WWE Archives - Page 7 of 8

Congrats to NEW WWE Champion Jeff Hardy!

Posted on December 15, 2008 by sexyarmpit

Despite his erratic record, tonight’s WWE Pay Per View Armageddon finally saw Jeff Hardy come away with the WWE Championship. Jeff is known to put his body on the line with risky aerial assaults and daredevil ring tactics which makes attaining such an accomplishment worthwhile. Hardy began his career as a “jobber” like many others, but he continuously left fans in awe by risking his career in the name of sports entertainment. Screw his drug problem, Hardy is the real deal. The Sexy Armpit congratulates Jeff on 15 years of hard work! WWE Smackdown comes to The Sovereign Bank Arena in Trenton on 12/27 and The Izod Center in East Rutherford on 12/30 and The Sexy Armpit.com will be there!

They Live Starring John Cena?

Posted on December 12, 2008 by sexyarmpit

io9.com has an exclusive interview with WWE’s John Cena regarding the possibility of him starring in a remake of 1988’s They Live. Will he step into Rowdy Roddy Piper’s role for the modern day take on the film?

I’m glad to read that io9 is referring to Cena positively. All you Cena haters aren’t being forced to watch RAW last I checked. Go watch TNA, UFC, or Hulkster’s Celebrity Wrestling!

The Most Embarrassing Songs on My iPod

Posted on September 9, 2008 by sexyarmpit

Everyone’s bound to experience one of those “uh-oh” moments if an embarrassing song starts playing on your iPod. Picture it, you’re rolling down the main street of your town, windows down, iPod on shuffle mode, and you have your friends in the car. Right after rocking out to “Welcome to the Jungle,” you hear the beginning chords of “Sexy Boy” the Shawn Michaels’ theme song or the Native American war chant that kicks off Tatanka’s theme song. Some of you may not even realize that they’re both WWE theme songs and in that case you may sidestep some shame. Although, you have to admit that at least a little part of you would squirm in your seat a bit.

How about when your iPod segues from Rob Zombie’s “Superbeast” right into “How Will I Know” by Whitney Houston? It’s totally cool to have Whitney on your iPod, especially if its one of her big hits, but when you’re in the car with a bunch of guy friends, and at the very least trying to act cool, your attempts are murdered by the sweet sound of synthesizers. You can win people over with goofy favorites like Wham’s “Wake Me Up Before you Go-Go,” but if their song “Freedom” comes on then your stock descends faster than the Delorean running low on plutonium. (pre-Mr. Fusion of course)

Having your friends ask you to unlock their car doors so they could tumble out while you’re still driving is a possibility if they hear you have the Baywatch theme song on your iPod. Whereas “Break the Ice” by John Farnham from the Rad soundtrack will actually give you street cred with those “in the know.” It’s possible to save yourself when a song comes on that the person doesn’t know but you’ll have to have a good enough story and reason for giving it the push to your almighty iPod. Here’s some examples: You can be forgiven for having Winger’s “Seventeen,” since it’s fun and nostalgic, but once you start digging into their catalog and “Out for the Count” from Karate Kid 3 comes on, then there’s not much that can save you at that point. Don’t let me forget “California” by Phantom Planet. It’s not really the song’s fault as much as it’s what I do when I’m listening to it. I reminisce about scenes from the O.C in a blurry, dramatic, tear-laden montage in my mind. I’ll dig deeper for you as I present a compendium of some of the most embarrassing songs on my iPod:

The Oompa Loopa Song from Willy Wonka & The Chocolate Factory
WWE Songs – The Boogeyman theme “Im the Boogeyman and I’m coming to get you!” and
Land of a Thousand Dances
Play That Funky Music by Vanilla Ice – Shit, how is it that you’re the life of the party if you play “Ninja Rap,” but you may as well crawl into a kitchen cabinet if “Roll ‘em Up” comes on.
Skeet Surfin’ by Nick Rivers/Val Kilmer – Top Secret Soundtrack
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Theme Song – Even though they’re the world’s most fearsome fighting team, you’re friend’s cut you no slack. Just hearing this theme emerge from a segue will always illicit some sort of heckle, so you’re lucky if you’re in the car with a fellow fan boy. That date of yours sure won’t be impressed that you’d rather listen to theme songs of old cartoons rather than Ne-Yo or Rhianna.
Other TV Theme Songs – Muppet Show, Charles in Charge, Mr. Belvedere, Perfect Strangers, Pee wee’s Playhouse Theme by Ellen Shaw (Cyndi Lauper). An interesting fact is that the Saved by the Bell theme song is always an overwhelming cross gender favorite.
King Tut – Steve Martin It’s a very funny song, but trying to hustle it to someone who’s never heard it proves challenging.
I’m Breathless songs inspired by the film Dick Tracy by Madonna Depending on your company in the car this album was obviously more embarrassing than Swept Away and Shangai Surprise combined.
Video Game Theme Songs – The magical songs from Alex Kidd in Miracle World make you come off like a real geek but you can get away with songs from Out Run because they sound like some underground new wave revival band from NYC. You can’t go wrong with the Super Mario brothers theme.
I Wanna Have Some Fun – Samantha Fox
Da Ya Think I’m Sexy? by Rod Stewart – I don’t care, I still love it.
Hot Rod Hearts – Robbie Dupree
Give it To Me Baby – Rick James
Party All the Time by Eddie Murphy and Rick James
Bruce by Rick Springfield here Rick talks about how he gets mistaken for “The Boss.”
Dancing In Heaven (Orbital Be-bop) by Q-Feel, Girls Just Want to Have Fun soundtrack
Sexyback – Poison rips off Justin Timberlake
Get this Party Started by Pink This is on the list just for being too girly.
Glory of Love – Peter Cetera from the Karate Kid part 2 soundtrack
Christmas songs up the wazoo – Merry Christmas Baby by my fav. Pepe the Prawn and R2D2 We Wish You a Merry Christmas! with vocals by Jon Bon Jovi! Girls definitely take heed when they are informed that Jon Bon Jovi appears on the song.
Paula Abdul Songs – Straight up, Cold Hearted Snake. Remember the video for Cold Hearted Snake that was freakin’ hot at the time
Stars are Blind by Paris Hilton
Physical by Olivia Newton John (It fulfills my ’80s aerobic girl fetish)
Step by Step by New Kids on the Block
Call Me Back by Mike Flowers Pops
Notorious by Loverboy
Take It Higher by Larry Greene, Over the Top Soundtrack
Playing with the Boys by Kenny Loggins, Top Gun Soundtrack. Apparently the scene that it plays in is called “homoerotic.” Strange…I didn’t realize a bunch of sweaty, shirtless guys in cut off jean shorts playing volleyball was at all gay.
Ewok Celebration/Finale by John Williams Affectionately known as the “Yub, Yub Song.” You’re pretty much slayed like a Rancor Monster if you get caught with this one playing.
We Don’t Have to Take Our Clothes Off by Jermaine Stewart
Flashdance…what a Feeling by Irene Cara
Howard the Duck performed by Lea Thompson and Holly Robinson Peete
Songs from The Grease 2 Soundtrack – Score Tonight, Who’s that Guy? among others.
Rock and Roll Part 2 by Gary Glitter. A top contender for most embarrassing track on my iPod since Glitter is a convicted pedophile. I hope I’m not denied entry into the plane to Vegas because I have this!
Anything by Franz Ferdinand
Who’s Johnny – El Debarge
Kookie by Ed Byrnes
The Last Dragon by Dwight David, The Last Dragon Soundtrack
Smooth Up in Ya – Bulletboys
Porno Star by Buckcherry Ok this one is literally embarrassing. Imagine if your parents are in the car and the lyrics “don’t you know we fuck for money, I’m a big dick motherfucking porno star” blast through the speakers?
About Us by Brooke Hogan
I’ve Had the Time of My Life by Bill Medley/Jennifer Warnes, Dirty Dancing Soundtrack
Copa Cabana by Barry Manilow
Solid as Rock by Ashford and Simpson
Soldier of Love by Donny Osmond

I want to know…what are some of the most embarrassing tracks on your iPod?

New Jersey’s Great Pop Culture Moments Vol. 4: WWF’s Land of a Thousand Dances

Posted on September 1, 2008 by sexyarmpit

Sometimes I sit and wonder why I feel like I haven’t reached my full potential in life. Moments later it occurs to me that I could recite all the banter from “The Wrestling Album.”

Back when WWE was called The World Wrestling Federation, 1985 to be exact, not only was I pretending to dodge bullets from the Libyans’ van, but I was also playing the shit out of this album cut by all the WWF wrestlers. In between songs, Vince McMahon, Mean Gene, and Jesse “The Body” Ventura provided color commentary which made the album quite original. I used to pose in the mirror to “Real American” ( Hulkster’s theme but originally for the U.S Express’ Mike Rotundo and Barry Windham) dance around like a maniac to JYD’s “Grab Them Cakes,” and pretend I knew how to line dance when “Don’t Go Messin’ with a Country Boy” by Hillbilly Jim kicked in. And sure, I’ll admit that I used to listen to Jimmy Hart’s “Eat Your Heart Out Rick Springfield,” and Rowdy Roddy Piper’s catchy tune “For Everybody” incessantly.

So what, maybe I have a few of these songs on my iPod. I’m sure you have some incriminating shit on yours too. Some TMNT “Pizza Power” anyone? I’ll forgive that because at least mutated super hero turtles were involved. But Ini Kamoze’s Hotstepper and Right Said Fred? C’mon, it looks like you need some higher quality embarrassment so you better start downloading The Wrestling Album. You see, I don’t really care if someone’s in my car and my iPod starts to play the WWF wrestler’s version of Land of a Thousand Dances. You’d be surprised at what a blast it is. I used to stare at the album cover and pick out who was singing each line.

You’ll never see anything like this again. All the wrestlers were together, singing and clapping in tandem. It was like the WWF version of We Are the World only not for charity and the opposite of touching. So how does this tie in to New Jersey? Well, Piper goes off on The Goonies, The Iron Shiek spits, Bundy threatens to squash us with his Avalanche, and perhaps the greatest manager of all time Bobby “The Brain” Heenan brilliantly warns: “I’m gonna stretch ya from here to New Jersay!” (3:18) Look out for cameos by Meatloaf and Mona Flambe aka Cyndi Lauper! As Jesse “The Body” Ventura said: “I’m gonna crush ya and ill see you lata!”

The Sexy Armpit Has Joined The WWE Fan Nation!

Posted on August 20, 2008 by sexyarmpit

Sunday was the 20th edition of WWE’s Summerslam Pay Per View. I can’t believe that the first ever Summerslam event is already 20 years old! Damn, I may as well check myself into an old age home! Summerslam ’88 was an awesome event packed with classic WWE moments. Most notably, when Miss Elizabeth ripped away her skirt to leave Million Dollar Man Ted DiBiase, and everyone else in the arena stunned. This made way for the Mega Powers to score the victory at Madison Square Garden in New York City. The Mega Powers, the greatest force known to man, paired “The Madness with The Mania.” When Hulk Hogan and Macho Man Randy Savage were together on-screen sparks always flew. They always put on great matches together and cut even better promos. ‘Til this day, no WWE superstar has come close to exuding the outrageous amount of charisma that these two superstars did.

20 years later, after watching Summerslam ’08, I can’t say that the WWE talent quality is at the exact same level but the WWE is still putting on top notch entertainment. The enthralling and dramatic montages WWE creates grab you right off of your couch and suck you right into the story lines. Today’s WWE climate is different, it’s less of a traveling carnival and more of an actual late night soap for guys AND girls, but mostly for kids. The themes WWE hits on are bold, topical, and often times…actually groundbreaking. For example, Chris Jericho is really gonna get his ass beat after accidentally popping Shawn Michaels’ pretty wife right in the mouth. But Shawn didn’t retaliate!?!?!? Now we’re dealing with psyche and morals, not just piledrivers and atomic drops. You might go through your days thinking “Damn, I forgot to pay the electric bill!” while I go through my day thinking “I can’t wait to see Shawn lose his shit and go ballistic on Jericho!” I’m pretty sure that means they’re doing a great job.

You won’t hear many TV critics or pop culture gurus giving any props to Vince McMahon and the WWE. It’ll probably continue like that until Vince McMahon kicks the bucket, and I mean for real this time! Not like the time he got into his limo and it exploded. They struck that from the record, so you should too! Just go with it, don’t ask too many questions. Let yourself be entertained. Stop being so pretentious. We’re all very similar in our makeup and WWE puts on a show that everyone can enjoy. Well, maybe not through the entire RAW broadcast, but at least when Santino Marella is out there. And Cody Rhodes! And if you can’t enjoy the hot looking WWE Divas, you’re out of your mind.

WWE has had some exciting developments. Recently they welcomed actor Freddie Prinze Jr. to their writing staff and they also unveiled their new social networking site called THE WWE FAN NATION. For a few months I’ve been hearing about this site during RAW and SMACKDOWN. Like all new Internet gimmicks my first instinct was to ignore it, but like the thought of Miss Elizabeth tearing away her skirt for my 8 year old eyes to see, it enticed me. If you’re a WWE fan, F–K Twitter, why not join the WWE Fan Nation? It’s basically WWE’s answer to MySpace. Click here to check out The Sexy Armpit’s slice of it.

Don’t feel like joining the Fan Nation? Well then, here’s a choose your own Sexy Armpit Adventure:

My “coverage” of last year’s Summerslam blogging from my cell phone live from the Continental Airlines Arena (now the Izod Center) in East Rutherford, New Jersey.

Here’s the Main Event from Summerslam ’88 which I found on You Tube. For all of you impatient, horny Miss Elizabeth fans out there, fast forward to 6:42!

Poison, Dokken, and Sebastian Bach at The PNC Bank Arts Center Review 8/12/2008

Posted on August 14, 2008 by sexyarmpit

There’s only one band who puts on a live show that successfully transports you back to 1988, and that’s Poison. Their tour has been a summer tradition for years now and they take along other bands of the genre. I wasn’t even planning on going to the Poison show in Holmdel, N.J, because I’ve seen them so many times and their show doesn’t change much. As the date the got closer I knew it was going to be a blast so I caved and wound up getting tickets anyway.

Truthfully, Poison never fails to launch the audience far into the stratosphere. They give us what we expect and it’s both a pro and a con that Poison plays songs that everyone knows. There isn’t one song that people go to the bathroom for. Fallen Angel..check…Ride The Wind…check…etc. It’s worth mentioning that Poison doesn’t have many “bathroom songs” unlike when I’m watching a WWE pay per view and there’s almost always a “bathroom match.” I would like to hear some of the lesser heard songs from their best album “Look What the Cat Dragged In,” but that never happens because Poison wants you to be familiar, on your feet, and rocking out for their entire performance. From my favorite song of theirs “Look What The Cat Dragged In,” all the way to “Unskinny Bop” they rocked the PNC bank Arts Center six ways from Sunday.

What happened to the sleazy, sexual, L.A party rock Poison used to be known for? Well, as they showed last night, they still play it proudly. Unlike most bands from the ’80s hairband era, Poison’s sound hasn’t diminished one bit. Critics have always shit on Poison and other bands from that time, and it’s unfair. Who’s selling out amphitheaters every summer? Who’s gaining new fans young and old every day? “Hey Poison, Nintendo called and they want to use ‘Nothin’ But a Good Time’ for their Wii commercial…how’d ya like several million dollars for that deal?” This band is no joke and the naysayers need to realize it. How long does it take exactly to start respecting a hard working band? Pretty damn long I guess. Kiss has been rocking since 1974 and they still get no respect. It doesn’t matter, snobby critics will kneel to the God of Thunder in due time!

The Arts Center was jammed when Poison hit the stage and ripped into their set. They played all their big songs and even The Romantics “What I like About You” from their their latest album of covers called Poison’d. During the show Bret Michaels dedicated “Something To Believe In” to the troops overseas. After the song, he complimented the crowd on how in sync our hand sways were. At least we’re good for something here in Jersey! And SOLOS, we can’t forget the solos! CC’s a shredder there’s no doubt and his solo proved it, but Rikki Rockett needs to be commended for his incredible drum solo. Rikki began at his kit bashing away and then ended doing a New York street corner style beat fest while sitting on a wooden box that he tapped with his hands. The legion of people were totally into it.

A mark of Poison’s enduring popularity is the fact that Poison packed the house while openers Sebastian Bach and Dokken both played to half of the fans. Sebastian Bach is not only a local guy (who lives literally 5 minutes from the venue) but he’s also a Rock Icon in his own right. Alot of rock fans lost respect for him over the years but I like him because he’s original and he doesn’t give a fuck what people think. Serious metal fans from that time would consider Sebastian Bach more of a formidable rock force than Poison will ever be. With classic songs like “Monkey Business,” and “Youth Gone Wild,” Bach has solidified himself in rock history as one of the greatest frontmen of all rock bands. Trust me, you’d want Baz to be the lead singer of your band! Sure Bret Michaels has a pretty face, but Baz has pipes that will clothesline the shit out of any other singer in existence. Even though years have passed, he still has one of the strongest sets of vocal cords ever. If Sebastian Bach was trying out for American Idol other contestants may as well walk home because he’d annihilate them with his powerful, dominant voice.

I waltzed in and got to hear Bach’s cover of “Back in the Saddle” and kickass rendition of Skid Row’s “Here I Am.” Unfortunately, the Jersey crowd sucked for Bach! What an embarrassment, we’re in Jersey! It’s his home town and the lame crowd isn’t into it. Unless the laymen aren’t hearing the huge hits like 18 and life, and Youth Gone Wild they sit there like humps. “C’mon get your fat asses outta those seats!” Bach yelled. This guy is pouring his heart and lungs out for us to be entertained and these uptight Jersey folks are there because they think Bret Michaels is hot…you know, “That guy from Rock of Love.” (What a shame that he’s now more popular for being on a cheesy reality show on VH1 no less.) One of the highlights of Baz’s performance was “Love is a Bitchslap” from hist latest album Angel Down. Oh yeah, and when gave a big FUCK YOU to all the people who were still in the parking lot!!!

Dokken, who was bestowed with the honor of actually opening for Poison, showed that they need some motivation juice. That Red Bull can that Don Dokken was sipping from didn’t prove to be enough to make Dokken play with the gall that Sebastian Bach did. I was looking forward to Rokken with Dokken, and they didn’t blow me away at all. Don Dokken couldn’t hit those high notes especially in Dream Warriors. Overall though, they were decent. I don’t think people realize just how many great songs Dokken has. They played so many of them last night including “In My Dreams,” “Tooth and Nail,” and “Kiss of Death.” Let’s be fair though, Dokken has been rokken for over 30 years! Give them credit that there still making new material. Or should I say Don Dokken, since he’s the only original member. I’ll definitely tell you that it was fun as hell getting to say Bach and Dokken, Bachen with Dokken, Dokken with Bachen…etc. I find I say all kinds of wacky things when I’m loaded!

You can call it a throwback or nostalgia but Poison still rocks, I just wish they’d release some new music because they’re more than capable of scoring a modern hit. If you ever have the opportunity to see a Poison show and you’re having second thoughts…by all means GO! If you were around since the days of the Glam Slam Metal Jam then you know what I’m talking about!

**Be sure to check out my friend and blogger Hell On High Heels who passionately reports on hairbands, rock shows, and reviews music HERE. Join her on her quest to bring back guitar solos!

Lost Boys: The Tribe: Movie Sucks, Corey Feldman Wins, and Film References Galore!

Posted on August 1, 2008 by sexyarmpit

“Better late than never” movie sequels seem to be the latest trend in Hollywood. In the past couple of years we’ve had to deal with sequels to movies like Rocky, and Indiana Jones, both of which were 15 years tardy. It’s not to say these films aren’t without merit. Personally I get excited when a film gets released after its franchise has been missing from theaters for close to a score. You can imagine the hefty amount of anticipation that builds up. What if the movie sucks after this huge gap of time? All that anticipation morphs together into one huge glowing energy ball and launches itself out of my stomach and rips right through the movie screen. Well, not exactly but it would actually be better if the ball traveled to the movie studios and knocked these stupid film producers right on their asses. They have no sense sometimes.

Did you ever think you were going to see a sequel to Better off Dead? Probably not, right? Well 23 years after the film was in theaters is a better time than any I’d say. Why not a sequel to The Secret of My Success (1987) while we’re at it? Or Real Genius? Any movie is fair game. The big wigs in Hollywood are so asinine that they think a lame unrelated sequel to an old school franchise is automatically going to be successful. That unfortunately isn’t the case and I’ll speak for the greater population while I say that we’d all like some new and refreshing plots and engaging films. Did you ever think of how scared movie producers are to invest their money? A smart way to sell them an original script is by saying they could package their movie as “Wes Craven Presents” or as “The Lost Boys: The Tribe” like today’s shameful example. The film was 21 years too late but lucky for us it only sucked about 90 minutes of our time away from our lives. Shit, I almost became a vampire by watching it because it sucked so much life out of me. Oh yeah…and it just sucked in general.

I’m a loyal fan of the first Lost Boys, and seeing it in theaters when it was released really had an impact on me. I would say that regardless of how many Universal horror films and Dracula movies I watched as a kid, that The Lost Boys started my fascination with vampires. That’s a heavy load to carry…a load that smells like Frog juice (for those of you with a wet bar: mix raw egg, garlic, and holy water).

Lost Boys: The Tribe was a lame excuse for a sequel. It basically just used the name “Lost Boys” and the character of Edgar Frog played by Corey Feldman. The rest of it is “The O.C meets The Lost Boys.” The characters, especially the villains, get killed off quickly and we don’t even get much of a chance to love them or hate them. The introduction of Edgar Frog seems uneven in the film. Personally I think the script was written as a typical vampire film and then reworked after the producers lured The Feldster back in the mix. Well who cares, as long as Corey Feldman is back! He’s the man in this film and the highlight of the entire movie. He looks like he’s having a lot of fun playing Edgar Frog again and it’s a damn shame that he doesn’t have, at the very least, the success of his Goonies counterpart Sean Astin.

Speaking of The Goonies, utter suckyness aside, Lost Boys the Tribe spent a lot of time referencing a bunch of films. The blatant references became ridiculous at times. It seemed like the filmmakers wanted to name drop movies to be cool with the hipsters. You know those people…the ones who latch onto things way too late but they think they discovered something new.

Here’s a list of movie references from Lost Boys: The Tribe

10:12 Yes, The Tribe references…wait for it…The Lost Boys! There’s a short montage reminiscent of one in the original where various “strange” people around town are shown. This guy is clearly supposed to represent how Tim Cappello’s (greased up sax player singing “I Still Believe”) character would look 20 years later. The Tribe only wishes they had something as cool as a greased up WWE looking sax player singing that badass song. It would’ve worked wonders. If The Tribe is a hideous zit, then greasy Tim Cappello is the Clearasil.

13:23 “…Yes leave our address at the creepy Texas Chainsaw Massacre trailer, it’s a good plan”
17:11 Besides Corey Feldman’s flawless performance, this reference is the films only saving grace: “You mean to say the two of you have never heard of The Goonies? You are in for a very serious treat.” Truer words were never spoken! Maybe 17 minutes into the film the DVD player actually just starts playing The Goonies instead and Lost Boys The Tribe was actually all a big joke! That’s marketing genius. Let’s sell more copies of The Goonies! I wonder if the same people who made Vice Versa and Trading Places feel like making “Edgar Frog meets Clark “Mouth” Devereaux?” If so then I’m offering to direct it.
18:48 “…ties the whole room together kinda like that rug in The Big Lebowski”
1:00:39 You don’t get much more blatant than this: “Warriors! Come out to Play-ay!”
1:10:12 While it’s not really a movie, I had to throw it in: “That’s still something I can see on my Girls Gone Wild Box Set…”

All the movie references in the world wouldn’t have saved this piece of trash, even Haim’s bizarre appearance in an alternate ending. Please, someone important hire Corey Feldman so he can finally get his due! And get all of us who watched Lost Boys: The Tribe a mind wipe from that Haitian guy on Heroes so we won’t have to remember sitting through it.

The Changing of the Geek

Posted on May 6, 2008September 5, 2018 by sexyarmpit

Can you even recall when black rimmed glasses and a pocket protector was the sole association with a geek? For me, it doesn’t seem that long ago that Eugene from the Grease films was the first person who came to mind when I heard that word. Heck, even Screech Powers from Saved by the Bell was synonymous with Nerd or Geek. Robert Carradine and Anthony Edwards stood up for all who were nerdy in the Revenge of the Nerds series and I honestly can’t see a modern day “re-imagining” of that series because the idea of Nerd or Geek has totally changed.

Is there even a clear difference between a geek and a nerd? The classic definition of a nerd/geek varies greatly from what it is today. At one time, geeks were typically guys, ultra intelligent, never seemed to know how to dress, and they definitely couldn’t talk to girls (if only they had Beauty and the Geek back then). I bet my coveted toy WWE spinner belt that you or someone you know has been called a computer nerd. Nowadays, it seems that a geek is someone who is heavily into computers, comics, gaming, sci-fi, or nostalgia. As a matter of fact, you can be a geek with just about anything if you’re THAT obsessed with it. But it doesn’t sound right when you say “I’m a music geek, or a movie nerd.” With that said, it seems those once derogatory terms can’t be used universally. For now, let’s just assume they refer to similar types of people.

Since the ’50s we’ve had the pleasure of poking fun at these smart, goofy bastards called Nerds. Back then they were mostly found in high schools or libraries getting shaken down for their lunch money or a term paper or overzealously raising their hands at each question asked by the teacher and getting every answer so right that you thought you might be missing your frontal lobe.

Geeks across the nation rallied and experienced one hell of a renaissance once the ’90s rolled around. Perhaps Family Matters’ Steve Urkel captured the title of one of the most familiar modern day geeks. How can fanboys like me, (a much better term I’d say) and say…your friend who’s into fantasy role playing games be considered the same kind of animal? It just doesn’t seem right. I always felt it was a negative comment to call someone a geek or a nerd and now it’s just as insulting, but in different way. I get called a geek all the time and I’ve just come to accept it and brand myself one before anyone can pounce on it. It’s easier to say I’m a superhero geek to make it easier for people to understand what I’m about. Have you been called a geek because you love Star Wars? Now anyone who loves Star Wars is considered a “Star Wars Geek.” Lame but true. Why should we be persecuted for what we like?

It became a whole different IQ test when bands like Weezer surprised the shit out of the music business helping to introduce the genre known as “geek rock.” While they had smart, self depreciating lyrics filled with pop references, and hard rock with memorable hooks, they were far from geeks. It may have just been a style they went for to be tongue in cheek considering one of Rivers Cuomo’s previous bands was considered a hair band.

Nerds are penetrating pop culture more than ever before. Right at this minute you can open up another browser page and look at a whole online store that sells stuff that nerds would drool over (ThinkGeek). Hell, there’s even an entire magazine dedicated to geek culture…(which at this moment i’m fantasizing about subscribing to) Geek Monthly . Even consumers who are apprehensive about buying computer and home theater equipment can call in the “Geek Squad” to save the day. Why is it that you have to be a geek to know about computers and hook up electronics?

A trendy term in the past few years “Geek Chic,” refers to everything geek becoming cool. Damn, you would need to be up on your “Geekspeak” before you could possibly know what “Cheek Chic” is. On the defunct “O.C,” Adam Brody’s Seth Cohen was a hero to the nerd kingdom. He was like Ghandi, or Abraham Lincoln bringing us one step closer to freedom. Seth had a thing for graphic novels, death cab, he drew and wrote his own comics, coined his own words, and dug The Goonies. You can’t get more geeky than that. But more recently on TV, G4’s influential Attack of the Show features Kevin Pereira and Olivia Munn, two good looking non geeky hosts giving the run down on all that is geeky. They discuss the latest tech gadgets, superhero films, and report live from what is known as “geek nirvana” the Comic Con. With them leading the geek charge it’s no wonder that geeks of today are only called that for lack of a better term.

You know what geek or nerd are euphemisms for? Pathetic. I swear. You and I…and everyone else…we need to accept that and revolt. We need to take on a new moniker because we don’t have much in common with those old school, pocket protected, highwater-wearing nerds. Think about it…is everyone who wears black rimmed glasses a geek? I’m sure some of them are but not all. Why in the name of all namers couldn’t we have named this new “geek” revolution something else? Webster’s dictionary makes a big deal about adding new slang terms each year that we stopped using years ago and we couldn’t think of another word that would better describe us? Video Gameamaniacs, Comic Bookers, Nostalgaddicts, none of them will work. In America we are always concerned about being PC and calling every different ethnic group the proper name so I think it’s only fair to give us geeks the same respect. This is a stigma that I hereby vow to eradicate. IT’S TIME FOR OUR REVOLUTION, GEEKS NEED A NEW NAME!

Halloween 1981

Posted on October 11, 2007 by sexyarmpit

Last weekend I was looking through a box of old photos from Halloween’s past. These pictures become time machines for me. I came across quite a few that were taken at school during Halloween parades or just in the classroom. The one I’m posting today actually has nothing to do with me at all. This is Halloween 1981 and my sister dressed up as one of her favorite characters Holly Hobbie. The Wikipedia entry mentions that Hobbie was popular throughout the ‘70s, although I know for a fact she still held her own through the early ‘80s as well. Even though I was a little kid during that time I remember my sis loving Holly Hobbie.

In this photo my sister was one of the Holly Hobbies way in the back row. The Holly Hobbie closer to the front was actually “Evil Holly Hobby.” You can tell because she’s the one looking pissed off with her arms folded grumbling some crap about another girl dressing up as the same character. With more scrutiny we can see a lot of superhero representation here. There’s a possible Wonder Woman to the right of my sister in the back whose head is behind the kid with the red cloak. There’s a roaring Incredible Hulk in the front and then another poor Hulk stuck in the back biting his nails. He seems worried that he’s not as good as the proud ferocious Hulk who demands the spotlight. We can also pick out a few Spider Man costumes, a Superman, a kickass vintage Yoda costume, and finally an awesome Darth Vader with his mask up…dammit!

Leaving out the kids that make me giggle would be a crime. How about the little Asian boy with a cowboy hat on? (WWE fans: Is that Jimmy Wang Yang? was he foreseeing the future?) Is it even a cowboy hat? I totally don’t want to sound wrong but who are the kids in the front with the sheet over their head with their hats on supposed to be? The one in the front row’s face is being obstructed by the Incredible Ham Hulk who is raping the camera. You also can’t miss the innocent, friendly looking Snoopy. He doesn’t seem like that sarcastic, mischievous Snoopy we know from the cartoon. The ever-living Strawberry Shortcake makes an appearance as well as a nurse (yay).

Perhaps the winner for most enigmatic costume is the young New York Giant on the bottom left who is donning a #33. I have no idea who #33 was on the Giants back in the late ‘70s or early ‘80s. I’m going to assume that it was a generic N.Y Giants children’s costume with a random number on it unless one of the awesome Sexy Armpit readers can provide me with some answers! Lol. Oh, I saved the very best for last. On the right side, attached to the railing… is that a clown with an enormous fro, or is this supposed to be a character of some type?

I hope you enjoyed looking at some of these old-school costumes. Do you have any memories of these? If so, drop a comment! Especially if you know who the blonde guy is with the stars on his shirt. Evil Knievel? One of the Duke boys? I have a lot more Halloween related material coming your way here at TheSexyArmpit.com so stay tuned and as always, I appreciate you stopping by!

Live from WWE Summerslam!

Posted on August 27, 2007 by sexyarmpit

I’m blogging live from Summerslam at the Continental Airlines Arena. I rarely see palm trees and surfboards in this arena but today they make up the Titantron set. There’s already dueling Cena/Orton chants going on. The crowd is pumped.
Posted by Jay Amabile at 6:33 PM

Fiber optic palm trees baby!
Posted by Jay Amabile at 6:38 PM

I just witnessed an unbelievable entrance and match with the return of Triple H. The place went ballistic. CM Punk lost to Morrison and the 2 Championship matches are left to go. Batista just made his entrance.
Posted by Jay Amabile at 9:00 PM

Fans are bored and doing the wave. We have the classiest fans…and fiber optic palm trees.
Posted by Jay Amabile at 9:07 PM