sexyarmpit, Author at Sludge Central

Lady GaGa Likes THE BOSS

Posted on May 23, 2011 by sexyarmpit

[youtube http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2Zz5wxYj7RY?rel=0]
Lady GaGa’s enthralling Monster Ball Tour stopped at the Prudential Center in Newark on April 22nd, 2011 and The Sexy Armpit was there to witness the spectacle. Since I previously saw GaGa in Atlantic City, I wasn’t surprised when I saw her dramatic Monster Ballads type performance of “You and I,” during which she pounded away on the keys of her flaming piano, even occasionally foregoing her fingers to use her stiletto heel. She usually dedicates “You and I” to someone and this night it went out to her grandfather, a New Jersey native. I’m glad that YouTube member music4life324 captured GaGa’s intro to this song because here GaGa elaborates on her other associations with New Jersey. GaGa always makes it well known that she’s from New York, but it’s interesting to see how many New Yorkers have plenty Jersey connections as well.
Even several years after her debut, GaGa is still winning fans over. Recently, HBO premiered their presentation of The Monster Ball Tour taped at Madison Square Garden. Even the queen of glam rock on the Internet, Allyson from Bring Back Glam recently described GaGa’s latest video for “Judas” as “Metal,” and I fully agree. Of course there was a barrage of comments left on her post, many of which took exception to putting the pop icon in this category. Unfortunately, there aren’t many rock or metal bands who are badass enough to be called METAL nowadays! Isn’t it sad when our pop icons have more metal attitude in their petite 5’1 firecracker of a body than most actual metal bands today? I’ll take GaGa’s stiletto heels, pyro, and exposed butt cheeks any day.
It’s also pretty cool to know that GaGa knows who the BOSS is and I’m not talking about Judith Light. Many of the tracks on GaGa’s latest album “Born This Way” (available today) are influenced by Bruce Springsteen. She even had “The Big Man” Clarence Clemons do a guest spot on “Edge of Glory.” The following GaGa quote from an article on Billboard.com is taken from an upcoming MTV documentary, Inside the Outside, airing 5/26:

“Springsteen had such an influence on our home,” she says. “My father gave me, I believe it was for Christmas, a Bruce Springsteen songbook for the piano and on it was ‘Thunder Road,’ which is my favorite Bruce Springsteen song. My dad said, ‘If you learn how to play this song we will take out a loan for a grand piano, a baby grand.’ So I remember it was the hardest thing for me. I was playing these huge (classical) pieces, like 15 pages long, … and then there was this Bruce Springsteen song. I opened up the book and there was like chords, guitar chords. I was so confused. I didn’t understand it, so I just started to read it and eventually, eventually I got it down.” – Lady Gaga Reflects on Springsteen Influence for ‘Inside the Outside’ Doc by Phil Gallo 5/18/2011 Billboard.com

NJ/NY KISS Expo Video Recap by Matt Porter!

Posted on May 22, 2011 by sexyarmpit

[youtube http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uhtFXcyxAUs?rel=0]

My man Matt Porter, video creator extraordinaire, has came through yet again with a killer video recap of the KISS EXPO that happened last weekend in Somerset, NJ. Matt has rectified the issue of the Expo being referred to as the New York/New Jersey KISS EXPO, renaming it the NJ/NY KISS EXPO. I somehow feel partly responsible for that HAHA! Since I couldn’t be there this time, the video is an excellent substitute. Thanks Matt! Go over to his YouTube channel and LIKE the video!

New Jersey’s Great Pop Culture Moments Vol.55: Nearing Grace

Posted on May 21, 2011 by sexyarmpit

Scott Sommer’s 1979 novel Nearing’s Grace may have had more impact back then, especially to a young teen male audience. I would wager that more male teens read books back then, before being inundated with computers, video games, and porn in the mid ’90s. The 2005 film adaptation Nearing Grace is set in South Orange, NJ, so as Dr. Evil would say, I’m going to “…throw it a frickin’ bone.” All you need to know about this film lies in that cheesy, overused, but awfully accurate movie description, “a coming of age tale.”

It’s 1978 and Henry Nearing is a teen coping with the loss of his mother. Since his father and brother are drinking and abusing drugs to cope with her death, the only shoulder he has to lean on is the girl next door. Ashley Johnson, the actress who made me want to plant the remote control into my skull as little Chrissy Seaver on Growing Pains, plays Merna, a girl who adores Henry. She’s his loyal friend and has always been there for him, but Henry’s got a boner for Grace (Jordana Brewster of Fast and the Furious) who he thinks is hot, mysterious, and exciting, but is basically a total skank. Look, we all make the mistake of falling for the wrong person, Henry was just thinking with his dick.

The story was not compelling which translated to a bland film. It’s hard to blame director Rick Rosenthal (Halloween II, Halloween Resurrection, Smallville) since the film seems to be faithful to the novel. Even though I’ve never read the book, the entire film gave me a sense that it had to have been based off a book. I wanted desperately for the film to be one of those cool undiscovered gems, but it lacked a certain edge that other films and TV shows set in the ’70s have. For instance Almost Famous, Dazed and Confused, and even That ’70s Show, all evoked the vibe of that era. I’m not the only one who felt this way. In an October 16th 2006 review, Morgan-23 on IMDB “…didn’t feel one way or another about it.”

Nearing Grace does offer a heartwrenching performance by David Morse (Disturbia) as Henry’s father, and the kid from BIG, David Moscow, seemed to be channeling Jeff Spicoli as Henry’s stoner brother. The real highlight of the film is the fantastic soundtrack. Unfortunately it doesn’t rescue this film from the depths of downerville. You’ll hear The Kinks, The Ramones, Tommy James and The Shondells, and The Velvet Underground among other bands.

For a teen drama set in the late ’70s Nearing Grace is everything it sets out to be. The only thing it’s not is fun. I would recommend this one only if you were an angsty teen back in the late ’70s OR Jordana Brewster gives you rumblings in your utility belt. And for those interested in the New Jersey aspect of the film, it’s very slight and lacks authenticity because it was actually filmed in Portland, Oregon.

Mourning The Macho Man Randy Savage: My Macho Memories

Posted on May 21, 2011 by sexyarmpit

Sexy Armpit & Miss Sexy Armpit (top) Macho Man (bottom)

I’M IN MACHO MISERY RIGHT NOW. The news of the passing of Macho Man Randy Savage has wrestling fans and the entire world buzzing right now. Savage was not only an icon of sports entertainment but a fixture in popular culture for many years. Describing Savage as a hero of mine is an understatement. I’m sure there will be an outpouring of tweets, blog posts, and YouTube tributes, and rightfully so, but this post will serve as a collection of my own Macho Memories.

Many of my Macho Man memories involve Miss Elizabeth. She was such a huge part of his mystique after he hired her as his manager. It was a controversial move to hire a sexy female valet who many thought had no mastery of the wrestling business. As we all know, they were a match made in heaven and hopefully they’ve met up so Savage could hoist her up on his shoulders once again for old time sake.

I had been into wrestling for about 2 years at that point. During that period in the WWF I remember everyone buzzing about Macho Man and Elizabeth. They were a hot topic and the couple grabbed the attention of everyone, not only wrestling fans. When the Miss Elizabeth LJN action figure first came out I remember wanting it so bad. I waited and waited and finally I got a special opportunity from my parents on Christmas Eve that year. They let my sister and I open each others gifts. After ripping open the paper I was so excited to see that my sister got me the Miss Elizabeth figure! Now Macho Man would walk the aisle with some arm candy.

Some people look back fondly on the greatest moments of their life. Some cite winning a high school football championship, getting married, or winning a huge sum in the lottery as random memorable life moments. Believe it or not, some of the greatest moments of my life involve WWF and Macho Man Randy Savage. His heel win to become I-C Champ, Savages feud with George the Animal Steele who was in love with Elizabeth, Savage vs. Steamboat at Wrestlemania 3, all the events that lead to the formation of The Mega Powers, The Wrestlemania 4 tournament which concluded with Savage winning his first WWF World Championship and sharing the greatest moment of all time in the WWF with Miss Elizabeth and The Hulkster in Atlantic City NJ. Then the Mega Powers exploded in the same venue at the next Wrestlemania. Years later he was in memorable feuds with Jake The Snake and Undertaker, Flair, and Ultimate Warrior.

Life was so simple back then. Who cares if I sound old! On sunny and hot summer days I would walk down the local Rite Aid or ask my Dad to bring me to Quick Check and scan the magazine racks for the official WWF Magazine. A couple in particular made me literally explode with excitement. My sister dropped by while I was at a neighbors house to bring me the July 1988 issue with Savage on the cover. I nearly went into convulsions. I don’t think kids get this excited anymore over a magazine, but it made my month back then. I’d worship the pages and read the same articles over and over. It sounds incredible, but I can remember the exact moment I got most of them. I still have those magazines too.

Growing up, my best friend Frank and I were immensely influenced by Macho Man. It was easy for two best friends to call themselves The Mega Powers, but it was another to start filming themselves wrestle at a time when taping yourself wrestling wasn’t en vogue at all. At least in my neck of New Jersey, taping backyard wrestling matches wasn’t something that people we knew ever did. Leave it to us to spend our Friday and Saturday nights recording promos and matches while our friends went and “socialized” with each other. In our first match ever, we chose to explode the Mega Powers yet again just for the hell of it.

I know a lot of people claim that their parents are the greatest, but My Dad is seriously in the Dad Hall of Fame. He’s always been a fan of WWF right along with me. The fact that he interacted in my little obsession with me meant more than anyone could ever imagine. Through the big wrestling boom in the ’80s and then through the times when WWF fans got made fun of for still liking it well after it’s popularity surge was over – it was so cool to be able to share those moments with him. Of course he used to watch Saturday Night’s Main Event with me and bring me upstairs after I fell asleep on the couch, but there was one time in particular years later that will always stick out in my mind.

After Monday Night Raw premiered in 1993 I made it a big TV event. It was the highlight of my week. I set up my TV chair and grabbed my drink and snacks. Occasionally my Dad would watch with me, but other times if he was busy he would tell me to let him know if something good happens and he’ll come watch. That’s the kind of thing that meant a lot to me. I didn’t toss the baseball around much, I didn’t have much interest in sports or fixing cars, my world was all about WWF. He was a big fan of Macho Man and Razor Ramon at that time.

In 1994, prior to Wrestlemania 10, Randy Savage and Crush began a feud that was pretty hardcore in WWF at that time. My father and I were shocked as we witnessed Crush turn on Savage. Crush pressed Savage up over his head and dropped him onto the steel barricade, lacerating his tongue. We were both in awe of how this played out in a very realistic way. Since that was just before the computer era really took off, there were no spoilers or dirt sheets to ruin the storylines, so it was a vivid and surprising night on Raw. The feud culminated at Wrestlemania 10 in a falls count anywhere match, just over the river at Madison Square Garden in NYC. It was Savage’s last appearance at a Wrestlemania.

In recent times, Savage has kept a low profile but I’ve kept his spirit alive as much as I could. I’ve dressed up as Macho Man twice in the last couple of years. The first time was for a Halloween Costume Party at Asbury Lanes and my girlfriend dressed up as Miss Elizabeth. You can read more about that in this post. The next time I went with the classic lavender Macho Man T-Shirt and matching bandanna for my friend Jane’s surprise ’80s style birthday party. Each time it was a big hit and everyone was complimenting me on how good I pulled off the look. I even won runner up in the costume contest at Asbury Lanes.

I will miss you so much Macho Man, you were larger than life to me and no one will ever come close to having your unique blend of electric charisma and ring skills of a king. I hope the Fink announced you into heaven with Pomp and Circumstance echoing throughout the universe. “We’re gonna climb that mountain together and we are together forever Oooooh Yeah!” Elizabeth…DOWN THAT AISLE!

Jersey Shore Gone Wilde

Posted on May 20, 2011 by sexyarmpit

[youtube http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Mhk5Rjz7xk0?rel=0]

Even though you may have seen it already, I couldn’t resist posting this video mash up of Jersey Shore and Broadway’s The Importance of Being Earnest courtesy of The Roundabout Theatre Company. This is the first part of a multi part series created for Playbill by The Importance of Being Earnest stars Santino Fontana and David Furr.

New Green Lantern Roller Coaster at Six Flags Great Adventure!

Posted on May 19, 2011 by sexyarmpit

Season Pass holders have access to a special preview of the ride

from May 19th thru May 22nd

What’s better than The Dark Knight Coaster at Six Flags Great Adventure? Almost every ride in the park HA! After Six Flags debuted the last DC Comics Superhero inspired ride The Dark Knight Coaster in a vastly disappointing 2008 premiere, it seems that they are about to redeem themselves.

Presently, The World’s Finest heroes are both heavily represented at Great Adventure. Batman and Superman rides are among some of the best in the park (aside from the lame Dark Knight coaster) which leaves the other members of the Justice League green with envy. One DC hero in particular isn’t going to take it sitting down.

Opening May 25th, the new Green Lantern coaster will be a thrilling experience based on GL’s mystical power ring. The super smooth ride stands 154 feet tall and reaches speeds of 63 mph. It’s now among the tallest and fastest coasters in the world. According to the Six Flags press release the ride will be a towering “…15 stories high with over three quarters of a mile of twisting green steel, this new stand-up coaster will take you on a journey of epic proportions.”

I can’t think of a better movie tie-in than a brand new roller coaster at Six Flags Great Adventure. Green Lantern is finally getting the credit he deserves. People will be coming from all over the place to ride this one! It’s a 2 minute and 30 second adrenaline rush for most people. For me, it’ll be 2 minutes and 30 seconds pretending I’m flying around like Hal Jordan. Hopefully the standing up-upside down part won’t make people morph their green energy into puddles of vomit.

Six Flags Great Adventure
1 Six Flags Boulevard
Jackson, NJ

Full Moon Horror Roadshow Recap from The Man Cave

Posted on May 18, 2011 by sexyarmpit

Geof, The Master of The Man Cave, recaps our experience at the Full Moon Horror Roadshow and Film Festival over the weekend at the Forum Theater in Metuchen, New Jersey. I was anxious to go to the Roadshow after seeing the promotional video and reading about all the tables, contests, and autograph signings they have presented at other stops on the tour. On top of all that, the premiere of Evil Bong 3 would be in 3-D, and Sniff-O-Rama. How could I not fall for all these gimmicks, especially right in Jersey no less?!!

First, we realized the ring leader Charles Band did not show, then we saw that the attendees didn’t show up either! It’s unfortunate because the way the Roadshow is promoted makes it seem ridiculously awesome, but it ultimately fell extremely short of my expectations. The handlers seemed pretty unprepared and the whole night seemed disorganized. What made the night worse is that Evil Bong 3-D was nowhere near as good as its predecessors. For more, go check out Geof’s excellent coverage over at The Man Cave.

BIOCH License Plate

Posted on May 18, 2011 by sexyarmpit

I delved into The Sexy Armpit News Archives and found a news report from last year that aired on New York’s Fox 5 news. Reporter Cora-Ann Mihalik broke this truly newsworthy (sarcasm) story about Kim Romano a resident of Manville, New Jersey. The anchor at the time, Ernie Anastos, kept f*cking that chicken by introducing the story as “License Plates Personalized with Profanity!?!”

It all started with an anonymous complaint to the NJ DMV. Some idiot was so offended by Kim Romano’s plate that they took the precious time out of their life to send an e-mail complaint to the DMV about how appalling it was. 4 years prior to the story Kim says her BIOCH license plate started out as a joke but the DMV computers processed and approved the name without any problems. Then, at the time of the news report, the NJ DMV was forcing Kim to give the plates back and making her choose a new plate.

Mihalik interviewed a couple of bystanders regarding this crucial news story. First, Michele Tubby, yes that’s actually her name, said “I don’t want my kids seeing it,” while a retired police officer said it’s not offensive because it looks like it says Bocce Ball. Not sure if that was his attempt at humor or if he’s dislexic: BIOCH/BOCHI BALL. I wouldn’t have given this much thought if I saw this plate on a car on the road. I’d probably get a laugh but that would be the extent of it considering it doesn’t look remotely offensive to me.

The report shouldn’t have implied that the word was offensive from the get go. The report would’ve been more effective if they polled the audience asking if people thought it was offensive or not and went into a tirade about how f*cking ridiculous the person was that complained about it. If it does look offensive to some, it’s obvious that Kim is the one who is the brunt of the joke. License plates don’t call other drivers names, they typically describe the driver of the car. Unless it’s this plate which I have already applied for: URNASS. If you can’t figure that one out then you need to go to text messaging school.

For those who are Bioch curious, a Google search will yield the infinite amount of ways to spell “Bioch,” and I must say that they way it’s spelled on the plate is not my first choice. I would spell it BIATCH primarily because there’s an “ahh” sound in there, and many people even get a little crazy and throw the letter Y in for good measure. To me, BIOCH just looks like the abbreviation for BIOGRAPHY CHANNEL.

Not sure why Cora-Ann Mihalik conveniently left out the fact that Manville NJ is primarily known to many people in the state as the home of the establishment formerly known as Frank’s Chicken House now referred to as Delilah’s Den, but now you know. So there you go, BIOCH!

Monopoly Cake via Retroist

Posted on May 16, 2011 by sexyarmpit

via Retroist via Hannah Gibbons’ Flickr (thecakemaiden)

This is a beautifully crafted Monopoly cake by Hannah Gibbons that I found at The Retroist. Monopoly is one of the most famous board games of all time and many of the street names on the board are actually in Atlantic City, NJ. (Anyone want to buy Baltic Ave.?)

“When Monopoly was devised in the 1930’s, Atlantic City was chosen because it epitomized the kind of glittering tourist destination that many Depression-era Americans could only fantasize about visiting.”

Kocieniewski, David. and Fleisher, Linda. “Atlantic City May Lose in New Monopoly.” NY Times
28 Apr. 2006: http://www.nytimes.com/2006/04/28/nyregion/28monopoly.html

NY/NJ KISS EXPO…in NEW JERSEY OF COURSE!

Posted on May 14, 2011 by sexyarmpit

[youtube http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GLaozPCLD1k?rel=0]

I’m already pissed off about Blogger yanking my last post after their 24 hour outage so the snubbing of NJ in the KISS EXPO name hasn’t helped. Yet again New York has been given top billing over New Jersey. We’re now AFTER the forward slash. It’s like “Oh yeah, and New Jersey you can come too!” Even though the name of the event is the NY/NJ KISS EXPO, it’s clearly taking place in Somerset, New Jersey, more than 40 miles away from New York City. We’re used to stuff like this happening so I’m just ranting about because I’m not going to be able to make it to both the KISS EXPO and the FULL MOON FILM FESTIVAL which is happening later today at the Forumn Theater in Metuchen, NJ.

Check out the video posted above created by my friend Matt Porter. He’s a master at making videos, especially KISS related ones! I know he’ll be there and he’ll give me an inside scoop. I wanted to go to both events today but my mind is telling me yes and my wallet is telling me NO! Chances are if I went to the KISS Expo I would’ve dropped lots of dough. If you’re going, I hope it’s a CRAZY NIGHT and have a COLD GIN for me. Ahh, I couldn’t resist!

KISS EXPO – TODAY
Crowne Plaza Hotel
110 Davidson Ave
Somerset NJ 08873

Author: sexyarmpit