar with them, look ’em up! They are one of the most underrated rock bands of the late ’80s and early ’90s. Unfortunately the evil cloud known as grunge came along and wiped out many of the glam metal and party rock bands signed to labels at that time. Since then it’s apparent that these bands actually outlasted the great depression of music. And, not to worry, lead singer Rocco Fury and a new band lineup recorded 2007’s Vanity and began playing occasional shows as American Angel. Chances are you will be seeing more of American Angel, since I read on Rocco’s Facebook page they have a tour in the works for 2011, but he’s a funny guy and I can never tell when he’s being serious or not! Check out some of the music at iTunes and HERE.